Jem N I

**Disclaimer: This story is completely fictional. Any names

• given in this story are completely imaginary although some

• characters are based on actual people. The events described

• here never took place and any similarities to actual

• occurrences are completely coincidental. If you are offended

• by sexual relationships between teenage males, you should

• probably not read this. I would include a clause here about

• under-aged people viewing this document but those of them that

• get this far aren't going to stop here. Use proper judgment. **Distribution: This story may be archived and distributed freely

• but only if unaltered. This segment must remain as well as

• the text at the bottom. I would also appreciate an e-mail

• stating where it is being posted, but that is not totally

• necessary. **Web Site: http://www.fortunecity.com/westwood/lagerfeld/248/ **Comments: This was intended to be as much a love story as

• anything else. A lot of thought went into this story, if you

• enjoy it you may mail me at GideonVI@aol.com. Comments are

• appreciated and I will reply to any I receive. Flames will be

• ignored and deleted. Enjoy.

Jem'n'I II: Aftermath

Part II

"Cat and Mouse"

or

"Aftermath II: The Wrath of Love"

By Paul ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

For four years, I only ever considered being with one person. Jem Little was all I had ever needed. All I ever wanted. He had a perfect body, beautifully golden hair, and hazel eyes deeper than any one could ever dream. The best part was that I had him. I didn't have to push or shove or fight for him. He was mine. I was his. But I was sixteen.

Mike Roberts was taller than Jem by an inch or so. I always liked tall guys. His hair, though not perfectly combed, was a lovely shade of dirty blond and fell to the center of his ears. His face was splashed lightly with freckles, not so much that they were overdone, but enough to make themselves apparent. Freckles are cute. His eyes made even Jem's look shallow. I felt jealous looking at them. I suppose anyone would, that shade of brown could be no more perfect, and no less beautiful. And braces, well, I hardly need to state that braces are cute. It's a simple fact. The only problem: Mike was a friend, and dating another friend.

So Jem was my model of perfection. Where did that leave Mike? Mike excelled well beyond that perfection. I found myself at an interesting juncture. I was dating Jem and Mike was dating Ryan Zimmerman. It's a simple fact, and it wasn't like either was a new relationship. We were quite used to being taken and usually didn't go beyond that. So what were we doing kissing in the front seat of my car?

"Oh my God," Mike whispered almost inaudibly as our lips parted. His eyes were wide, almost surely out of fear. He was obviously trying to find something to say, but there were no words to describe the situation.

"Yeah," I agreed. While he was at least a year younger than me, Mike was no beginner with relationships. He and Ryan had been together for months. It was a picturesque relationship, nobody would break it up. But Mike had kissed me.

"That, uh, that didn't happen. Lets just go," he said quietly. We both faced forward and pretended the other didn't exist. I dropped Mike off at his house and proceeded home.

When I got to the house, I carried the McDonalds food I'd bought inside, but after setting it on the table, I forgot about it. I looked around. Things were looking nicer. After the previous night's party, my brother was doing a great job of cleaning. He and his boyfriend were cleaning the kitchen when I walked through it. They could probably both see the confused look on my face.

"Where's Mike?" Jay asked when he realized I was alone.

"Home," I responded in a very hushed voice.

As I walked toward my bedroom, I looked at nothing. There may have been other people in the house, but I certainly couldn't face them. Jem had gone home to visit his mother. It was nearly Christmas, and he'd been going to see her almost daily - something he hadn't done much in the months since his father's death.

I fell backwards onto my bed and stared at the ceiling. I imagine that back in the kitchen, Jay and Shawn exchanged odd glances before Jay walked slowly to my room.

"You wanna take this one from the top, Ben?" he asked as he fell on the other end of the bed. I looked toward him. His face was as comforting as his voice. I don't think I'd have talked to anyone else. I usually talked to my brother about my problems, though, and a problem was what I had.

"Mike kissed me," I said quickly. It was hard enough a concept to fathom, much less say. My mind had been knocked into a loop. I honestly wasn't concerned with why he kissed me or what happened afterwards. I was concerned about why I liked it so much.

"Jesus, Ben, you sound like you enjoyed it," Jay said, more from denial than anything. I remained silent. "So then what?"

"He said it never happened and I took him home. He was nervous. Real nervous," I explained. My voice was cooperating more. It was usually easier to talk to Jay. I guess I probably just wanted to be alone. He felt that.

"Jem went home. I'll tell you about it later," Jay said as he exited the room. He closed the door and I fell asleep. And that was all that was left to be said about it.

"We kinda need to talk." It was a simple invitation. And we did need to talk. There were things I wanted to say to him, and things he wanted to say to me. For months everything had been up in the air, but after this most recent change of events, I felt there was much to discuss.

"Sure," I responded, hardly pulling my eyes away from the ceiling fan. I hadn't left my room all day. At the time, I was leaning way back in my chair and staring at the ceiling. Jem gave me a disgusted look.

"This is serious, Ben. Act like you're listening," he said. I sat up and looked at him, not knowing what he intended to say.

"You have my undivided attention," I replied with a smirk. Jem didn't even smile.

"When I went home today, my mother told me she's going to Iowa to spend Christmas with her family," Jem informed me. My first thought was something along the lines of "So what? That's not so serious." Then it occurred to me that Jem would not be mentioning it if only his mother would be going.

"Where is she going to get an airplane ticket to Iowa this close to Christmas?" I asked naively.

"She isn't. She wants to drive," Jem said. That sounded unlikely.

"Your mother's been chronically depressed for the past four months and you're going to let her drive half-way across the country in the middle of Winter?" I asked, shocked. My expression changed as I realized what Jem would say next.

"I'm going to drive her. We're leaving tonight," he replied. And he was gone. We parted kindly, both knowing his mother would want to stay for some time.

Jem said on the phone later that he would be missing some school. As I recall, he would be gone three weeks. It was only twenty-one days, but it was the longest twenty-one days of my entire life.

"Just pretend it didn't happen, okay?" Mike said without ever making eye contact. He looked ready to slam the door in my face, but I felt we needed to talk.

"No. It happened. And if I try to pretend it didn't, I'll go insane thinking about it. We need to talk," I said in the most threatening voice I could think of. Mike looked away, but allowed me into his house.

"I really didn't mean to.." he began, but his sentence ended prematurely as he realized we were alone again.

"You wouldn't have if you didn't mean to. You wanna talk about it?" I offered. He didn't want to talk about anything. I was quite determined to drag it out of him, though.

"I guess maybe I'm a little bored with Ryan, that's all. I seen you look at me before, I figured maybe.." he trailed off again. My heart leaped at that. He couldn't bring himself to say it, but I knew what he really wanted.

"You hoped maybe I liked you," I stated. I suppose it was more of a wish than a statement. I had always liked Jem, but no matter how many times I kissed him or had sex with him, there wasn't much between us. I had come to think I only slept with Jem out of habit. Mike fascinated me, though. There was more than just a small attraction to him. That scared me.

"Yeah, uh, I guess so," Mike replied. He was looking down at his shoes. I pulled his chin up with my finger and placed my lips against his. He hardly objected to this advance and placing his arms around me, he pulled me into the house.

"What about Ryan?" I asked, thinking suddenly about how Ryan would feel.

"What about him?" Mike asked. He began kissing my neck, sending chills down my spine. I breathed in quickly.

"Nothing, I guess," I replied. A crashing noise came from the back of the house. "What was that?"

"Oh shit," Mike said, backing away from me. He looked very concerned.

"What?" I asked. Mike was becoming pale.

"I forgot all about him," he replied.

"Who?" I demanded. Mike began to walk toward his bedroom.

"My cousin," he answered. His cousin. I was worried that it would be Ryan or Mike's mom or something.

The next thing I heard from the back of the house was arguing. That, I decided, was my cue to leave.

"Is Jay home?" Shawn asked before the door was completely open.

"Naw, he and Dad ran out for something. You wanna come in?" I offered. Shawn walked into the house and sat on the couch. I sat in an adjacent chair. No use leaving him alone.

"Ben can I ask you a question?" Shawn asked almost inaudibly.

"Sure, what's up?" I replied.

"Does Jay talk about me a lot?" Shawn asked with some concern. I wasn't sure I understood the question. Jay and Shawn were such a perfect couple it was scary.

"Of course he talks about you, why?" I answered. Shawn looked away.

"Do you think I'm cute?" he asked. I thought it was a silly question. The boy had lovely hair. I'd call the shade "burnt golden brown," but what do I know? His eyes were a very soft brown. His skin almost matched his hair. He spent a lot of time in the sun when he could and it showed.

"Very cute. You wanna tell me what this is about?" I almost demanded an answer. Shawn was obviously concerned, but I wasn't seeing why.

"Jay just seems.. well.. distant sometimes," he said. I could have laughed right there. If there's a single word that describes my little brother, it's distant.

"How long have you known Jay?" I asked, suppressing the urge to giggle.

"Four years," Shawn replied. He was examining a finger-nail which was apparently chipped. I could have laughed at that, too.

"And how long have you been sleeping with him?" I asked. Shawn looked up at me quickly. We never really discussed the subject. I knew he was having sex with my brother. It mostly just bothered me to think about it.

"Three years, I guess," he answered.

"And you never thought he was distant before?" I asked sarcastically.

"Well, no. He usually pays a lot of attention to me. Lately, though, he's been distant," Shawn explained. He looked almost ready to cry so I moved to the couch and put an arm around him. Shawn leaned on me for comfort.

"Shawn, you and Jay have been together for three years. You spend all of your free time here. You're practically my little-brother-in-law. I'll talk to Jay for you," I offered. Shawn smiled. I could feel his heart beat slow to normal. I think he felt better knowing I'd at least talk to Jay.

And as if dictated by script, the door opened. It was Jay and Dad. I'm sure one of them would get the wrong idea if there wasn't a tear on Shawn's face.

"You okay?" Dad asked. Shawn sniffled and nodded. Jay motioned with his head to indicate that he would be in his room. I nodded and patted Shawn on the shoulder.

"Go play N64 with Jay or something. I'll talk to him later," I said. Shawn nodded, wiped his face, and walked down the hall.

"What was wrong with him?" Dad asked, looking down the hall to make sure both younger boys were out of ear-shot.

"He's had a rough week," I explained vaguely. I decided quickly that the explanation was sufficient. Dad wasn't the best person to get involved in relationship problems. I grabbed my jacket and shoes and headed for the car.

Life is what you get when you toss your math homework, your heart, and your gym socks in a blender: a confusing jumble of emotions that tends to stink once in a while. It was terrible timing that Jem and I were having relationship problems at the same time as Jay and Shawn. I was almost tempted to call a psychic hotline, but I sure wasn't stupid... or was I?

"Is your brother home?" I asked at the door of the Zimmerman house.

"He's in his room," Erin replied. I had hoped to get some information from her appearance, but if she was hiding any secrets, her make-up was doing a great job of covering them.

"Is he alone?" I asked softly.

"No, I think the cat's in there, too," Erin joked. She let me into the house, and watched me walk down the hall. It was a short hall, but it could have been miles.

"Ryan?" I knocked lightly on the door.

"Come in," he said. I pushed the door open and walked in. Ryan was sitting on his bed. His TV was off, and he didn't have anything in his hands. I thought it odd that he would sit there doing nothing.

"I wanted to talk to you," I said slowly. I had no idea how to even begin to tell Ryan what was going on. Fortunately for me, he knew more than I thought.

"I knew you would. You're a good friend like that," he said calmly.

"You.. you know?" I asked.

"Mike's cousin Pete called me. He said you and Mike were kissing in the living room," Ryan explained. He remained calm. I was a little shocked that he hadn't killed me yet.

"Well, not exactly. Mike was kissing me," I clarified. Ryan didn't seem to care.

"I've had a couple hours to think about it. It's not like I never cheated on Mike. But I wasn't kissing one of his friends. I wouldn't do that," Ryan said steadily. I'm not sure whether or not he was trying to make me feel guilty, but it was working.

"He started it!" I accused. I guess I was going for a cheap laugh. Ryan usually appreciated my sarcasm, but these were unusual times.

"Then you don't like him?" Ryan asked.

"No--Yes--I mean.. Aw, hell. His eyes are so soft and he has that.."

"Smile."

"Yeah. The smile. He's just so.."

"Cute."

"Gorgeous! Quit interrupting!" I shouted.

"You think the smile is nice, you should see what's in his pants," Ryan offered with a grin.

"I don't want to, though!" I argued. It was a lie, though. I did. I really didn't care so much that Ryan was my friend, or that I loved Jem. I've always been the type of person that acts on impulses and Mike sent more impulses through me than I ever needed to feel.

"Maybe you need to tell Mike that."

"Maybe I will," I said honestly. And on that note, I left. And for all the leaving I did, I was the one that was left. Left with a feeling of guilt every time I thought about Mike.

My dreams were no less confusing as I tossed and turned that night. I knew what I should do, and I knew what I wanted to do. I know what I did, and I know it was wrong. I wish I'd known that then.

Mike and I went to see a movie the next evening. He told me he wanted to go somewhere, but Ryan was home sick. Somehow, I doubted Ryan was really sick, but I don't recall whether that was a story Ryan told Mike, or if Mike just made it up to get me to go out with him. It was a date to remember. I call it a date because Mike put his arm around me in the theater, and because it didn't end after the movie.

Dad and Jay were out for the evening. I don't remember where they went, or when they came home, but I knew they wouldn't be home when Mike and I got to the house. I didn't have to invite Mike in. He pushed me into a chair before I could get my jacket off. The boy was horny and you can't tame a horny teenager.

Mike had my pants undone before I could catch my breath, and had my cock in his mouth before I could stop him. But I guess I didn't really want to stop him. It was erect almost instantly, and throbbing as his warm tongue ran across it.

The electric feeling warmed my cold blood and I was helpless as Mike's head bobbed up and down. I could feel every move he made as if he were an extension of my body.

I needed the kind of comfort Mike gave. With Jem, things had been cold since his dad died. Mike was younger, and more eager to please. That's what I was thinking about. And then something clicked. Why was I thinking about Jem when Mike was giving me head? Because it was Jem I really cared about. And as Mike's head sent those warming electric impulses through my dick, I realized that I wasn't just betraying Jem, I was betraying Ryan. And by betraying Ryan, I was betraying Mike. They were all friends to me and I couldn't let that happen.

"Stop," I said as I pushed Mike's head away. He rocked back and looked directly into my eyes.

"You don't like it?" he asked as though I'd hurt his feelings.

"No, it was great. I just.. It's wrong," I said. Mike nodded and left. And there was nothing more to be said. -------------------------------------------------------------------------

Okay so my characters have a little more sense than to sleep around. This would make a great soap opera. Anyway, I know this is the first thing I've written in months. It's been a long year I guess. It's nice to actually write something, though.

When I finished up part 1 of "Aftermath", I really wanted to put Mike and Ben together in a relationship for a while. Later, I decided that it's a bad idea. Mike and Ben won't be having sex any time soon. Jem's still outta town, though and while the cat's away, the mice shall play.

The whole "Aftermath" series is my attempt to relate how Ben's life is without Jem. I'm also gonna try to focus on Jay or Shawn. Did I say that last time? I don't remember. Anyway, if you haven't read all my other stories, check out the page listed below. I should have it up-to-date soon. http://www.fortunecity.com/westwood/lagerfeld/248/ -Paul