Just a Story
WARNING:
This is a story of friendship, commitment, love and trust. It is not a sex story. However, this story deals with love between two male teenagers. If you are offended by stories involving love between two teenage boys, please do not read this story. There may be some sex scenes in this story; however, sex is not the main theme. If you are under age 18 or 21 or it is illegal to read this story where you live, don't read it. Reproducing this story for distribution without the owner's permission is a violation of that copyright.
Just A Story - Chapter 11
Do I have a knack or something? I seem to interrupt guys in the middle of playing with their magic stick, as Fred Downsley, my late husband, used to call it. After a long day at the office I opened the door to the hallway and seeing my son, Paul, with his hand inside his boyfriend's pants is really not the way a mother wants or needs to be greeted.
It was funny though! Poor Charlie! His magic stick was bobbing about and then started erupting as he was frantically trying to stuff it back in his pants. There was no way he was going to accomplish that feat with the size that it was. He was definitely well endowed! He was so embarrassed! I kept a straight face while there, but when I got outside I laughed my head off! I had to call Rebecca!
In case you're wondering, yes, we (meaning Rebecca and I) know the boys love each other and are gay. Does it bother us? Yes and no. Yes, because I worry that there are those who for whatever insane reason might attempt to harm them, because they do not know them or understand them. Funny, I worry more about Charlie, his innocence could be his downfall.
Rebecca and I have become very close, not like the boys, we're just good friends. She poured her heart out to me about her life and how guilty she feels for the way Charlie was abused. She had trusted her ex and Charlie had always been afraid to say anything to her for fear that the ex would hurt her. She told me of the time when Charlie had too much and asked her to kill him. He begged her to kill him so he could die in her arms. What abuse had forced this young man to want to die? Was he mixed up? Yes. Was he insane? Almost.
For a year she had not left his side. Several times she'd tried to get him to see a psychiatrist, but always with little or no result and they all just wanted to drug him, give him a happy pill. In the end she discovered the best therapy was her love and listening to him. Letting him talk about things. They had driven through our town once on the way to New York and he said he liked the place. He didn't know why, he just did and that's how they came to stay here. One day she woke to find him outside standing in the rain. He was soaked, but he was not cold or in danger or upset, he said he just loved the feeling of rain and thought that houses should have showers that were more natural like rain. He said it was like God was washing away all his problems when he stands in the rain.
They had traveled the world that year, staying or going according to whim. Charlie had been afraid to make friends for a long time. But when he and Paul met, she said it was amazing to see the change in Charlie. She says it's like Paul breathed life into Charlie. I know I've never seen Paul happier so I think they are good for each other.
***
I got a call from the school saying that Charlie would be in detention for an hour. He apparently got in a fight with another kid and then cussed out a teacher. I had to smile though. Why? Well, a year ago he would have been a coward and run away. Today he let some kid know he won't be pushed around. It's hard for me to imagine him cussing out a teacher. I arrived at the school just as I saw Charlie and Paul drive away. Charlie didn't look too happy, but I knew Paul would lift his spirits. I really adore Paul. I don't know, the two seem to belong together. Today I received at least five calls from Charlie, all telling me how his class schedule stinks and that he hadn't seen Paul all day! I figured I'd see if I could get their schedules a little more compatible.
Does it bother me that Charlie is gay? No. He's my son and I love him with all my heart. Charlie's real dad was gay, well, really he was bi and he pretended to be straight until one day he told me he was attracted to guys. We were very close. I guess the important thing was that I knew he loved me.I think the day I told him I was pregnant with Charlie was the happiest day of his life. A week later was the next to saddest day of my life; Eddie was killed in an airline crash. His parents were wealthy, but refused to think that their son had gotten a girl pregnant. So, Charlie and I were on our own. I had a knack with buying and selling stocks and then got into buying and selling companies.
I had just arrived home when I received a call from Maggie. She was laughing about walking in on Paul and Charlie. Poor Paul! Caught by his mom with his hands in his boyfriend's pants. I wish I'd been there! After about twenty minutes of girl talk, Charlie got on the phone and asked me to get his gift for Paul. It's not that he's a great poet or writer - it was just the thought and what he was trying to express to Paul in what he wrote that brought tears to my eyes.
***
Charlie liked playing my Dreamcast system. He was pretty good at it, but he quit as soon as he heard Mom ask me if I'd set the table.
"Come on, let's go set the table."
"Not until I get a kiss," I said.
He gave me a quick peck on the cheek.
"What's that?"
"That was your kiss! Come on!"
I pushed out my bottom lip and did my cutest pout. I don't know how I did it, but I managed to squeeze out a tear. It worked, he came running back. Pushed me backwards so I fell on to my bed and climbed on top of me. In an instant his lips found mine in a passionate, extremely passionate kiss!
"I love you…I love making out with you too!" I whispered as he kissed my neck. I was like so hot for him I just wanted to make love; go all the way! Right now!
Mom called out again. Charlie jumped up and went to the door, opened it and said, "Come on, let's go before we make a mess!"
We had a great dinner. Us guys offered to wash the dishes and clean the kitchen. I know Charlie was anxious to give me a gift he'd made for me because we were completely finished in less than fifteen minutes!
"Can I spend the night?"
My heart felt like it skipped a beat and then was racing.
"Yes! Yes! Spend the night! Spend a lifetime! Spend forever and beyond with me!" I said.
We checked with the moms and they gave their consent.
When we got to my room Charlie handed me a CD - Russell Watson - The Voice. I'd never heard of him, but I recognized some of the titles of the music.
"Opera, this is my gift?" I asked, slightly disappointed because opera is not my favorite kind of music.
He smiled, "No, there is a piece on that I think is so beautiful and it will set the mood. Go on, put on the music.
By-the-way, forever and beyond, where did you get that?" he asked.
"You said it to Em and she told me that you told her you would love me beyond forever. It got me thinking - I realized something. You loved me unconditionally. If this lifetime is but a moment of all the lifetimes to come and is but a moment in lifetimes that have been, then love of a person because he or she is a he or a she is so temporary that one could almost call it infatuation, not love. You may think I'm crazy or nuts but I know I have lived before, maybe millions of times, and I feel like I've always known you and that we've been together before. When, where, for how long, I don't remember, but I know, I just know. And I know that I have loved you before, I love you now, and I love you beyond forever."
I turned to look at Charlie and he had tears streaming down his face. I walked over to him and we embraced and we both cried, but this time it was not a sorrowful cry. It was a cry of relief. We both knew, we just knew, we had found each other again. It was a cry of a joyous reunion between two who had lived and loved each other many, many times before. I, no, we know it to be true. You may say 'humbug' like mean old Scrooge; you may say 'prove it's true'. I say prove it's not true!
***
When I am around Paul life just seems to get better. Why? I guess it's just the way we interact. Who cares about the reason anyway?
Have you ever sort of known something to be true in your own heart, in your own reality, but there was just this little bit of doubt that maybe what you knew, what you were feeling was just something you created to make life somehow better. That WAS me and I stress that was me. A few moments ago Paul said something that I could hardly believe he said, "Spend forever and beyond with me". I had to know why he said that and if his, no, if our reality was the same as what I figured out, remembered, thought of, whatever, last night he had experienced too.
When he told me I knew I was right. I knew we were right! I can't express the intense love, the intense joy, the intense relief! The relief that what I knew to be true for me was true for him; that we had actually found each other again!
I felt so good after we finished our cry and so did Paul. We actually ended up laughing and giggling and kissing and hugging. He had told me what I had wanted to hear for so long! And now it was my turn.
I put the CD player on repeat and played track' Saylon Dola'. Why? Because that was the track of music I played over and over as I poured out my feelings on to a parchment.
"Sit," I said to Paul and he sat down on his bed. "Last night, I wrote this for you." I couldn't help smiling, "You can look at it, but I want to read it to you." I handed him the parchment.
"Wow! You did this?" I nodded. "This is incredible, Old Copperscript handwriting! It's so beautiful!"
He kissed me on the cheek. "I'd kiss you on the lips, but then you couldn't read!"
The music played and I began to read aloud what I had written:
Beyond Forever
_
So much sadness has filled my lives
So much sadness that my heart was empty
So much loneliness and so much solitude
An eternity of isolation kept me from you._
_
All my lives I have searched,
I have searched for one such as you
Someone like you who gives me so much love,
A love that will last beyond forever
So much love, my whole life is filled
With the happiness I have found
The happiness which is you._
_
The searching is over,
Over forever over
Because I have found you,
Your friendship, your love, will last beyond forever
In my heart and in my soul
I no longer need to search
For I have found you,
You, who I will always love beyond forever._
I finished reading. I looked into his eyes. The parchment fell from my hands onto the floor…
We kissed and the rest of the night was magical! And that's all you need to know…well, okay, one little bit of data…You know I was wondering if his white stuff tasted like my white stuff…It doesn't…it tastes way better!
Goodnight!
_Footnotes:
What a tease I am! Ha-ha. Well, there you have it - it was Just a Story and all stories come to an end and so has this one. (At least for now) Thanks to Ed, to Jess, and especially to all of those of you who keep telling me I'm a good writer - it helps! LAF, Sam
_
PS: write me at west_fargo@hotmail.com