My Journal

By Michael Santos

Published on Dec 29, 2004

Gay

Before I share my journal entries with you all, I'd like to take the time to share some information about myself. My name is Michael. I am half Portuguese and half Caucasian, with a tan complexion. I have black hair and hazel eyes. I am 5'7, 160 lbs with an athletic build. I currently attend university. I have come out of the closet so to speak for over 10 years. I am a bottom, and sometimes the occasional top in some instances. The last time I measured, it was over 7.5" long, cut. I have heard about this website and I am an avid reader. I have kept a journal for over 11 years now. Through the pages of my journal are many frequent gay encounters I have had over the past 10 years. I have decided to share these encounters with you all and I hope that enjoy reading them.

Well you may all be wondering about my first gay experience. First I should tell you about my journal. I had to keep a journal of my thoughts and experiences for my shrink. See around the age of 9, my parents divorced. I decided to stay with my mother of Portuguese decent. It affected me a great deal. I wouldn't talk much and my mom thought it best that I'd see a shrink because of this. It was then that my shrink asked that I keep a journal of my week's events. It was apparently a way of sharing my feelings and expressions on my everyday life. The first two years were quite boring. Just the usual everyday stuff of going to school, eating, playing, etc. At school I was quiet, yet quite educated. My mom was quite impressed that I still maintained a great grade through the apparent trouble and distress that my shrink thought I was in. It was when I went into grade 6 that I met my first true best friend. I had friends at school, but I had a truly fonder friendship with my friend David. He was a blonde haired boy with blue eyes and a skinny build. He was a new arrival to the school. I decided to befriend him. We talked about what normal boys would talk about. We played the usual schoolyard games and shared our interests and hobbys. We soon began hanging out at each other's places, playing video games, sports, or other hobbies. I found out too that David was in the same situation as I was in. He too came from a broken family, living with his mother as well. However, the situation didn't seem to bother him at all and like myself, coped with it in his own way.

I would say it was coming around the end of the school year. Both myself and David just turned 12 and we were best of friends. I was hanging out at David's after school. His mom wasn't home. David suggested the idea of playing wrestling like that on TV. I went along with the idea. David suggested we take off our shirts for realism. I went along with the idea. We wrestled around for a good 30 minutes, having good fun. After a water break, David stated that he wanted to take his jeans off and wrestle in his underwear. He suggested the idea at first and I wasn't too taken to it. I had asked what if his mom came in, however he said not to worry as she was working very late at the hospital. It was hot and I was sweating quite a bit, and after some pressure from David, I went along with it. He stripped down to his tight white briefs, while I to my tanned colour briefs. We continued to wrestle, rolling around. We pinned each other down. There were many times that my crotch rubbed against David's, and after a few times I can began to feel his cock poke out from his briefs. It became apparent that David somehow got turned on by this, but he wasn't alone in that department. I too, also achieved an erection when David's hands and crotch brushed against the outside of my briefs. I kind of felt embarassed and after a while, I decided to stop in an excuse to catch my breath.

I went to the bathroom hoping to calm down but I seemed too excited from it to calm down my erection. I had never achieved one before but here I was with one. I decided to come back to living room where we were playing, but as I approached the entranceway, I saw David sitting on the couch with his cock out. He was rubbing it and caressing it. I wondered what he was doing but it became apparent that he was masturbating it. I could see his cock, being quite large and cut, with a growing little tuft of blonde pubic hair behind it. I walked back. I couldn't believe he was doing this. Was he turned on by me? I had no clue. Yet however, it seemed by seeing this, my erection became bigger. I went and flushed the toilet as a sign to him that I was on the way. When I got back to the living room, David had put away his tool but I could still see his erection from his shorts. I told him that I was getting tired of wrestling. He then asked if I wanted to go to his room. I was creeped out by this gesture a little, but I decided to join him. We took our clothes and headed up to his room.

When we got there, we sat down and talked. David then got out a box underneath some clothes in his closet. He opened the box, and in there were several porno magazines. He said that it was something he stole from his dad when he used to live there. We flipped through them, looking and laughing at the pictures. I looked down at our shorts, noticing both erections still stagnant. We then got to a male porno magazine. I assumed this was maybe his mom's stash, but I could have been wrong. We flipped through pictures. I could see David's eyes glued to the pages. I looked through the different pictures, noticing males sucking other males bodies, cocks, and bums. I even saw the anal intercourse pictures. I laughed a little but David seemed to be not responding to my giggles. David then turned to me and asked me if I wanted to try something. At first I was clueless, but then when he told me what we were looking at in the magazine, I was in shock. I asked if he was joking, but he was serious. At first I didn't know how to take it. I asked him what if we got caught, but he went back to his mom not being home for a good while. I then said it looked kind of gross but he went on the fact that maybe it'll be cool. He said then to think of it as pretending. I was very naive at the time, and didn't know what to think or say. I asked that if we did this, to not tell anybody. David promised me that he wouldn't, asking that if we did do this, not to tell anybody on my end. I agreed, and still to this day remember shaking after I said this. David got up and locked his bedroom door before he joined me on the bed.

David laid me down, being ontop of me. He bent down and kissed me. I was kind of taken by his kiss, so I kissed him back, giggling and smiling. He then tried sticking his tongue in my mouth. I opened my eyes, trying to see what he was doing. I saw him with his eyes closed. I felt his tongue trying to attack mine. I attacked back, closing my eyes. He lowered himself ontop of me, rubbing his crotch against mine. He then began to kiss my chest, around my nipples. He started rubbing his hand on my crotch. I kept my eyes closed, trembling slightly. I began to feel my shorts being taken off. I peeked open my eyes as I saw him take my briefs off, exposing my erection with the little light patch of growing black pubic hairs in behind. I kept peeking through as David lowered his face around my cock and began to kiss it. He then gripped it and then lowered his mouth over it. I could feel his tongue licking around my cock. The feeling was weird yet I liked it. I began to breathe deeply and pant. I now felt bobbing up and down. The feeling got better and a sensation ran through my body. My breathing became deeper. David kept bobbing up and down, just like the pictures we saw in the magazine. I felt like I was going to pee and told David. He stopped and stood up. He dropped his briefs, exposing his hard cock. I took it as it was my turn. He came down to my level and we began to kiss each other. We began to French kiss. This was the first person I had ever made out with and the fact that they were male didn't seem to disturb me. I turned David on his back and continued to make out with him. Like David, I followed down to his chest and kissed his nipples. Before long I was down to his cock. Being nervous, I was still trembling, but I overcame it after my first touch on his cock. I caressed it ever so lightly, before laying a kiss on it. I kissed it again. Looking down on the floor where the magazine was opened to a guy giving another one a blowjob, I took a deep breath and closed my eyes. I wrapped my lips and mouth around David's cock. I could hear David gasp quietly before I began to bob up and down on his cock. I though I was doing good because of his breathing and the occasional quiet moan from him. I kept going and going and after a bit, David stopped me. He once again lay me on my back and we started to kiss and make out again. This time I noticed that he was rubbing his cock against mine. I reciprocated and tried to rub back. I could feel his little pubic hairs tickling my cock and it got me excited again. I wrapped my arms around him, eventually my hands finding his ass so I could control his rubbing action against me. We both started to breathe deeply, and David began to pant. I soon became excited again, and felt the tingling sensation in my cock that made me want to go and pee. I once again told David that I was going to pee, but it seemed that he didn't care. He kept rubbing. Finally my cock couldn't hold it any longer, and out shot a white gooey liquid from my cock that hit both mine and David's stomach. David moaned loudly as his cock as well shot out white liquid that covered our stomachs, some which touched my chest. It was my first orgasm and first ejaculation. David would explain to me that what happened was normal, and that it was nothing to worry about. We both went to the bathroom and showered off the semen that stuck to us. David asked that I wouldn't tell what happened to anybody. I promised him I wouldn't and he too promised as well. I began to realize how much I enjoyed the experience with him. He asked if we'd still be friends. I assured him that we would and if anything, that the experience strengthened our bond. I then asked if we'd could do this again. He agreed that we would.

When I got home, I realized that my life was turned around. I never realized that I was gay. I knew that I was always shy and insecure around girls, however with David and other males, I was very open and relaxed. I knew that this lifestyle would have to be secretive from my other friends and my relatives for reputation sake. I would continue to see David through the summer. I recorded every sexual encounter that we had. David also became a little daring. I remember one time when his mom was home, and she was in the bathroom beside his room, David gave me a blowjob. I remember letting out a moan and his mom asking what was wrong from the other room. I gave her an excuse that I bit my tongue by accident, which I still laugh about to this day. Another time when we were in grade 7, David invited me for a sleepover, and we were camping out in the living room. When the lights went out, David had crawled in my sleeping, with no clothes on and we started to hump on each other. David had to hold his hand over my mouth when I orgasmed because he knew I would moan loudly. In grade 8, we started to take our encounters a little further. We would take adventures into the park and go deep into the woods. There we would have our little encounters, making it my first public exposition. David also took the blowjobs one step further. I remember it was winter, and David came over to my place. I made sure he came when my mom wasn't home, and we went to my room. We never participated in sexual activity at my house, because usually when David came over, my mom was home. Thus, it was the perfect time for him to come over and christen my place so to speak. We went to my room and immediately got naked. We made out like crazy, before David went down on my cock. This time, he took some time out to play with my balls with his mouth. I remember him sucking on them, while stroking my cock. The sensation felt weird but yet good. He then continued to go down on my cock. This time he didn't stop, and soon I felt myself about to cum. I couldn't hold it any longer after David ran his long all over the head of my cock. I moaned loudly and my jizz went into his mouth. David closed his entire mouth after seeing me starting to cum and my shots went into his mouth. After he was done, David opened his mouth to show it empty. At first this kind of grossed me out, but David told me that he made sure to swallow quickly to leave no aftertaste in his mouth. I decided to give it a shot with David. I started to go down on his erect cock. I went deeper and deeper down, trying to get him to cum quickly. David's moans filled the air, and it wasn't long before I felt his cock beginning to jerk. I down one last time, holding my mouth down as I heard David moan loudly and felt his jizz hit the back of my throat. It was the first time I swallowed. We had many more experiences through grade 8. When we graduated, we celebrated by going up to his Dad's cottage and spending a couple weeks there. We would have a few moonlight swims together and quite a few secret sexual encounters up there as well. The fondest I remember was when we got it on in the lake at night. I remember David diving down in the water to try and suck my cock, only to choke on water. Our relationship would continue into high school, where at which point I will continue to read my entries!!! Thanks and I hope you enjoy my journal!!!

Next: Chapter 2: My Cuban Experience 1


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