Chapter 19: Endgame
Disclaimer: I do not own nor am am I affiliated with Big Time Rush (BTR), Viacom, or Nickelodeon. This is a work of fiction and is for entertainment only.
This work contains acts of homosexuality, so if you're offended by such material then leave now.
No one under the age of 18 or 21 (Check your local laws) is permitted to read this material.
Note: So you might be thinking, what is next? Well, all I'm going to say is prepare to be mindf*****! LOL. Remember guys, help out nifty by making donations. You can find the info on their website. Well without further or due, enjoy the new chapter! It might be a while before I can start working on the next one, but I'll try and do what I can.
Logan walks into the room and targets his eyes upon James. He is cowardly resting on the ground, his eyes red and tears flowing like the Nile. His gut starts to burn, but his heart plagues his desire to scream out against him. Logan bites his lips trying to regain his composure. He closed his eyes and took a deep breath preparing to approach the very young man that brought his misery upon him. He opens his eyes and again his very soul burns with the anger of an army. He looks down trying to calm himself but fails. He begins to walk.
James cannot move. He is frozen in place filled with fear. He shakes seeing Logan walking towards him. He is so distraught, he cannot muster up the strength nor courage to make eye contact. Logan's eyes remain fixated on James. He holds back his very desire to attack him, never in his life had Logan been more infuriated.
Logan rests his back against the wall and slides down. By this time James has brought his knees to his chest, hugging them for dear life. He was going to face Logan alone, there was no one there to protect him.
"Look at me." Logan commands. "I said look at me."
James remains still, not moving his head. Logan takes a deep breath. There is an awkward silence and Logan continues to look at James.
"Why?" Logan asks. "Why would you want to hurt me? Why would you want to hurt Carlos. We're friends, and you always wanted he and I to be happy, so why would you do this? Speak!"
"I......I......I'm sorry." James muttered out.
"I'm not asking for an apology, I want an answer, now tell me!" Logan screamed.
"I don't know." James answered.
"Carlos is still in a coma. He will always suffer from the accident, and you know what, it's all your fault. All of this is your fault. Carlos is one of your best friends, and you betrayed him. You're so frightened to face me, so what are you going to do when you face him?" Logan took a deep breath.
James finally looked at Logan. "I never wanted to hurt anyone. I never wanted any of this to happen."
"Well it did happen!" Logan violently screamed. "It happened, and you're not even man enough to take responsibility! How often have you even visited him?"
"Look, I know I really screwed up okay. I know I hurt you, I hurt Carlos. It's my fault that Griffin cancelled us. Honestly if I could all of never happen I would. I just want to be loved. I want what you and Carlos have." James put his head down in shame.
Logan couldn't speak. Something deep inside of him felt sorrow. He looked at James with a confused look.
"What do you mean?" Logan asked.
"I want someone who will love me. Someone who really cares about me. That is all I've ever wanted." James said. "I've never had what I wanted most. I look at you and Carlos and there is so much love. You laugh together. I see your smiles. I wasn't thinking when I did what I did."
Logan couldn't speak. He felt all of his anger fade away. He stood up and looked down at James. He was going to speak again, but no words could form. He just sighed and grabbed his head.
"That still gives you no reason to do what you did." Logan fell back down to his knees. "This really hurt. I've spent so many nights crying myself to sleep. Do you know how much it hurts to see him in that bed motionless? Even if I forgive you, I'll always remember this."
"I'll do whatever I have to do to prove that I'm sorry. I just wanted to be loved. Kendall had me, but it was like he wasn't even there half of the time. Taylor likes me, but I can tell it's not going to be a long term thing. You had one of the most beautiful romances I have ever seen, and I got jealous. I just want somoene to love me for who I am, and not my looks, or how good I am in bed." James started to cry again.
Logan looked directly into James' eyes and bit his lips. "When you want to prove how sorry you are, I want to be there when you have to face Carlos. Whatever he decides will be the one I stand behind. If he forgives you, I will too."
James looked at Logan and nodded his head. The both stood up and walked away from one another. Logan walked out of the apartment and looked at his phone. He made his way to the courtyard when he bumped into Eric.
"Hey Logan!" Eric said as he smiled from ear to ear.
"Oh, hey Eric. How are you?"
"I'm great man. So what brings you around this area?"
"Oh, I just happened to walking through."
"Oh. So you wanna maybe just hang out for a little?"
"I have to, um, yeah I guess so."
Logan followed Eric back into the Hotel. They arrived in his apartment and they both walked in. They sat down for a little and started talking again.
"So I just wanted to know how everything is going with the movie you're working on?"Logan asked trying to avoid awkwardness.
"Oh it's all going by real nice. There is a lot going on, but I have like two days to just relax."
"Yeah? That sounds kind of cool."
"So, um, you want something to drink?"
"Sure. I'll take some water."
"Cool."
Eric stood up and grabbed a bottled water and he grabbed a tea. He headed back over to the living room and handed the water to Logan. He sat back down and smiled at him. He leaned forward to try and kiss Logan. Just as he tried, Logan moved away.
"Woah, what are you doing?" Logan asked looking shocked.
"I just though, I mean, you always just seemed to want to..."
"Oh my God, no. I was just looking for a friend."
"Oh my God, I feel so embarassed. There must be someone."
"Yeah, actually there is. I'm sorry Eric. I can't do this. I really have to go."
Logan got up and walked out of the apartment and headed out of the hotel. He walked off to the hospital.
Kendall was meeting with Gustavo and Griffin. Just as he was waiting in the lobby Kelly walked out to greet him.
"Hey Kendall, I just want you to know I took care of everything. I made the call, and he said that he'll be here. Gustavo and I were also talking to Lady Gaga, she said that she'll help any way that she can."
"Awesome. So do you know when he'll be here?"
"I don't have an exact time, but when he says that he'll be here, he will."
Gustavo walked out to greet Kendall and they headed up to meet with Griffin and the remaining board members. They walked into the room and Griffin was sitting down with his hands folded. Kendall and Gustavo sat down.
"I thought I had made my point the last time we talked." Griffin said. "With Carlos in the hospital, and no clear sign of recovery in the near future, I can not allow the label to continue this expense. This is a business, and I had to make an executive decision. That is why it is final. You're not going to get me to change my mind.
"Oh, I'm not going to be the one to change your mind." Kendall started to smile as a knock came to the door.
The door opened and Griffin nearly feel from his seat. "Mr. Fujusaki when did you get in?"
"Aparently not early enough Arthur." Mr. Fujusaki said with an angry look on his face.
"What brings you into town." Griffin asked.
"You made a business decision, but you never consulted me about it. Big Time Rush is not owned by you, it is owned by the record company. A substantial investment is mine. You have no right to interupt. Though Big Time Rush is still growing here in the States, they are growing in popularity internationally." Mr. Fujusaki said. "This is exactly why I am here. I am going to make a deal. If Carlos can return back to the scene in one year, then the group will continue. If he cannot return, a new member will be put in his place. This is my decision. Everyone please leave while I speak to Mr. Griffin alone."
Everyone cleared the room. Kendall, Gustavo, and Kelly were clapping their hands outside. There was another chance.
Logan had arrived at the hospital. They had moved Carlos into another room after he had shown greater signs of improvement. Logan found the new room and knocked on the door. He walked in to see Carlos' parents sitting down. Mrs. Garcia looked up at Logan and smiled. she waved for him to walk forward faster. She seemed relieved. Logan was confused, and as he came closer he saw an open eyed and awake Carlos in the bed. The two met eyes and Logan smiled. Carlos looked back and smiled as his eyes began to water. Logan ran towards Carlos' side trying to contain himself. He started crying, but this time, his tears were made of complete joy.
"We tried calling you, but your phone went straight to voicemail." Mrs. Gacia said.
"Oh really?" Logan asked as he pulled out his cell phone. "Oh, looks like my phone died. Oh my God, Carlos you're awake!"
"I think we'll leave you two alone for a little." Mrs. Garcia said as she walked out with her husband.
Logan looked back at Carlos and leaned forward to kiss him on the forehead. Carlos whimpered.
"I'm sorry babe, my whole body just hurts so much, but it felt so nice." Carlos said.
"I've been here so many times."
'I know. I wanted to open my eyes so hard. I could here everything you were saying, I could feel you here with me the whole time."
Logan started to cry again. "I love you so much baby."
"I love you too." Carlos started to choke up. "My body hurts so much, but you're here, and I couldn't ask for more. I wish I had paid attention to you I, but I was just so hurt and angry."
"Can you move?" Logan asked.
"Yeah, The doctor was in here earlier, and I can move everything, it just hurts real bad."
"Do you remember anything from the accident?"
"My eyes were filled with tears, and I guess I just didn't see the car coming. I didn't want to do this on purpose, but the hospital doesn't believe me, so they want me to speak with some counselor or someone."
"Oh baby, I'm just so happy that you're okay." Logan wiped his face. "I thought I had lost you. I thought that I was never going to see you again. I cried so much. I love you so much, and the thought of losing you, hurt me so much. Can you hug me?"
"I don't want to hurt you."
"Don't worry. I want that feeling back. Please?"
Logan leaned forward and gently hugged Carlos. The feeling was so warming and connecting. Carlos slowly wrapped his arms around Logan and squeezed him. They broke their hug and looked at each other.
Logan started to cry again. "So when can you come back home?"
"Well the doctors said that they need to run a few tests just to make sure I'm clear, but I can be sore for a while. He said that I might never be the same, but I'm just so happy to see you. So where is James?"
"I don't know. He said he is sorry for everything, but I don't know. I have some bad news though."
"What is it?" Carlos asked trying to shift his weight.
"Griffin has cancelled us. He shut Big Time Rush down." Logan said as he sat down.
"Ugh. How much happened since the accident?"
"We've kind of fallen apart. It didn't take long. I don't care though. Even if we go back, I'll still stand by your side baby, I'll never leave you." Logan wiped the tears from Carlos' eyes.
"I want to get out of this hospital so bad. I just want to be in bed with you, I don't care wherever it might be, I just want to hold you so bad, but my body hurts so much. When I move my ribs hurt, and the neck is really bothering me."
"It's okay baby. I'll be here for you, for everything. I even sponge bathed you."
"Were you at least gentle?" Carlos asked trying to laugh.
"Yes baby, I was very gentle." Logan smiled.
The two reamined in a momentary silence only smiling at each other. Logan moved forward and planted a soft kiss on Carlos' lips. They looked into each other's eyes, and they kissed again. The kiss only seemed to last a few seconds, but they had been interlocked for almost twenty mintues when a knock came to the door. Kendall walked in with James.
"Oh my God, Carlos you're awake!" Kendall said dashing towards his friend.
"Yeah. It's so nice to see you guys." Carlos said.
James wouldn't budge. He just stood where he was looking at Carlos and Logan.
"I got some big news. I managed to call Kelly, and she made a phone call to Mr. Fujisaki, you guys remember him?" Kendall asked.
"Fujisaki, Griffin's boss." Logan said looking at Kendall.
"Yep. So he came down, and he was angry with Griffin for cancelling us without getting his permission first. So he said Big Time Rush is going to continue, but there is a catch. If Carlos can return in a year to where he was, everything will be fine. If he can't dance and move around, Fujisaki will have him replaced." Kendall said scratching the back of his head.
"Oh, damn. I mean I'm happy, I just don't know if I'll be able to do it." Carlos said as he coughed.
Kendall looked at Carlos and Logan. "Trust me, we're all here together, we'll help anyway we can to get you back on your feet, and have our old Carlos back. I um, have to get going. I know you and James have some talking to do. I'll catch up later."
Kendall walked out of the room and Logan grabbed two chairs. He put one on each side of Carlos and told James to sit down. James looked at Carlos and looked away.
"I just wanted to say I'm sorry Carlos. This is all my fault." James looked at the ground. "I never wanted any of this to happen."
"No, I just forgot to look both ways before crossing the street." Carlos said with a smile. "It really hurt when I walked out of the room. While I was sleeping, that same event just replayed in my mind over and over. You're my best friend James, and you really betrayed my trust. How do I know that I can ever trust you again?"
"I don't know. I know I betrayed you, I did something that I should have never done. I don't even know if I deserve your trust, but I will do whatever it takes to earn it back." James started to cry.
Logan stood up, but before he could speak James jumped up from his seat and pulled a knife from his pocket. He ran forward and stabbed Carlos in the stomach repeatedly. Logan couldn't move, he was frozen in place. The screaming was so loud, and Logan fell to his knees. Carlos looked back at Logan reaching for his hand...
Logan woke up screaming. His heart was beating wildly, and he was dreenched in sweat. Carlos sat up in the bed and grabbed Logan.
"Baby what's wrong are you okay?" Carlos was starting to panic.
"Carlos, are you okay?" Logan said lifitng up Carlos' shirt and touching him.
"Babe, are you okay?" Carlos started to grow very conscerned.
"The accident, the stabbing, everything." Logan didn't seem to make any sense at all.
"Babe what are you talking about? Are you sure you're okay? I'm worried." Carlos held Logan tighter.
Kendall and James ran into the room. "Is Logan okay?" They both asked.
"Where are we?" Logan asked looking around.
"Baby, we're in San Francisco. I think you should go to the hosptial. You bumped your head last night, are you sure that you're okay?" Carlos looked into Logan's confused eyes.
"What do you mean?" Logan asked.
"Baby, we did the show yesterday. When we were leaving you slipped and bumped your head. You said you were okay." Carlos started to move the covers.
"I guess it was all just a dream, a bad dream." Logan said.
"It's okay baby, whatever it was I'm here." Carlos wrapped his arms around Logan and kissed him on the neck.
"Should we take Logan to the hospital?" James asked.
"No. I'm okay I promise. I just had a very bad dream. If I'm not feeling good tomorrow, I'll go I promise." Logan said.
"Okay. Well, we'ere right here in case you need us. Goodnight guys." Kendall said and he grabbed James by the waist as they headed back to bed.
"Are you sure that you're okay?" Carlos asked.
"Yes baby. I guess I just had a nightmare, Hug me?" Logan rested on his side.
Carlos came from behind and wrapped his arm around Logan and kissed him on the back of the neck.
"Goodnight, and rest gently my love. Here in my arms, I'll hold you until the light of dawn. I'll when you cry, I'll when you're happy, I'll hold you until the end of my life. I love you baby," Carlos sang to Logan.
"That was so beautiful baby. Thank you so much. I love you. You know I would never try to do anything to hurt you right?" Logan asked.
"Of course baby. I would never hurt you either. I love you with all of my heart, and I know you love me the same." Carlos whispered.
Logan took a deep breath and made a relieved sigh. "Goodnight baby."
"Goodnight my love." Carlos said as he kissed Logan on the back of the neck one last time.
The two drifted off to a peaceful sleep. Logan felt the warmness in Carlos' heart and was at peace. Everything was a dream, everything was perfect.