Welcome to "Lance's Search," a multi-chapter exploration of a young man discovering himself. As much as I would suspect otherwise, I have no actual proof of the sexual orientations of Lance Bass, Justin Timberlake, JC Chasez and any other member of a boy band that might appear in this story. Consequently anything you read in this story is the product of the mind of its author. That said, this story attempts to take a realistic look into the thoughts and feelings of a guy as he discovers the pains and the joys associated with loving his fellow man... or his fellow band mate as the case may be.
If you have any comments, please e-mail them to bjluver@gay.com. Otherwise, enjoy the story.
BJ
Previously on Lance's Search...
The two began kissing. Not the heavy kissing of before, yet just as passionate. After a couple of minutes, JC began to slide out of Lance's ass. With a popping noise, it came out all the way. The two giggled hearing the sound.
"How are you doing?" JC asked.
"Good. Really good. Although there's sort of a feeling of emptiness without you inside me."
JC smiled broadly at his boyfriend. "I think we better clean up a bit, my love."
"Shall we shower together?"
"That sounds like a great idea."
Chapter 35
The telephone beside Lance's bed rang abruptly. One of his hands appeared from beneath the covers and groped around until he found the receiver.
"Hello?" he said in a low and half-asleep voice.
"Hey, Scoop. Good morning to you too."
"Justin?"
"Yeah. Are you still in bed?"
"What time is it?"
"It's after 11 in the morning. This must have been some date last night."
"It was. Really special."
"Do you think JC liked the date?"
"Well, I'd wake him up and ask him, but he looks so contented right now, I'd hate to do that."
Justin started laughing. "Yeah, he hasn't looked that way for quite a while. Maybe you ought to let him sleep for a few days."
"Very funny. Although I wouldn't mind if we both stayed in bed together for a few days."
"My, my, Lance. How you've turned sooo bad. So have you done anything yet?"
"What kind of question is that?"
"One from someone who's dying to know. After all, I already know what kind of underwear you wear."
"Yeah, well tell Larry King all about it."
"So, did you?"
Lance sighed. "Let's just say that if I'm walking funny next time you see me, you'll know why."
Justin practically shouted into the phone. "Oh man, you mean you did it? You're no longer a virgin?"
"Who you talking to, babe?" a voice said from underneath the covers.
"Uhh, say, J, I gotta go. Talk to you later, man."
"K, but don't do anything I wouldn't do," Justin laughed into the phone before hanging up.
"You on the phone?" the voice returned.
Lance pulled down the covers to see his boyfriend. His eyes were barely open, but he smiled once he focused on Lance.
"Hey. Good morning," Lance said followed by a short kiss on JC's lips.
"Morning. Was I dreaming, or were you talking on the telephone?"
"I was on the phone. Justin called. He wanted to know how things went last night," he said absentmindedly. It didn't dawn on him what he said until JC got a weird look on his face.
"What do you mean?"
Lance paused for a moment and mentally said a quick little prayer. This wasn't how he meant to get into the topic.
"Josh, please don't get angry, but Justin knows about us."
"What?" JC said, becoming wide awake now. "Oh my God. How? What does he know? What if he tells the other guys or what if he hates us now or wants us out of the group?"
"Josh, slow down."
"How come you're not worried about this?"
"Because Justin is gay too."
"What?" JC said in a confused manner.
"Justin is gay. It would be rather hypocritical of him to hate us."
"How do you know he's gay?"
"We found out about each other months ago. All quite by accident really. He was the first person I came out to, and frankly, he had to drag me out. I didn't want to admit to it. He had already admitted it to himself. He helped me deal with my being gay."
"But what about Brittany?"
"She knows. He came out to her long before he told me about himself. They are just very good friends. That's all."
"Man, exactly how did I miss that one too?"
"It's like I said before, we were all playing our parts even in front of each other. We didn't know any better."
"Before any more surprises, what about Chris and Joey?"
"As far as I know, they are 100 percent straight."
"Do they know about you, me or Justin."
"Don't think so. We've never talked about it with them. But there is one thing I should tell you that I hope you'll understand."
"What's that?"
"Well... Justin and I fooled around a lot together."
"Fooled around as in?"
"You know, kissing, sucking, hugging, jerking each other off."
"Oh."
Lance sat up now and pulled JC up as well. He had a very serious look on his face. "But what we did last night was my very first time. Justin and I never did it. I didn't want to do it until I fell in love."
"You weren't in love with Justin?"
"No. I love him and always will. But he knew all along that I was in love with someone else."
"And that would be..."
"That would be you. It was Justin who pushed me away from the safety of the relationship we had into the great unknown. He knew I loved you and thought that you might love me too. He cut me off from him. At the time I thought he was being extremely cruel. But after I finally told you, I realized he had given me the best gift of all... the courage to tell you."
"That's what the big blowup on the road was all about?"
"Yeah. It hurt at the time, but I'm so glad he did it."
"Well, I suppose I should thank him too. Without him pushing you, I would've never acted on my feelings toward you. Probably would have ended up an old bitter man."
"Yeah, but you probably would have still had to beat off all the girls."
JC laughed. "Well, I'll still have to beat them off. I'll just have you to help me now."
"You're not angry with me for not telling you earlier?"
"Lance, we only became a couple two nights ago. As much as we already know about each other, there is still so much more to know. I can't fault you for not telling me everything in your past yet. Besides, our future is a lot more important to me than your past."
"I feel the same way. And I can't see anyone else in my future other than you."
"I have to be honest with you. I've been with other guys. But this is different. I didn't love any of them. I love you. They are all in the past now."
Small tears had formed in both sets of eyes. They reached out for each other and embraced tightly, sharing more than the heat of their bodies. They were sharing their minds and emotions. They truly were in love with each other. After a few minutes the embrace turned to kissing. It was passionate, but not lustful kissing. It was the kiss of true love. It was the end of Lance's search and the beginning of a whole new life. But that's another story...
THE END