Maze of Moments

DISCLAIMER, AND GREETINGS! Hey, that time again! This is fiction, made up, not real. I don't know N'Sync, although they look like a fun bunch of guys, and nothing of what you are about to read should imply anything about them and their sexuality. Okay? While most of the locations in the Maze of Moments series are real, a few were made up here and there so that the story could progress.

Thank you for staying with me, and to many of you, special thanks for the kind words. The last couple of months have been hectic, to say the least, and there is still a long road ahead. Know that I appreciate your sentiments, and my family and I are grateful for your prayers.

If all of the above confuses you, then I encourage you to join the NEW Kevin and Lance update group at Yahoo! Point yer browser to groups.yahoo.com/Kevin_Lance and be one of the few, the proud, the K&L fans! And while you're at it, don't forget to pay a visit to Railwayshoes.net, the home of Maze and many other great stories!

Comments, questions, and sums of cash should be sent to KandLStories@aol.com!

Once again, the following chapter contains material that may be upsetting to some readers. Discretion is advised.

Thanks for waiting and reading...now, on with the show!

--Tony

The Maze of Moments - A Kevin and Lance Story

Chapter 20 - Dies Irae ('Day of Wrath')

Part Four - Darkening Skies

"Sometimes, even music cannot substitute for tears."

-- from "The Cool, Cool River" by Paul Simon

Across America on this Thursday night, many families sat glued in front of their televisions, watching one favorite program or another. Usually, it was the networks that garnered this attention, and one in particular whose motto for the past several seasons came to be known as "must see tv." Still, there were others that preferred to surf the channels on cable systems, and some of them found themselves watching an unfolding story on the three news channels.

Terry Reid was one such individual.

He had just walked into his small apartment near the campus of Mississippi State. The night had been a success, no doubt about it, and he was happy to have played a part in it, regardless of how small it had been. It took a lot of hard work, and Lance had been pleased with the final results. That was all that mattered.

Picking up the remote, he turned on his television, and began flipping through the stations. It was the words of an anchor on MSNBC that caught his attention:

"...this is Brian Williams at the MSNBC news desk, and we're interrupting our regular coverage to bring you a breaking story out of Jackson, Mississippi, where tonight firefighters are battling a huge church fire in that town. Adding a whole new dimension to this story is an unconfirmed report, stating that there are children trapped inside this structure, as well as, and again we need to stress that this is totally unconfirmed, two members of the hugely popular music group N'Sync."

Terry looked at the screen in shock.

"This is coming on the heels of a suspicious fire just about two weeks ago, in the same area. Many of you may be aware of the fact that tonight, a concert was held by N'Sync to raise money for the congregation of that church. Again, information is sketchy, and still unconfirmed. We're going to try to speak to our affiliate in Jackson here shortly, and hopefully get some more information on this situation..."

The color drained from his face as the enormity of what Brian Williams was talking about slowly began to sink in.

N'Sync.....fire.....members trapped..... Lance.

Terry dropped the remote, grabbed his keys, and was back out the door.

"Hey, come on over here.... sit down."

Kevin smiled and walked in the direction of familiar voice.

"What's up man? What're you doing here?"

Eric smiled at his long time friend.

"Not much. Have a seat, join me. You want a coffee or something?" he asked.

"Nah, I'm good," Kevin said as he pulled out the chair and sat down. "So...what are you doing here, anyway?"

"Don't you ever take off those sunglasses? I mean, come on Kev...we are inside, you know," Eric said with a grin.

"Hey, it's my style, what can I say?"

"Kev, you have no style."

Kevin laughed along with his roommate.

"Yeah, yeah.... whatever! But anyway.... Eric, what're you.... what're we doing here?"

"Kev.... I've got to go."

In a spacious apartment located in the Gold Coast area of Chicago, Chad Douglas opened the door to his room, kicked off his tennis shoes, and sat heavily on the bed.

Summer had just begun, the last summer before he went to college, and already he was bored. There were only so many games of basketball one could play with ones friends, or lazy afternoons spent on the beach, or intense workouts done in a weight room. Further, an eighteen year old could only spend so much time working as a runner for the family business before that would bore him to tears.

'Maybe I could convince mom and dad to let me road trip or something,' the young man thought to himself as he ran a hand through his sandy colored hair.

Picking up a remote control, he turned on the TV set and immediately changed the channel to MTV.

What he saw came as a shock, to say the least.

".... Kurt Loder with an MTV News special report on the fire in Jackson, Mississippi that apparently involves members of N'Sync, who held a concert tonight in that same town for another church that burned recently. MTV has learned that the members of N'Sync are in no danger, but it is in fact two members of the band that opened for them, Dubious Distinction, that reportedly are trapped in the building. A spokesman for Jive Records told us that they..."

Chad stiffened, and the hairs on the back of his neck stood up.

Dubious Distinction.

Kevin.

"MOM! DAD!" he cried as he ran out of the room.

"What do you mean you have to go?" Kevin asked as he took off his sunglasses and set them down.

"I have to go," Eric shrugged, taking a sip of his coffee.

"Go.... where? I don't understand."

"You don't have to. It's okay, though. Don't worry.... well, don't worry too much at least. Okay? You're going to be fine. You and Lance."

"What does Lance have to do with this? E, you want to try explaining this to me? I'm a little confused here...."

"I know...it'll all make sense soon, though. I promise. I just wanted to make sure you were okay before I left. That's all."

"Well, why wouldn't I be okay?"

"You sure you don't want that coffee?"

Across the country, Britney Spears thanked her audience one last time, waved, and ran offstage as the lights came on. The encore finished, she could now safely retreat to her dressing room area, where she could shower, change clothes, and get ready for the next stop on this whirlwind tour. As she wiped her sweaty face with a towel handed to her by a stagehand, a member of the tour personnel ran up urgently, a look of horror on her face.

"Brit... sweetie...you need to come with me, right away."

"Why? What's wrong Donna?" Britney replied as she gratefully took a bottle of water from the same stagehand that had given her the towel.

"You just.... you have to come with me. I need to tell you something. Now."

"What is it? What happened?"

Donna looked around and leaned over, whispering into Britney's ear.

A look of surprise, then shock, then dismay came over Britney's face.

"Oh my God.... oh no....is he.... is it? Justin?"

"We don't know yet...come on, Johnny is waiting for you to call."

Britney dropped the water and the towel, and ran off to her dressing room.

"Now, I want you to know that this isn't your fault. I don't blame you for any of it. You just did what you felt you had to do, that's all. No hard feelings, okay?"

Kevin, more than a little bewildered, simply nodded his head.

"You have to remember that. No matter what.... you didn't do this, you're not responsible any more than I am. I don't want you to beat yourself up over it."

"Right. Of course not," Kevin replied.

"Just go on with things....go forward. Be happy. Be with Lance. You two are going to need each other, you know that don't you?"

"Well.....yeah, sure. I guess."

"You two have some great times ahead. And some crazy times, no doubt about it. And your kids are gonna be awesome."

"Our kids. Right. Uh.... Eric?"

"Yeah?"

"What the HELL are you talking about?!?"

"Kev.... I've got to go...."

".... continuing now with a Fox News Alert, and the breaking news out of Mississippi about the church fire that involves N'Sync. Fox News has learned that two children have been pulled from the building, and that they are alive, so some very good news there. However, we still have unconfirmed reports that two members of the band that played with N'Sync tonight may still be trapped inside that burning church. We're going to switch now to our local affiliate, who may have some more information for us..."

In an apartment in Oxford, Mississippi, Gina Dawson and Sarah Adams sat on the couch and held hands. They weren't there at the concert, although they knew all about it. Work and summer classes prevented them from attending. Still, having a neighbor dating someone in one of the most popular bands kept them in the loop, so to speak, when it came to most of the ins and outs of what was going on.

They, too, had been aimlessly going from channel to channel before going to bed. When they stopped on the Fox News Channel, they found themselves no longer tired.

"....have word from an eyewitness who says he saw N'Sync and two other men arrive at the scene shortly after the fire broke out, and then saw those other men run into the building. Apparently, they had been told that there were children inside and they took it upon themselves to try and save them. We want to bring into this a spokesperson for the Jackson Fire Department, who can perhaps tell us more about what is going on at the scene..."

Gina turned to Sarah, each having tears in their eyes.

"It's them, isn't it?" she asked.

Sarah, choking back tears, could only nod.

Racing through the streets of Jackson, Jim and Diane Bass sat in silence.

They didn't watch the news on television, nor did they listen to the radio. There was no need to. Their son called them only minutes before, and had barely been able to choke out the words.

"Mom....it's me..."

"James? Honey, what is it, what's wrong?" Diane had replied.

"M-mom....I need you and dad to....there was a fire....some people got hurt..."

"A fire! James, what happened, are you alright? What about the other boys? We said goodbye to you after the show, and things were fine...what fire?"

"Another....another church.....please...please momma, get daddy and come down to the hospital, okay? Please? Saint....Saint Dominic...."

"Honey, we'll be right there, you just stay right where you are..."

Now, two worried parents made there way in and out of traffic. Something awful had happened, something involving their son. Pop superstar or not, he was still their little boy, and he needed them. That was all that mattered now.

"I'm sure he's okay," Jim said softly.

Diane nodded.

"We're almost there."

"Go where? I'm still confused."

"I know. But it'll be okay. I promise."

Eric stood up and finished off the last of his coffee.

"You'll be fine. Just trust me. I gotta go Kev."

Eric turned and began to walk away.

"No, Eric....wait....go where? Where are you going? Eric? Eric?! ERIC?!!?"

"....Eric.......where.....Eric?....."

Taking a deep breath, Kevin Douglas opened his eyes slowly, painfully. The intense light coming from above him hurt, so he had to squint a little, making his already blurry vision that much more distorted.

A nurse who had been checking his pulse looked over and smiled when she saw that her patient was now awake.

"Well, hello there. You gave us quite a scare, young man."

"Mmmmm.....head hurts."

"And it probably will for a day or so. You've got a nasty concussion."

Kevin tried to sit up, but a sharp pain ran up his spine, causing him to wince and moan, and then layback.

"My back....what happened...?"

"I'll let the doctor explain it to you, alright? But you'll be glad to know that you should be just fine. In the meantime, there are a few people who would like to see you...one in particular. I'll go get him now."

"Eric?" Kevin asked, still a little confused.

The nurse, who had began to walk to the door, stopped. She was about to tell him something, but thought better of it. "Why....no.....no, I think his name is actually James. I'll get him...and the doctor will be in right away."

His head swimming with pain and confusion, Kevin closed his eyes and lay back gently on the pillow. It all was just a weird dream. That's all. From the concussion.

"Hey...hey you."

Opening his eyes again, Kevin saw Lance looking down at him, a smile on his face and tears in his eyes.

"Hey babe.....meet any cute doctors in this place?" Kevin said weakly.

In spite of the situation, Lance laughed a little, then pulled up a chair so that he could sit next to Kevin's bed. "Nah...they're all too old for my taste....and I already have a dad anyway."

Kevin laughed, and grimaced as he did so. "Ow...that hurts!"

"I know," Lance replied softly. "How do you feel?"

"My head is pounding, my back is killing me, and I think they put one of those tube things in my dick so I can pee. Other than that, I'm great. What about you?"

"I'm....I'm okay." Lance's lip began to tremble, then he broke down and began crying. "I..I was so worried about you," he sobbed.

"I know...I know. I'm sorry I scared you," Kevin said as he reached up, painfully, and ran his hand over Lance's cheek. "Hey...I'm okay though, really. I'm gonna make it."

Lance nodded and wiped his eyes with his arm.

"Lance?"

"Yeah?"

"Where's Eric?"

Lance stiffened.

"Eric."

"Yeah, where is he?"

"Kevin....Eric is..."

Just then, the door opened and a doctor walked in.

"Well, welcome back, Mr. Douglas. How are you feeling?" he said.

"I've been better," Kevin said as Lance turned away.

"I imagine you have. You're a very lucky young man, you know. Can you tell me where you are?"

"In a hospital."

"Which one?"

"Uh....well, one is about the same as the other, and since I'm not from here...."

"Fair enough," the doctor laughed. "Do you know what day it is?"

"Thursday."

"Close....past midnight, so it's Friday now, but I'll give you that one. How many fingers am I holding up?"

"Three," Kevin correctly answered.

"Very good. Well, you do have a concussion, but I don't think there will be any long term effects from it. I'll ask you those same questions again in a few hours. Now, then....your back."

"Yeah, what the hell happened?"

Lance turned again, and walked back over to Kevin's bed.

"You really are very lucky. You didn't break anything, but you did suffer some deep bruising, and a mild case of spinal shock. Other than pain and general weakness, that should heal up in a few weeks. But, you'll probably need crutches for a few days to help get you around, support your weight. I'll do some tests a little later this morning to see how much strength you currently have in your back, and that should tell us more about your anticipated recovery time."

"Yeah....great. Can you tell me something?"

"Certainly, what?"

"Where's Eric? My friend? We were both in there together."

The doctor looked at Lance, who closed his eyes and nodded his head.

"Your friend is in another area of the hospital."

"Like, outpatient or something?" Kevin asked.

"No....I'm afraid he's in the Burn Unit."

"Justin....Justin, calm down. Here, sit down by us."

Justin paced back and forth, ignoring the words of Chris Kirkpatrick.

"You hungry, kiddo? You want to go to the cafeteria?" Joey Fatone tried. Still no answer, as Justin walked around the room nervously.

"Justin, come on," JC Chasez said as he stood and walked over to his young friend. "Come and sit down, try to relax."

"No! That's easy for you to say! You weren't there! You don't know!"

"Yes, yes I was there, Justin...and I do know. Eric is hurt, very badly. But walking back and forth like this won't solve anything, now will it?"

Justin stopped in mid-stride. "No...I guess not."

"Come on, sit by us. Lance will be back in a few minutes to tell us how Kevin is, and then we'll go upstairs."

Resigned, Justin sighed and walked over to the chairs and sat next to Chris.

"It was so scary...they had him on this stretcher...and wrapped this...this foil stuff all over him...they started talking about 'tubing' him, whatever that means..." Justin said as he put his head in his hands.

"I know, buddy, I know. They're doing everything they can for him...and this is one of the best hospitals in town. You'll see, everything will be fine."

Chris looked back up, and saw JC heading for the door.

"Josh?"

"Be right back....bathroom..."

As he walked out into the hall, JC picked up his pace as he headed for the men's room. Nothing had prepared him for the events that had happened so far, or that continued to happen. They called him 'Fearless Leader,' but right now he was very afraid. Afraid for Lance and Justin, afraid for Kevin and Eric, whom he barely knew. Afraid at what this might do to the group. The stress, the sheer enormity of what had gone on in the last few hours were starting to take their toll on him.

Pushing open the door to the bathroom, he quickly ran to a stall, slammed the door behind him, knelt down, and vomited.

After a few minutes, and feeling a little better, he splashed cold water on his face, dried it off with paper towel, and took a deep breath. He walked back to where the others were.

They needed him.

He needed them.

"...about seventy percent of the body. Mostly third degree."

Kevin stared blankly at the doctor, who was explaining the nature and extent of the injuries Eric had suffered. Lance stood next to the bed, his head bowed in a combination of regret and resignation.

"But...I mean, he'll get better, won't he? People recover from this stuff all the time, right?" Kevin asked.

Dr. Haycraft shook his head solemnly. "With burns of this magnitude and extent, the chances for complete recovery are slim. I'm sorry."

"No...no, that can't be right. You guys...you guys are supposed to fix him!" Kevin exclaimed, his voice rising.

"Son, I'm sorry, but there really isn't..."

"Bullshit!" Kevin yelled. He attempted to sit up straight, but the pain in his back prevented him from doing so. "God...DAMMIT!" he winced, as Lance tried to ease him back onto the bed.

"Kev, calm down...take it easy..."

"I want to see him," Kevin said through clenched teeth.

"Out of the question. You're in no condition to get around by yourself at this point. As soon as we know something more, we'll come down and let you know. Besides, you aren't immediate family," the doctor explained.

"I'm his roommate!"

"Still, that doesn't make you..."

"I'm his best friend!"

"Son, rules are rules! Once his parents get here, then perhaps something can..."

Kevin turned to Lance. "Lance...Lance, please...help me. Do something!" he begged.

Lance sighed in resignation and nodded. "Doctor, can I speak to you outside, please?" he said, walking over and taking the physician by the arm, leading him out of the room.

"Look," Lance began as he closed the door behind him, "this night has been hell on all of us. Can't you make an exception, just this once?"

"Mr. Bass, hospital policy strictly forbids anyone from entering the Critical Care units unless they are a family member. I'm sorry, but there isn't anything I can do."

"But we're going up there in a few minutes! Me and the other guys...what difference does it make if Kevin comes up there or not?!"

"You and the other gentlemen will be in the waiting area, nothing more."

"Alright! Fine! So, why can't Kevin come up to the waiting area with us?!"

"He has a serious concussion, and a serve back injury! If he starts walking around now, he could jeopardize his recover.."

"Don't you people have fucking wheelchairs in here!" Lance screamed.

Dr. Haycraft took off his glasses and sighed. Rubbing his eyes with one hand, he shuffled from foot to foot for a moment. "Alright. Fine. A wheelchair. Let me call upstairs and make the arrangements. But, and I won't bend on this point, I want him to wait at least another forty-five minutes to an hour. He just woke up and still seems somewhat disoriented. One hour."

"One hour," Lance nodded.

"Jim, Diane, thank God you're here," Joey said as Lance's parents came into the room.

"Joe, what happened son? What's going on?" Jim Bass asked. "Church fire? What were you kids doing in the area to begin with?"

"Jim, come on, let me explain," Joey said as he pulled Jim aside.

"D-Diane?" Justin whimpered, his lower lip trembling.

"Oh, Justin, honey...it's alright, everything is going to be alright," she said, taking him into her arms. "I'm just thankful that you are the other boys weren't hurt...but James said something about friends of yours? How are they?"

Justin sniffed and wiped his eyes as he let go of Lance's mother. "Kevin...Kevin should be okay. But Eric....Eric was hurt really, really bad. They don't...they don't..."

Diane nodded knowingly. "Keep praying for him, honey. Just keep praying."

JC walked back into the waiting room, and greeted Lance's parents. "Thanks for coming over so quickly. We could use a little help until Johnny and the others get here."

"Understandable," Jim Bass sighed. "Where's my son?"

"Checking in on Kevin," Chris answered. "He should be back in a couple of minutes.

Diane smiled. "That's our James. Always concerned about other people."

Chris and Joey looked at each other, while JC turned away for a moment. Justin could only look down at the floor and sob quietly to himself.

Together, these four had worked so hard to protect Lance, keeping his secret safe from everyone around them, and that included their families. Only a handful of people outside of the group had knowledge of his sexuality, but they were at the highest levels of management who had nothing to gain by making that information public knowledge. Now, all of that could come crashing down around them. Silently, each one vowed to do whatever he could to keep the floodgates closed.

They couldn't know that, in spite of their best efforts, those gates would be opened. They couldn't imagine who it would be that would open them.

"Try to get some rest. I'll come back in a little bit, and we'll take you upstairs," Lance said softly.

"Where are you going?"

"Back to the others. My folks should be here by now."

Lance leaned over and kissed Kevin on the forehead, then turned to leave.

"Lance?"

Lance stopped and turned back around.

"Lance...I need to get up there. You understand that? I have to go see him."

"I know, Kevin. I understand."

"Promise me you'll get me up there?"

"I promise Kevin. I promise."

Exiting the room and walking down the hall back to the special waiting area, Lance sighed and said a silent prayer, imploring God that Eric could hold on just a little longer.

River Forest sits west of the city of Chicago, roughly thirty minutes or so via the Eisenhower Expressway. Forty-five minutes on a bad day. It's a suburb characterized by several things one would find in just about any smaller urban area: parks, small shops, friendly people, a multi-generational ethic identity. And money.

In the case of River Forest, old money.

The Douglas family had made their presence known here, in one way or another, for the better part of a century, but it wasn't until Richard Douglas, Sr., began to build what would eventually become a small business empire in the 1940s, that the family truly made their mark.

"Mr. Richard," as he was known to many in the community, had a large apartment in the city as well, but the sprawling mansion along Thatcher Drive would forever be home, and home base for the family. He was proud of it, and beamed when members of his family came, his children and grandchildren, nieces and nephews, cousins, both close and distant. He was the patriarch, and his wife, Helen, stood by his side - through good times and bad - for over forty years of marriage.

It was Helen Douglas who presided over the family now. "Mr. Richard" passed on in 1996, having lived 76 years on this earth, and having witnessed so many things happen to his country and family. Normally, the eldest son (and heir) would have stepped into the role of head of the family, but tragic fate took Richard, Jr., away from them in a plane crash in 1979. Many said that old "Mr. Richard" never recovered from his oldest boy's death. His younger son, Jacob, took on many of the responsibilities that his brother would have inherited, but Helen remained the grand dame of the family. It was a role that suited her, and she took to it with a sense of flair and grace one would expect of one in her station.

The grandchildren, the grand-nieces and nephews called her "Nanna," and while someone else in her position might have corrected them, she never did. Certainly, she expected a certain kind of behavior from them, but this one concession, one of familial affection, she secretly reveled in.

She had buried her oldest son and her husband in her lifetime. Now, in the twilight of her years, she was faced with the possibility of burying a grandson.

"Tell me again," she said to those around her, "what was he doing?"

"Playing in a concert Nanna," Chad Douglas said. "It was a charity event that he helped organize, and he and some friends played in a band."

"Why didn't he just give the poor souls a donation?" Helen asked in wonder.

"Mother, that's not the point," Jacob Douglas said, rubbing his eyes and getting up from his seat. "Kevin wanted to do something more than just give away money. He wanted to try and make a difference."

"Jacob, must we talk of him in the past tense?"

Jacob sighed and paced around the large library.

"And who were these other people?"

"N'Sync, Nanna."

"In what?"

"Never mind that now," Jacob interrupted, "we still don't know if Kevin was seriously hurt or not. All we know is that he was taken to a hospital in Jackson. As soon as we find out anything else, I'll fly down there."

"I'm going too," Chad said.

"I think it would be better if you stayed here with your mom and grandmother, Chad."

"But I want to go! He's my cousin!"

Helen shut her eyes. "Children, please. Jacob, it's only right that Chad accompany you. As should I."

"Mother, that shouldn't be necessary."

"Jacob, my grandson is in the hospital. If he is hurt, I should be there."

"But it's a long flight, and at..." Jacob was going to continue but thought better of it.

Helen, meanwhile, raised an eyebrow.

Thankfully, Jacob Douglas was saved when his wife, Robin, entered the room."

"It's Saint Dominic - Jackson Memorial, and he's in serious but stable condition," she said, breathless.

"Oh, thank God," Jacob said as he embraced his wife. "I'll have the plane waiting for me..."

"And me!" Chad said.

"...and Chad, shortly. All right, you come with me. But mother, I still say you should stay here with Robin."

Helen closed her eyes and sighed, her fingers tapping the arms of the chair she sat in. "Very well. But if his condition worsens, you will notify me immediately. I'll have Alexander make sure the other plane stands by."

"There is...one other thing, Mother," Jacob began hesitantly. But Helen was one step ahead of her younger son.

"No. Not unless his condition becomes more serious."

"But Mother, he has a right to know. After all these years, and especially now..."

"I said no, Jacob. Now is not the time."

Jacob nodded, kissed his wife on the cheek, and left the room, his son right behind.

A private college, somewhere in America.

Most students were in bed at this late hour, but a few remained awake, watching the talking heads and listening to the sound bites coming through their television sets. The news broke earlier that night, and only the most curious, or the most die-hard of fans, chose to stay awake and watch for the latest developments.

One student, a young man in his early twenties, leaned back on the old, worn out couch of the dorm lobby. Most of the others had long since gone up to bed, and only the curious or the night owl were left.

"Man, this is all over the place tonight," a girl to his right said to no one in particular.

The young man nodded in reply. Then, he got up and walked over to a row of vending machines.

"You want something Angie?" he asked.

"Yeah, a Coke. Thanks, Rich."

Digging in his pockets, the young man pulled out the change needed for two soft drinks. As he dropped in the first quarter, he grit his teeth and willed himself not to cry.

He couldn't die. He just couldn't.

It would be so unfair to the both of them.

"Here. You look like you could use this."

Lance looked up and saw Chris holding out a cup of coffee.

"Thanks," he said quietly.

"Honey, why don't you close your eyes for awhile. You look exhausted," Diane said, lightly stroking the back of her son's head as she did so.

"No, momma, I'm fine." Lance took a sip of the black liquid, wincing a little at the bitter taste.

"It couldn't hurt, son," Jim added. "We'll wake you up if something happens. And I'm sure that other guy is sound asleep anyway."

"His name is Kevin, dad."

Jim Bass was about to say something else, but a look from his wife made him think better of it.

JC walked over to the Bass family. "Lance, they're right. Catch a few winks, and we'll wake you up when they say we can go upstairs."

"One hour. The doc said Kevin could go up in one hour."

JC nodded. "I know...that gives you about twenty minutes or so. Take a power nap, okay bud?"

"Well, I guess it couldn't hurt," Lance said, putting the Styrofoam cup down on the table in front of them. "But promise to wake me up."

"We will," Diane promised.

"But you have to believe me! I really do work for Lance Bass!"

Terry tried to reason with the police, for about the tenth time.

"Son, you might work for the government for all I care, but my orders are to keep everyone but family out of the area! Now, I'm not going to tell you again!"

Terry walked off, away from the hospital entrance. He moved towards a bench where he could sit and wait. That was all he could do.

But, often a knight had to wait when in the service of a prince. And that is what Terry resolved to do.

Lance woke up with a start.

The room was empty, the lights dimmer than they had been when he fell asleep.

"Where did everybody go?" he said to himself. "Why'd they leave me here?"

"They didn't," Eric said as he walked into the room.

"Eric? Is that you?"

"Last time I checked, Lancelot."

"B-but...what are you doing here? Shouldn't you be...I mean, you're upstairs."

Eric shrugged and gave a lopsided smile.

"I'm dreaming, aren't I?" Lance asked.

"Just making the rounds. You know. Making sure you're all right."

"I think I am," Lance said, a little confused. "Tired, but okay other than that."

"Good. I just wanted to make sure."

"This has gotta be a dream."

"Maybe," Eric grinned. "Dreams are funny things. Kind of like a roller coaster, you know? There's always that unexpected twist and curve. Or a peak or valley. Then again, life is a lot like that, too."

Lance nodded.

"Well, I gotta go Lance. Take care of things for me, okay? And take care of Kev."

"Right...sure. See you around."

Eric looked back and winked before he walked out of the room.

"Huh. That was weird. I wonder where he has to go...go...oh, no. Oh, no, no, no....wake up, Bass! Wake up! WAKE UP!!!!"

Lance sat up with a start.

"Lance? Honey, what's the matter?" Diane asked.

Lance stood up quickly and looked around the room, at his parents and his bandmates.

"We have to go upstairs. NOW."

Pacing nervously back and forth, he waited. The nurse helped Kevin out of bed and over to the bathroom.

"Mother of God," Kevin moaned as he walked back into the larger room slowly, taking each step carefully. "It feels like somebody took a sledgehammer to my dick and balls!"

Lance blushed and looked at the nurse, who smiled knowingly.

"Trust me," she said, "I've heard worse."

Carefully and gently, she assisted Kevin as he sunk down into the wheelchair. He closed his eyes in pain as he sat back in it slowly.

"Ready?" the nurse asked.

"I can take him, ma'am," Lance said.

"Sir, we've told you before. Hospital policy states very clearly that..."

"Okay, okay," Lance said in surrender. "Can I have a minute alone with him though first? We'll meet you at the elevator."

The nurse nodded and walked out of the room and down the hall.

"How do you feel?"

"Like hell," Kevin said, his eyes still closed. "But I have to do this, Lance. I have to." He opened his eyes and looked at Lance. "Do you understand?"

Lance nodded and walked behind Kevin, pushing the chair out the door and in the direction of the elevators, where the nurse was waiting.

Just a little bit longer, God, Lance thought to himself. Just a little longer. Five more minutes, that's all.

The ride up seemed to last an eternity, even though it was only a matter of seconds before they reached their destination.

More cold, white, sterile walls. More doctors and nurses going about their business.

Turning a corner, the trio approached the large double doors that led into the waiting area for the Burn Unit. As they began to walk down the hall, they could see through the windows that those already inside were standing, huddled around a doctor.

Opening one of the doors, the nurse stepped aside as Lance wheeled Kevin into the room.

"...the time of death was exactly 3:27. I'm very sorry," the doctor said grimly. "There was nothing we could do for him."

"Damn you, God," Lance said under his breath, closing his eyes in defeat.

"Wait...wait, what did you say?" Kevin asked.

Justin turned to Kevin, his lower lip trembling.

"K-Kev...I'm so sorry," he choked out.

Joey turned away, crossing himself as he did so.

Chris looked down at the floor.

JC closed his eyes and folded his hands.

Jim and Diane Bass began to approach their son and their son's friend.

"Son," Jim began, "I'm sorry."

"No...no, wait...no, this can't be happening," Kevin exclaimed.

"Kevin, take it easy," Lance said. "Calm down..."

Kevin, in spite of the extreme pain in his back, sat up totally straight, and looked at those in front of him. Justin, Joey, Chris, JC, Jim Bass, Diane Bass. Then, he turned to his left, where Lance came up to stand beside him, tears in his eyes.

"I tried, Kevin. I tried."

With supreme effort that astounded all around him, Kevin pushed himself up and out of the chair. He took a few uneasy steps forward, and then over to the side of the room where he leaned up against the wall. Slowly, he slid down to the floor.

Bringing his knees up to his chest, and ignoring the pain shooting across his back, started to rock back and forth.

And he began to scream.

Lance leaned down to embrace him, but Kevin would not let him.

And he continued to scream.

Justin and JC rushed over to try and help, but Kevin pushed them away.

And he continued to scream.

The stillness of the night settled over the country. Firefighters finished their work at the scene of a church fire in Jackson, Mississippi. A man and his son sat in their seats in a private plane. Terry Reid tried in vain once again to explain who he was to uniformed police outside a hospital. Helen Douglas tried to sleep, but could not. Gina Dawson and Sarah Adams drove on through the night. Britney Spears was on a plane of her own.

Darkness enveloped them all.

And Kevin continued to scream.

And scream.

And scream.

And scream.

He had been abandoned again.

End of Chapter 20