Left Without Words

By Comicality (Of Blessed Memory)

Published on Mar 20, 2004

Gay

Left Without Words 2

**What's up everybody? Thanks for stopping in to see the next chapter of "Left Without Words", which has been in the works for waaaay too long while I worked on other things. I hope it hasn't been too inconvenient for ya! More is in the works than you can imagine, so stop by the site sometime and be the first to get a glimpse at it! Let me know what you think of this chapter at Comicality@webtv.net or stop by the website at http://comicality.gayauthors.org (Don't forget to sign the guestbook!)


"Left Without Words 2"

**


I could hardly sleep that night. There was this huge rush of unstoppable 'puppy love' that surged through me all night long. The kind of renegade energy that envelops your every thought, every dream, every breath, every step. I was literally up almost an entire half hour before my alarm clock went off. On a SUNDAY, no less! I wanted to make sure that I'd be dressed and all dolled-up for Deme at the restaurant right after the lunch rush had died down a bit. It would be a bit more...you know...intimate. Just him and me....hehehe, I got a giggly feeling inside just thinking the words to myself. That first really big teenage crush...there's nothing like it. You feel like a freshly shaken bottle of carbonated soda, just waiting to burst and overflow with emotions that you can no longer contain. I was so lovey dovey over this boy that I hardly knew what to do with myself. I thought of him every fifteen seconds at least, smiling, thinking about the way his words sounded when he invited me to lunch. To COOK for me, no less. Sighhhh...he was so cute when he said it. And that little accent of his....oh wow....I simply dissolved into a blithering idiot whenever I heard it. It was charming and lovable beyond words. If I closed my eyes, I could still hear him. I never wanted this feeling to end, I could float away and never come down, the way I felt at that moment.

I went to take a shower, making sure to look extra clean for my...um...'engagement'. Hehehe, well, it's not really like a dinner date or something. But it felt like one. I stripped in front of the bathroom mirror, examining myself slightly, even posing a little bit to see how I look from different angles. I matted down my red hair a bit to try to make it not so chaotic. I didn't want it looking messy or anything. At least the shower would take care of some of that. I had a few nearly invisible freckles over my nose, but doubt that Deme would notice. I couldn't do anything about them if he did. My other 'parts' were in order, not too bad. It's not small..I don't think. I haven't seen too many others to compare. But I'm a nice size. Definitely something that Deme could work with if he had to. Um...not that I was going to walk into the restaraunt with my WANG hanging out! But...it was nice to know. In case of emergencies.

I finally climbed into the shower after spinning to take a nice look at my ass in the same mirror. It was tiny. I couldn't help it, I had a tiny ass, and kinda flat at that. But it wasn't bad either. Just....little. Maybe there's some kind of excercise that I can do to make it 'sexier' or something. I should ride my bike more. That'll do it, right? Bike riders and tree climbers have the best asses ever. Um....wait...OK!!! I'm just being stupid now. I should just take my shower and go before I end up thinking about wearing some weird brand of metrosexual make-up to bring out my cheekbones! Blechhh! I'm gay, but I'm not THAT gay!

I felt the warm water gently beading down on my face, closing my eyes and feeling my muscles relax. My mind was freestyling on a plethora of different subjects, my brain flooded with so many thoughts at once that none of them really came to any kind of real clarity. None except for the very vivid images of Dimitry that stayed with me the entire time. Just being there, thinking of him, knowing that I was going to SEE him soon...it was a confusion that I could actually feel physically. My body would actually quake in anticipation, the mere thought of him translating itself into a concrete action that I couldn't escape from. When I concentrated hard enough on him, it felt like he was right there with me. I could feel his presence, hear his sweet voice, smell the subtle humanity of his breath, see his face glowing with the most beautiful smile that I've ever been exposed to. It was so real that I could feel myself getting uncontrollably hard in the shower. Shit...it was going to be a problem all damn DAY if I didn't take care of it. It almost felt wrong to think of Deme that way. To just use him for a jack off session and be done with it. Somehow, the few precious moments that he spent as a part of my life seemed much more important than that. Something inside of me wanted to put him on a pedestal above the nameless, faceless, personality deficient, cuties that I see in the mall or on tv that I lust over so endlessly. Deme was so much better than that in my mind. He was like this uncensored manifestation of love in a form that I could appreciate and care for whenever I brought him to mind. It was almost like owning a piece of him through my own memories...when, in truth, it was Deme that owned a piece of me. Inspiring infatuated visions of himself through my love starved mind. God...it felt so good to be trapped in his enchanting embrace.

Standing in that shower, I let my imagination flirt with light touches of his smile. Nothing more than a few flashes of his eyes. That alone was enough to get me hard. A part of myself kept telling me that I shouldn't be doing this. That I should just think of somebody else and leave Deme out of my mental 'perv account'. But the images only got stronger, and once I touched myself, no one else seemed to do the trick. Deme was the only boy on my mind. I could almost feel his arms wrap around me as I imagined the feel of the warm water were his light fingerprints, touching me all over my body. I was so stiff that it hurt, and I had to relieve myself at this point. There was no stopping the process now. I held onto it, bending it downward a bit to prepare for action, and started to stroke tenderly as Deme flooded my mind. Wow....his kisses were so gentle, his hands were so soft, his lips were so determined...I did my best to tame my thoughts a little bit, but once I passed the point of no return, my mind went to acts of sensual passion that wouldn't be contained. Tongues licking, lips sucking, hands roaming, fingers probing, bodies twisting......it didn't take long.

I splashed my fluids all over the shower curtain, my knees rattling with weakness, holding back my gasps and whimpers so that no one walking past the bathroom could hear them. The orgasm was so strong that my vision actually blurred, and it took me a minute or two to get my eyes focused again. Geez! If Deme can have that effect on me without him even BEING here, imagine what he could do in person! I cleaned up and all once I felt my body relax, and then stepped out of the shower to get dressed. The rush was so strong that I was still trembling when I put my boxers on. I certainly hope that that mindblowing experience will help to keep 'Little Shane' from getting me into trouble this afternoon. I'll be a lot more at ease without being so...um....loaded.

Getting dressed was a whole other ordeal. Making sure my colors matched, making sure my colors matched my eyes, making sure my hair didn't look like shit, trying to look dressed up without looking like I TRIED to dress up. It's times like these that I envy the people who don't give a fuck how they look. I never did. Then again, I never had anyone to 'model' for before. Then I went downstairs, making sure that I skipped any kind of random snack food on the way out the door. Just a glass of orange juice and a half packet of breath mints. Afterall, my baby is cooking me lunch today. Hehehe, 'my baby', yeah right.

Every step that I took in the direction of that restaurant made my heartbeat double in speed. It was fun at first, experiencing that wonderful feeling of nervous twitches and spontaneous grins. It felt like the answers to every dull moment, every lonely moment, every terrifying question...was all wrapped up in one beautiful package. And I was finally heading in its direction. But...as the distance between myself and my house got longer...and the distance between me and my 'day date' with Deme got closer...that happy feeling got much much worse. It turned cold all of the sudden. Doubt crept in. Fear. I could literally feel my steps getting more awkward and lopsided by the second. My hands felt like they were HUGE, and didn't have a place on my body anywhere. My hair felt wrong, my clothes felt wrong, my voice felt wrong...it was as if I was physically falling to pieces as I prepared to stand in the shadow of greatness. My mouth went dry as I got ready to cross the street and go in through the front door. My palms were sweating, and I had to wipe them off on my pants legs to keep them from being drenched and clammy when I saw him. My lungs seemed to only hold a fraction of the amount of air that they usually did, and the pit of my stomach constricted itself into a tight knot. This seemed like such a good idea before I actually GOT here.

I was thankful that the traffic was enough to delay me from crossing the street for a few seconds. But once I saw a break in the string of cars from both directions, I knew it was time to either straighten up and try to make a go of this....or run screaming in the other direction and create an excuse that will buy me enough time to gather some courage. What if he hated me? What if he liked me? What if he only likes me because he doesn't know me, and then hated me once he found out what I was like? What if he likes me, but isn't gay, and I'm stuck with a 'friend' that I can never have? The spinning cyclone of questions is enough to drive you crazy if you let them. Because...bottom line...not a single one of them can be answered until you take that first step forward. So...

...Looking both ways for the break...I took that first step forward. I walked up to Milo's front door.

Deme's miraculous form was the first thing that caught my eye as I walked in from outside. He was ringing up someone at the register for their take out dinner, his head slightly down to look at the keys on the register. He was wearing black slacks and a black short sleeved t-shirt, covered by a gleaming white apron that looked like he had just bought it less than ten minutes ago. So clean, with the fold marks still in it. I just sorta stood there to let my eyes focus on him completely for a moment while he wasn't looking. Sighhhh...wow...as scary as it was to even be NEAR him, it was always worth the terror that it took to get there. Just to stare lovingly at his dreamy features through the soft see-through curtain of dark hair that would gently cascade gently downward into his eyes everytime he leaned forward. Look at his smooth fingers, his hands, his shoulders, his neck, his lips...wow. Just letting my hand rest on his chest would be more excitement than I could handle. My whole body came to life, every inch of me seemingly wanting to scatter in different directions before he saw me. But it REALY went haywire when the man at the counter walked away with his food and Deme looked up to smile in my direction. I'm surprised that I was still able to breathe.

"Shane...good. I'm glad you came." His smile was blinding, his voice as light and pleasant as ever. He walked around the counter to greet me and I felt a momentary panic rush through me. Almost as if I was afraid of him touching me...even though his touch would be everything I've ever wanted in this world. I don't think I was scared of HIM really. It was more like being scared of the loss of all control that he caused in me whenever he was close. It almost caused me to jump back.

I reached out a hand to shake, but he HUGGED me instead! I think I might have gasped outloud in surprise, and I hoped he didn't feel me tense up so suddenly. It just...it caught me by surprise. It was a simple, friendly hug, and only lasted a few quick seconds. But to me it felt like an hour. My insides were turning to mush and I could feel my heartbeat begin to race. He smelled soooo good. He had this sweet scent, like warm fresh baked bread, mixed with that boyish aroma that only the most gorgeous creatures on Earth seem to possess. By the time he let me go, I was twice as insane over him as I was before.

"Come in. I am learning everything today, cooking, register, everything. More than just cleaning." He said. He seemed to be in a cheerful mood, and it lifted the tone of voice just slightly...making it even more angelic than before. His Grecian accent was so addictively cute. I could listen to him talk for hours. He could read names out of a PHONE BOOK and I'd be swooning. "Have a seat. I will get you a menu, k?"

"Yeah..." I nodded. When he turned around to grab some menus from behind the counter, I felt myself let out a huge sigh of relief. Probably the same breath that I had been holding since the hug he gave me. Ok Shane...so far, so good. Just...maintain some form of normality for right now, and we'll...we'll figure out a way to say something somewhat intelligent by the end of the day.

He came back with a menu to give me, and then sat interested at the other side of the table. I tilted the menu down a bit to look over the top, and Deme was watching me with a grin. He was so anxious to cook something for me, hehehe, I couldn't help but smile myself. "You look like you're enjoying this already." I said.

"Yes, well, I need more practice. I want to make something good for you."

"Like what?"

"I don't know. What do you want me to cook?" He asked.

"Hehehe, I don't know. Me and my mom always get the same stuff when we come in." I was starting to reach a moment of normality here. A level where I could stop being so damn lovestruck for a few heartbeats and put a sentence together without tripping over my own tongue. But it was an unstable reality. Looking him in the eye for even a split second was enough to weaken the barriers around my ability to hide my infatuation. "Um...geez..." I said, feeling a blush come to my cheeks.

"What is it?"

"I can't...really pronounce half of this stuff." The moment I said it, I heard Deme's chair scoot back a little, and he stood up to walk around to my side of the table. I watched him, and that weird panic came back to me again, threatening to rattle me to pieces. He stood behind my chair and leaned down to look at the menu with me. My breath got caught up in my throat, and I could feel my chest trembling like a cold puppy.

"Which ones? I will help you." His head was over my shoulder, his face was right next to mine, almost cheek to cheek. Oh God...I am totally LOSING it here!

"Um...well...uhhh..." I wasn't even LOOKING at the menu! I was too busy trying to see as much of Deme as I could out of the corner of my eye. I don't think I've ever been this close for this long. "..how...how about this one?" I said, pointing to a random selection on the menu.

"Keftedes?" He said, accent perfect.

"Um...yeah." I mumbled, turning my head to look at his face. He was so close, his smooth cream colored skin, his soft lips...I had only taken a glance when he turned his head. Our eyes only met for a half second and I looked back at the menu as quickly as possible. "Sure...that one. What is it?"

"Balls." He said.

"What???"

"Meatballs. Deep fried." He answered. Okaaaay, so maybe that wasn't the best 'random' choice on the menu. "Are you sure? I can cook something harder than that."

"Well...I don't know." I was trying to catch my breath. If only he knew how much inner activity was going on inside me at that very moment. I don't know HOW I was able to function at all through it. "Why don't you pick something?" I said, and his chocolate brown eyes glided over to meet mine, his charming smile spreading slightly wider on his face.

"Do you like chicken?" We were almost face to face, eye contact and all, and I could feel my emotions being tugged roughly in his direction.

"Yeah....I...I like chicken." I could smell a hint of his shampoo carried by the silken locks of his hair. And could almost see my reflection in his wonderous eyes, which had this effortless beauty that has to be seen to be believed.

"Ok, then I will make you chicken. I have a recipe in mind. It is my father's. K?" He said.

"Uh huh..." I nodded timidly. So lost in his eyes that I couldn't find the power to turn away from them. Not even for normality's sake.

"Good. I will start it now." Deme said, and hs head disappeared from over my shoulder as he stood back up. He had NO idea what he was doing to me, and the innocent charm of that fact only made me want him more. "I will be back." He went behind the counter and went into the back towards the kitchen. There I was, left alone, quivering with a crush that was forever tightening it's grip on me. I didn't DARE let my thoughts wander to sex! I'd be done for sure if I did that! Besides, while he was standing in front of me, any sexual thoughts would have only succeeded in making me miss one of the little details of Deme that my heart was so desperately searching for. I have NEVER felt like this before in my life. It's so strange, but I'm loving every minute of it.

The time that I spent sitting there by myself, I spent trying to occupy my mind before the doubts and the fears crept back in. I wouldn't be beyond running out of that restaurant before Deme came back. Of that I was sure. So I twiddled my thumbs, kept myself balanced, and waited for him to come back. That's when I saw Milo come out of the kitchen. "Shane! My boy, how are you?"

"Great, Milo. How about you?"

"Ahh, I'll be alright. You know Dimitry is learning to cook now. So I have to watch every minute. It is a headache. He wants to cook everything, this boy. Now he begs me to let him fill all of the orders for me. I can't cook anything myself anymore, he won't let me." Milo said, grabbing a washcloth to wipe off the tables around me. "I suppose Deme took your order already?"

"Yeah." I answered. "Actually, he's cooking lunch for me today."

"You SEE? I tell you, that boy has gone 'chef crazy'! He'd cook for the whole Roman ARMY if he had a chance. Well, I hope you like it. He's a bit 'new' at it." He laughed a bit, a hazy smoker's laugh, and rubbed me on the top of my head with a smile as he walked into the back again.

Deme came back out shortly afterwards and sat across from me. I was determined to not make a fool of myself, so I tightened up my stomach and tried hard to 'ground' myself. "Ok, I start it already. I know you will like it. Is very good." He used his fingertips to brush some of his hair out of his eyes in the most adorable way possible, and smiled in my direction. I was already beginning to melt again.

"So...are you liking it here so far?" I asked. That was 'normal' enough, right?

"Yes, very much. It's very quiet here. Not like my old neighborhood. Much noise, all the time."

"Ahhh...well......good." I was already running out of stuff to say when Milo called Deme from the kitchen.

"Deme! You have to keep an eye on what you are cooking. You cannot leave it to burn."

"Papa, it's ok. I am watching."

"How are you watching when you are in the other room?"

"I am talking to my friend." He said, and my ears perked up immediately. Awww, he called me his friend. My heart was soaring.

"It is going to burn if you leave it to sit." Milo wasn't going to let it go, and I could see Dimitry give in with an annoyed roll of his eyes. Even when he was pouty he was cute. But his smile returned pretty swiftly as he stood up from the table.

"I am sorry, Shane. I have to go back and take care of your lunch. I'll be RIGHT back though, ok? Don't go anywhere." He said, and all I could do was nod and promise that I wouldn't move. I watched him as he walked into the back, his fluent Greek trading shots back and forth with Milo as they further 'discussed' the situation. I think it might have taken me a few seconds to let it sink in....but then I thought to myself...wow...Deme was trying to spend time with ME. That thought truly made me smile.

He came back out moments later, peeking around the corner, "Do you want something to drink, Shane?"

"Ok."

"Mountain Dew. Yes?"

He remembered. "Mountain Dew...sure." He looked around, like he was sneaking out of the kitchen again, and grabbed me a glass with some ice, and a can of soda. Then he ran over and brought it to me. "It won't take too long. I'll cook it fast for you, but good." I smiled up at him and he smiled back. That's when Milo called him back and he hurried back into the kitchen. By this time, my knees were knocking under the table and I was trying hard not to giggle to myself. How can I not be in love with this boy? How can anybody not be totally in love with this boy? He was amazing, he was cute, he was sweet....yeah....yeah, that's a bit too good to be true. Isn't it?

It was at that point, that I could feel my giddy little grin fade a bit, falling almost into a frown. What if he has somebody? I mean, he MUST have a girlfriend somewhere! They must have been a few sexual impulses short of RAPING him in his old neighborhood. Even if he didn't like girls and was 100% gay...there's no WAY that another gay boy would have passed that up! Not in a million years! I'd tell the whole damn WORLD I was gay on the six o'clock news if it meant being with a beauty like Dimitry! So...whether he's straight or gay...neither one means he's available. He writes POETRY for god sakes, they'd go crazy over that! Oh God...what happens if I've made the mistake of getting all gaga over somebody else's boyfriend. Arrrgh!

"It's not cold enough?" He was standing right over my shoulder again, I hadn't even heard him enter the room again.

"The soda? No, no...it's fine." I tried organizing my thoughts back in order. Maybe I can find out. I know it's gonna hurt to hear that he has somebody, but even if I only have a one percent chance...it's better than nothing. "So....." I started, and it caught his attention. Exactly how am I gonna ask him THIS particular question? Should I just draw a picture of a penis and a vagina on the placemat and tell him to point to one? Somehow that doesn't seem like the most 'tactful' answer to me. "...Did you register for school yet?" Good save. Cowardly and completely off topic, but good.

"No, not yet. I will go in tomorrow to get the paperwork to fill out. I'm not too anxious, however. I like my days off."

"Yeah, I can imagine. So...." Ok, Shane, let's find a way to bring this around to the all important question. Not too fast, but let's just see what we can find out without really saying anything here. "...Aren't you gonna miss your old school?"

"A little, maybe. Some of my old frends will keep in touch, but the rest I will have to leave behind." He said, then adding, "And I will really miss Samantha. I hope she will come to visit sometime. You would like her."

And that was it. The nail in the coffin. I did my best to not look disappointed, but I could almost feel my heart deflating right there in front of him as the words left his mouth. "Oh...is she your girlfriend?" I mumbled.

Deme gave me a strange look. Then after a slight pause, he smiled. "No. No she is not my girlfriend." I wonder if he knew that I was trying to 'feel him out' with that question. "Samantha used to read my poetry and give me criticism. She was my writing partner, I guess." His almond brown eyes looked at me for a quick moment longer, not blinking, when Milo called him again.

"Deme! Are you talking again? You have to turn off the noodles before the water runs over into the stove." Deme stood up with a smile.

"Coming, Papa." And this time he walked back to the kitchen, taking a glance or two over his shoulder. Shit...did I blow it? He knows, doesn't he? 'Oh...is she your girlfriend?' What kinda STUPID ass question is that to ask another boy? What am I, mentally deficient? Stupid! He's probably back there laughing at my awkward attempts to figure him out. Sighhh...way to go, Romeo.

He didn't come back out of the kitchen for the next ten minutes or so. The whole time, my mind reeling with thoughts of what he must be thinking of me at that very moment. By the time he had come out with my lunch on a tray, I was almost at the point of sneaking out and never coming back. "Ta daaa! Lunch is served." He said.

It was a little burned on the edges, but still looked pretty good. Chicken and pasta, not bad at all. "Cool. It looks great, Deme."

"I hope you like." He said, and then watched as I cut a piece to take my first bite. It smelled good, it looked, and the taste....the taste...? You know those involuntary wrinkled up faces you make when you taste something that's 'not so great'? Yeah, well I nearly sprained every muscle in my head trying to hold those faces back. Not that it was AWFUL, mind you...just not...well it wasn't...ok it was awful. Hehehe! But I'll be damned if I tell HIM that. "You like?" He asked.

It was salty and bitter, but that didn't stop me from smiling wide and saying..."Mmm-Hmm. It's....pretty good." I tried to chew it up and swallow it down as fast as I could to spare my tastebuds the prolonged torture. And I even cut up another small piece to further prove that I liked it, drowning the flavor out with a mouthfull of the noodles. Which were all stuck together in one big clump. Still, the smile on his face was reward enough for biting into it.

"Good! It is my first time making this one."

"Really?" I said with my mouthfull and reaching for my Mountain Dew before the salt choked me to death. "I can't tell."

"If you like, I can bring you soup or something?"

"No no...this is fine. Really." I assured him, and he walked back into the kitchen with a smile. I looked down at the plate, and immediately thought of places to hide the rest of this food. Under the table, in a few hundred little napkins, hell...I'd shovel it all into my SHOE and walk out with it if I thought he wouldn't notice. Unfortunately, he came out again before I could think of a plan. He sat across from me again, and we talked...while I finished every last bite. Note to self...Deme and I go ELSEWHERE to eat from this day forward.

I finished my meal, and as a few more customers came in, filling up a two or three of the tables in the restaurant to eat, and constant take out orders being called in, I saw Deme getting busy. He tried to sit down and talk to me, but he had to answer the phone and ring on the register and check on the other tables. I didn't want to get him distracted. And I CERTAINLY didn't want him to offer to make me dessert! So I decided that I should wrap this up. "You guys are getting busy now, huh?"

"Yes, a little bit. But it's no problem."

"Just get back to work, slacker." I joked. "Throw me the check and I'll be out of your hair."

"No check."

"What? Come on..." I said, reaching in my pocket.

"No no no...no check. It was 'practice'. And it was special something...for my new friend, Shane." He said, and despite the taste of salt in my mouth, shriveling my tongue up like a prune, I felt myself become a big blob of gelatin again right in front of him.

"O-o-ok...thanks...Deme..." I knew I was blushing. There was no way to stop it now. I paused, not knowing what else to say. I was looking into his eyes, and they were practically beaming back at me. I was a deer in headlights. He could tell I was stuck for words, because it looked like he was really waiting for me to say something. "I...I should get going."

"You are leaving, then?" He said.

"Um...yeah. I'm gonna go. But, we'll talk soon, ok?"

"Ok. I will see you soon then." And he walked over to give me another hug. A bit tighter than last time, his young muscles holding me closer to him than ever before. This time, my mind was able to absorb even more of the affectionate embrace.

"Later." I said, backing up and heading towards the door in a dreamy stupor. "Thanks for lunch." I waved a little, and saw him go back to work as I left. I couldn't help but watch him through the window as I walked past it. This time, though...he looked up in time to catch me. It startled me enough to almost make me stumble out into traffic just to get away from him. I'm SO damn goofy! What, am I gonna KILL myself now? Stupid. I gathered my senses and crossed the street without looking back this time. I wasn't sure exactly what I was going to do next, but this was a lot more than I expected. And a lot faster too. I kinda thought it would take me months of tension, chickenhearted antics, and regret, before I could even get Dimitry to TALK to me! That would almost be preferable. Because I'd have time to move in slowly and do this the 'safe' way. Now I feel like I'm jumping in blindfolded and hoping there's some water in the pool beneath me.

Still, whether I survive the 'landing' or not...the freefall downward is pure bliss. Pure bliss.

I got home, opening the backdoor and hoping for some privacy. But I could hear Britney Spears blasting loudly out of my sister's room. Wonderful. So much for having quiet time to reflect. I went to her room and saw her friends Stephanie and Amy sitting on her bed, bouncing away to the music. "Do you girls think you can turn that down a little bit?"

"Wait til after this song." Sarah said.

It wasn't worth the battle, so I just figured, 'whatever', and walked to the bathroom to brush some of that salty chicken out of my teeth. But when I had gotten the toothbrush out and looked at myself in the mirror, I got this little painful jab right in the heart of my self confidence. Just looking at myself, the freckles, the red hair, it was all so different from the image I had seen this morning. Sighhhh....love. It's one of those confidence crushing 'boogie men' that brings even your smallest insecurities to the surface and magnifies them by infinity. It's just something you have to ignore sometimes. I don't even know if I should be using the word 'love' at this point. It didn't feel like it was a word that I should use considering everything was happening so fast. This was just a crush. A great, big, fat, stupid crush. And I'll get over it soon, and then be able to work on the whole 'love' thing later. Hopefully with a little more skill.

I spent the next two hours in my room, trying to mentally block out Sarah's music. Which, by the way, was turned down by a FRACTION of a decibel from last time. So it's not like it helped. Still, I should have welcomed the distraction from my thoughts. I think too much anyway. But believe me, you have no idea how many times a female 7th grader can giggle and scream in a five minute period alone. And if you multiply that by three, my sister and her friends were driving me up a wall and they weren't even in the ROOM! It was a blessing when I heard the doorbell ring. If nothing else, it got me a few feet further away from my sister's music for a few seconds.

I walked over to the door and opened it...not at ALL prepared to see Deme standing outside the screen door. I didn't even have TIME to panic. "Hey..."

"You don't mind that I came by? I didn't know how to call you first." He said.

"No..." The only reason that I was able to think of inviting him in was because the screen door was filtering out some of that infinite beauty that I was so hungry to see again. So I opened the door and asked him in.

I guess he was done working for the day, holding his apron folded up in his arms, and two of his notebooks, with pens slid into the spiral binding of them at both ends. "I am off work, I thought I might come by and apologize for earlier."

"Apologize? For what?"

"Papa tells me I am not such a good cook. We had some...'complaints' today." He blushed with a smile. "But he is training me to be better. I hope I did not poison you too badly." I didn't know what to say. "It wasn't that bad, was it?"

"Bad? No way. It was...um..." I tried not to look him in the eye. "...very eatable."

He looked directly at me, and giggled a bit to himself. "You lie."

"No, really..." Give it up, Shane. You've been caught.

"Yes. You lie. But is very sweet." We stood there for a moment, and had the cutest bashful habits of anyone that I had ever known. Then he brushed his hair back a little and said, "I will make it up to you some other way, sometime. We'll go out somewhere and have fun. My treat."

"Sounds like a plan."

"Besides, you said you would show me around, remember?" He said softly.

"I said that?"

"You said that. Yes."

"Well...then I guess I should keep my word, huh?" How hard was I blushing? He's blushing, am I worse off than he is? This is too cool! We're talking and smiling and...wow, I feel like I'm gonna explode!

"Papa suggested that, maybe since we are going to the same school, I could go with you tomorrow when I get papers to register. I wanted to come by and ask you."

"Um...sure...I usually ride my bike over in about five minutes time from here." I told him. But I'd ride extra slow, or even WALK, if I had Dimitry beside me. "Do you have a bike?"

"I have one, yes."

"Cool. Well, I'll wait for you tomorrow morning then. I promise you, I'm NOT gonna leave without ya." Boy, was THAT ever the truth.

"Good. It is settled then."

Just then, I heard a blast of music fill the hallway, and my sister's friend Stephanie came out of the bedroom to grab some juice from the fridge. She walked past the living room, hardly noticing that there were two bodies in the room instead of one. But when she caught a glimpse of Deme, she did a double take. Her eyes screamed open. You would have thought Aaron Carter was in the house the way she reacted. I think she was trying to contain herself, but 12 year old girls, obviously, aren't very good at it.

Deme softly said, "Hello."

"Hi....." Stephanie said, eyes still wide. "Excuse me for a minute." And then she practically ran into the bedroom and slammed the door shut. Hehehe, don't worry Steph...I know the feeling.

"My sister's friends...psh!"

"Ah, yes...Sarah. Right?"

"Yeah. She's just having some friends over today, and it's not worth the effort to toss them out. Usually they...." But before I could finish, the door to Sarah's room opened again, and all three of them came out like a troop of soldiers. Pretending to go to the fridge at the same time, but looking hard around the corner to see this fancy young man that Stephanie had 'reported' back to them about. I was embarrassed beyond belief.

"Hiiii..." They all said in unison, giggling right afterwards. I shot her a dirty look, but she was too instantly infatuated to care.

Sarah walked up to Deme and stuck out a hand, "I'm Sarah. I'm Shane's sister." She whimpered nervously, her smile gleaming as brightly as it possibly could.

"Sarah, yes. Hello. I brought you cookies the other day. Milo always says to send them special for you." He shook her hand, and I saw all three girls simultaneously sway with an enamored blush. Amy had to practically hold herself up on the wall, her braces almost blinding me with the reflection of the light.

"Hehehehehehehe......thank you." Sarah was reduced to jello, and pulled her hand back and backed up against the wall.

"Omigod..." Stephanie whispered, and with a few more seconds of gawking at him, they all said 'bye' and huddled back into their room. But not before hearing Steph faintly yell out, "I love you!" That caused them all to burst out laughing and they sprinted back in the room, slamming the door behind them.

Deme used his hand to cover his face a little bit and chuckled timidly. "Deme, I'm sorry dude. My sister's an idiot." I said.

"Don't worry. It is ok. She is very sweet too." He said. "I will see you tomorrow then, yes?"

"Eight AM."

"I will be here." Just then, Amy came out of the bedroom with her digital camera, and took a surprise picture of us! The flash was like the brightest thing I've ever seen in my LIFE at that moment. The other two girls were peeking around the corner, and laughed out loud as soon as the pic was snapped. I was ready to chase them all down and beat the shit out of them!

"Dammit...SARAH!!!" I shouted as they made a hasty retreat back into their room. "KNOCK IT OFF!!!" I couldn't believe them!

"I feel like a rock star now." Dimitry's blush and shy laugh was so adorable, and he was handling all of this extremely well. "I am going home. I have to help my father finish setting up the house a bit more. And next weekend we are going to paint the last room. It should be done soon." Then he said, "When it is finished, maybe you will come over?"

"I'd like that." I said, my heart fluttering again. I must admit, this conversation thing was getting easier. Not by MUCH, mind you...but easier.

"Good. I will see you later, k?" And he gave me ANOTHER hug! God, his hugs were getting so addictive. Holding him, his head on my right shoulder...it was so cool. Then, he leaned back a bit, looked at me, and hugged me again. This time resting his chin on my other shoulder. I was on the verge of a heart attack at this point. "Bye, Shane."

"Bye..." I squeaked, my voice cracking from the pressure on my already rattled nerves. "Ahem...I mean...bye." He grinned and walked out with a wave.

I shut the door behind him, growing a bulge in my pants for seemingly no reason at all. Not even from the slightest sexual thought, it was just touching him that had done it. And I nearly jumped in the air a foot when the door to Sarah's room burst open yet AGAIN, and they came pouring into the room to watch Deme leave. I turned slightly away from them to hide my excitement, but I doubt they were paying me any attention. The crushed themselves against the window, trying to see my fantasy boy walk away. All I could hear was, 'Omigod', and 'He's soooo cute', and 'Did you hear his accent?', and 'Aww, don't go. Come back'. All this between girlish giggles and nearly orgasmic sighs and whimpers.

Sarah turned around, "What's his name?"

"You guys...I swear..." I said, frustrated at them for being so shameless.

"Come ON, Shane! Just tell me his name!" That of course led to a chorus of all three of them chanting it over and over again until I told them.

"It's DIMITRY! Alright? You HAPPY now???"

"Dimitry....sighhh...."

"Deme, for short." I told them, and that only made it worse.

"Deme...omigod, that's so cute! Deme..." Sarah said.

Amy chirped in with, "I think I'm in love!" And it was around that time that I had had enough. I just shook my head and walked away while they sat around and 'girl talked' their way around Deme's every alluring feature and enchanting aura. I shut the door to my room and turned the music on. I was hoping to block out some of their cries and giggles. I was hoping that I wouldn't have to hear ANY of it. But...deep down inside, I guess I was jealous. Really jealous. Because they got to be so open about it. Because they got to swoon in public and make an ass out of themselves without being seen as 'abnormal'. Because....they got the chance to show Deme that they were interested. Something about that just cut me up inside. It really did. Adding a sprinkle of depression to my aggrivation.

It looks like the boy of my dreams has a fan club. A pathetically, hopelessly, unbelievably lost fan club. And you know what the sad part is?

I'm probably twice as lost as they are.


I hope you liked the second chapter to this story, and will come back for the third sometime in the near future. I am so happy that you guys have been enjoying the website, signing the guestbook, and participating on the boards and all! Thank you! Feel free to drop me a line and let me know what you think at Comicality@webtv.net or stop by the website at http://comicality.gayauthors.org and visit us! Kewl? Seezya!

Next: Chapter 3


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