Michael's Secret Love Chapter 11 December 9, 2000 Written By: Justin Case
Disclaimer: This story is entirely fiction created solely for educational and entertainment purposes. This story is written with graphic sexual content and should be viewed by persons legally able to do so. The characters, places, and events are purely of the author's imagination, any resemblance to real people is coincidental. The author, his editor and this web site do not accept any responsibility for your actions.
Words from the author: HELLO, AND SEASONS GREETINGS TO YOU ALL. One of my favorite songs just came on the stereo as I began, Michael Anthony's "When You Sing to Me". My favorite line is "I'm not afraid of love."
I'm sorry to digress, I want to send you all my heartfelt tidings for a safe and joyous holiday. I also want to say thank you all, for being so patient and waiting for me to pick the story back up. It's about time!
Now, my soapbox; Hehe! I hope, you all spread love through out your communities during this time of religious reflection, as well as all year long. Let us go forth with love, and set the example. Let us live with peace in our hearts, and humility in our minds. Most of all, let us be the leaders! Please pray for the ones who know no love. Pray for our fallen brethren, the ones who have died from AIDS, suicide and murder. Pray for everyone, we surely need it.
God Bless us all!
Justin Case
I sat there trembling in James' arms in that small chapel for what seemed like eternity. I thought of all the injustice of the world in which we live. I thought of all the unfairness and prejudice that we live with on a daily basis. I wondered, why in times of great sorrow we turned to a person larger than ourselves. Was our deity only there for us when we needed him? Did he judge us because we only seem to turn to him when we are down?
I began to realize that my God, was a God of love, unconditional love. He certainly understood our weaknesses and flaws, therefore he knew the score. I prayed for Eugene, and I prayed for James and I. I prayed for Eugene's recovery. I sat there in silence with my lover by my side. I felt his body as he breathed, I could smell his scent. I became enveloped in a great feeling of comfort. I must have dozed off, because I woke with a start as the doors to the chapel opened.
"Michael, Michael." Came Mrs. Bellevue's voice.
I focused my eyes on her. She looked out of sorts, her eye make up was smudged from her sobbing, her hair was all tangled from her twisting her fingers through it. I noticed the dress she was wearing was faded from years of use. She seemed to look much older than she was, as if in the last few hours she had aged ten fold.
"Yes, Ma'am." I broke the silence with my rasping voice.
"Dear, could you and James come with me to see Eugene? He's awake and asking for both of you." She smiled at us, as she came and put her arms around both of us.
"Certainly." James said, taking charge.
"Eugene and I are so lucky to have you both in our lives. Don't worry I think I know your secret, and I assure you both I will keep it between us. I hope I'm not being to presumptuous, but I assumed you two are an in love with each other. I was hoping we could all get through this together. I have so much to learn." Came her tender voice, the way only a mother could be.
"Mrs. Bellevue, we will help Eugene and you in any way we can. Yes, Michael and I are lovers. We appreciate your keeping our secret, and of course we'll help you have my word." Came James' voice.
I couldn't believe what I was hearing. Was I still sleeping or was this real? Did James just tell Eugene's mother that we were gay? I was astounded. My thoughts must have been all over my face.
"Don't worry Michael, I'm just thankful that I know the truth. I won't tell a soul, but will look to you both for advice. I mean, after-all I don't know anyone else to turn to." Mrs. Bellevue whispered to me.
"I don't really know how much we can offer. I mean, we're just two people in love that have to hide our feelings from others. Our love is no different; but not accepted by this society." I said with some conviction.
"I see, and think I understand." Mrs. Bellevue said, as she guided us out the doors to the hallway.
I became entranced in the green and white tiles again, as we made our way down the corridor to the nurses' station. I began to feel weak. I could hear echoes in my ears, my eyes blackened the sights before me, my body collapsed. The next thing I remember was being called to from far beyond, the voices seemed to be miles away. My mind came rushing back, I opened my eyes, my head hurt immensely. Why was I lying on the floor? Who were all these people standing over me?
"Michael, Michael. Are you alright? You fainted, don't move." Came a strange but friendly voice.
I focused my eyes on the woman talking to me, then her clothing, she was a nurse. The nurse and an assistant, helped me to a chair. James hovered over me like a hawk watching it's prey, he didn't take his eyes off me.
"Are you ok?" James asked, with his sweet voice.
"I think so, I just feel so weak." I replied softly.
"He'll be fine Son, it's just the excitement. Don't worry, just sit for a few minutes." The nurse said to us, her voice filled with warmth. She turned and walked away, leaving me with my best friend at my side.
Mrs. Bellevue strolled up to us, still looking disheveled, but more relieved. I thought about that faded dress again, I realized the sacrifices she had made for her son. Eugene had nice new clothes, but his mother wore her garments far beyond their time. I thought about my own mother and how she always took the chipped dinner plate, or smallest portion. It's the little things that I often overlook, that explain the big things in my life.
"Are you going to be alright? I am so sorry, I hope it wasn't anything I said that upset you." Eugene's mother said to me.
"No, I think it's just all the stress. I've been going through so much lately, the chorus, Eugene, James and I...." I babbled, I couldn't finish my thoughts out-loud.
"Everything will be alright. If you ever need someone to talk to please, please know you can confide in me. That goes for both of you, I mean it." Mrs. Bellevue stated with understanding in her voice.
"Thank you, I'm sure I'll be fine." I said as I began to get out of the chair, James helped me to my feet.
"Let's go see Eugene, he needs us." James said, taking charge of the moment again.
"Yes, he does. Yes, he does." I stated, as the three of us walked to his room.
I saw our friend lying in that hospital bed, looking so helpless. I could feel some tears welling in my eyes. James took my right hand in his left and escorted me to the bedside. I looked into Eugene's eyes, I released my grasp from James and placed the palm of my hand on Eugene's cheek.
"Oh, Eugene. I'm so happy you're alright, I don't know what I would have done if something had happened to you." I said, between my sobs.
"Eugene, you need to know we both love you man. You're like a brother to us." Came James' voice from behind me. He moved so he could be on the other side of the bed, our friend in the middle of us. He reached to Eugene's right hand and took it into his own.
"I'm so ashamed of myself. Why am I like this?" Eugene's whispers came.
"Because, we are the chosen ones. All of us." James said, as he squeezed Eugene's hand.
"That's right buddy, we are all the same." I said, as I lowered my lips to Eugene's cheek and placed a kiss on it.
"You mean..." Came Eugene's whisper.
"Yes, we're gay too. Actually we're lovers." James said, always to the point.
Mrs. Bellevue stood at the foot of the bed watching the three of us boys showing love for one another, unconditional love for each other. I looked down towards her and saw tears running down her cheeks.
"Eugene, I love you no matter what. You are my son, you will always be my son. You need to know I am here for you." His mother said to him between her own sobs.
"James, what do you mean, we are the chosen ones?" I heard Eugene's raspy voice ask.
"God chose us to be the ones. I don't know why, I just know he chose us and others like us to be the way we are. He chose everyone to be the way they are." James stated, with confidence, after-all he was a minister's son, he should know.
"That was beautiful James, and so true. It's just such a shame others don't realize it, and that's why we have to keep this between ourselves. We just don't know who we can trust with the truth." Mrs. Bellevue said, as she smiled toward her son.
"I can't believe all of this. Thank you all so much for being here. I love you all." Eugene said as his eyes closed and he fell back asleep.
"We better let him get some rest. Let's go down to the chapel." Father Jones said, he had come into the room so quietly none of us knew he was there.
The four of us walked back to the chapel. Father Jones led the way. I began to feel a comfort come over me, a comfort in the fact that I had released my "demons" to others. I didn't feel shame with the three people with whom I was with, nor with Eugene. I reveled in the thought, that I could be myself with these people, truly be myself. I mean I had been able to be myself with James, but only with James. Now, I had others in a circle of friends that I hoped would grow larger.