Disclaimer: Reading stuff that's illegal for you to read is illegal, but rarely traceable or punishable; so who gives a damn? Do it. Don't get caught. It took me slightly longer for this one to finish. It's a little shorter than part one, and I know that there are a lot of holes in it. At least I think that. Feel free to hit me up (like you have been; YAY!) at getitright10@yahoo.com. Enjoy! iDisfrutala! -K
Stupid Jerk: Confusion (Part 2)
"It's almost six, he'll be here soon," Deirdre warned and asked, "Do you know what you're gonna say to him?"
I looked up at her. My head was in her lap. "I have no idea. Shit, Ion't even know what we are if we are anything, no?" I answered.
She smiled, "Buck up. I'm sure everything will be fine."
I exhaled loudly, "What about Darryl?"
She shrugged, "What about'im?"
"Have you considered how he'll take this? Yo soy enojado is what," I explained. "Why shouldn't he be mad though? I mean not too long ago he came onto me and I avoided him like the plague--"
She interrupted me, "It wasn't even a whole week."
"Yeah, pero I did it anyway. And all he did was tell me he liked me and kiss me real fast like," I defended. "Now Tom attacks my face, and," I paused, remembering, "I responded and made out with him. Agarre, yo. Pero I couldn't even speak to Darryl." I sat up.
"What happened between you and Darryl was under completely different circumstances. You and Darryl are best friends. Out of the blue, he comes onto you and come out to you all at once. I don't think your reaction was that horrible, and then you fixed it," she paused, "We used to go out, too, Paco. We're still friends," she took my hand.
"Yeah, but we were friends before that. And we'll always have what we did only cos we were each other's firsts," I surmised. Yeah, you heard right. I followed in Dad's footsteps. I had sex for the first time at 14. With Deirdre. Even though, that was only two almost three years ago, it seemed like ages had gone by since. We both came to a mutual agreement that we functioned better as friends, but hey, Deirdre would always be the one who I gave up my virginity to.
As usual she read my thoughts, "Your guy-girl virginity." I raised a brow. She laughed, taking her hand from mine, and elbowed me in my side, "Well if you and Tom do the nasty, you'll lose your guy-guy virginity."
I thought about that for a moment, "Eww. Damn, I ain't even close to being there yet." We both laughed.
"Don't worry about Darryl right now. Focus on you and Tom," she looked at her watch, "Well I don't know why George would drop you off and not hang around till I got here, but she's on her way to pick me up at my house. So, I'll see you tomorrow. Be on time!" She laughed and got up from the couch. Just as she left, Dad came in. "Hola, nenes."
"We ain't kids, cocho," I responded.
"Yeah you are," he laughed, "How are you Deirdre?"
"I'm good. On my way out though; so, see ya!" she waved good bye and headed out.
"So, que es el problema?" Dad asked me.
"No problems," I answered. It was a truthful answer. I didn't think the possible me and Tom was a problem per say.
"Really, mijo, que pasa? I can see it in your face. Algo esta eating at you," he sat down next to me.
"I can handle it," I answered.
He gave me a sidelong glance for a moment and finally nodded, "Okay."
I got up to go upstairs to my room. I wanted to think. To paint or draw something. "Cuando Darryl llega, dimelo por favor," I asked him to tell me when Darryl got here. For some reason I felt the need to be prepared.
"Si," he answered.
Once I got in my room and picked up my pad and pencil, I heard someone bounding up the stairs and down the hallway to my room. There was knock at the door. I took a deep breath. I knew it was Tom. Dad and Tio Adimar never knock, and it seems Faber has inherited this trait too. "Entra." The door opened, and don't ask me how because I can't tell you.
In a flurry of motion, I went from my desk to my bed and was attacked with kisses. Hands were everywhere, and moans sounded. And as usual, I ruined my pants for the second time that day. If you haven't guessed yet, I'm a leaker. I was on a natural high when he began nibbling on my neck, and then it occurred to me. `I was gonna have a hickey from a guy.' That's what threw me out of the moment; and damn him! Whatever Tom's hand was doing to the outside of my pants had me wanting to stay in that moment. iMaldigalo!
"Tom?" I said, catching my breath.
Just as breathily, he murmured what and went back to hickeying me. I pushed at him, pushing myself away, though he was still mostly on top of me. "Too fast?" he asked, laying his hand on my chest. I nodded. "Lo siento," he apologized.
I leaned to him and kissed him. That did it for me. I wanted this. "I'm not unsure anymore. Estoy totalmente seguro. I want this, but Ion't want this to just be makin' out all the time," I laughed and added, "Even though I enjoy it."
"But?" he asked.
"Pero are we gonna be in a real relationship? Friends with benefits? Try shit out and see where it goes? Cos I'm not completely ready for all the emotional shit," I answered. He was about to respond, but I continued, "Y tengo mas preguntas. Are you gay? Bi? Whatever? Does it not matter to you? Do you want this? Quieres ser mi novio?"
"It don't matter to me," he answered one of my questions and continued, "I liked you when I first saw you, but I knew you were straight just by interactions with all of you guys. I'm still not sure that I can believe what's happenin' with us cos I ain't never seen you give any guy a second look." He paused for a moment, "You drew that picture of me, and it just like -- you're the shit when it comes to art. I mean, I found that out first day when I first showed up at Ms. Place's class. But that picture. . . I asked you for sensual and you like drew more than that. Era la mas sexy. After seeing it I just-just damn.
"It was an impulse. I never thought for a second that you'd be into me," he finished and came back fully on top of me, pushing himself against me. Damn, my jeans were past uncomfortable. He leaned down and brought his face close to mine, locking eyes with me, "But you're into me, right?" All I could do was nod. "Buenisimo," he surmised, saying my "yes" was the best. With that he kissed me really hard again. His tongue dove into my mouth. He took control of the kiss, and just as it reached its apex, he jumped off of me. He went over to the door to my room and picked up his book bag. I never saw him put it there. "I'll see you tomorrow then, no?" he smiled his trademark smile.
"You gotta go so early?" I asked. Who leaves at a moment like that?! Who leaves you hangin' like that?!
"Paco, mira el reloj," he chuckled. I looked at the clock like he asked. Shit. It was nine o'clock. When the fuck had three hours gone by? "Time flies when you're havin' fun," he winked and was gone.
Alejandro hated it when his son, Paco, wouldn't open up to him. If and when this did happen, however, Alejandro knew that it was something big because he and Paco shared just about everything. Raising a child from the age of fifteen mostly by himself, Alejandro knew that he and Paco had a relationship that -- not purposely but because of circumstance -- was brutally honest. He hated when Paco kept things from him, and he hated keeping things from Paco; such as the phone call he had just received.
The phone rang. Alejandro picked it up, "Hello?"
"It's time for me to make an appearance, Andro," she said to Alejandro not even returning his hello.
Alejandro's breath froze in his throat upon realizing whom he was talking to. She sounded much the same maybe just slightly stronger. "Merisol," was all he responded in a whisper. "It's time for me to see him," Merisol continued.
"You call here after how long to make demands. I don't get you. For sixteen years you've left us alone, only sending one letter per year," he said angrily.
"I send his child support, too, every month," she justified.
"It took ten years for you to do that," Alejandro countered. He felt sick having this conversation.
"Well, I'm sorry about that, but I want to see him," she reasoned.
"I don't know if he wants that, Meri," he told her and laughed at himself on the inside. He still called her "Meri".
"He may not want it, but I know it's time," Merisol continued to press on.
"How do you know?" Alejandro asked, suddenly defensive. Protective.
"Much the same way I knew when to leave," Merisol responded simply and shooed away the little girl who pulled on her shirt.
Alejandro exhaled as a barrage of different emotions set upon him. "You never told me why. You've never told him why," he was almost in tears. Tears that he felt ashamed of.
"I know that, but I thought it would be for the best. I never thought my reasons would be accepted as good ones in the first place," she lay the phone on her shoulder and whispered loudly, "I'm on the phone. I'll take care of it later, okay?" She came back to the phone, "I'm sorry, Andro--"
"Alejandro or Alex. I don't go by that name anymore," he said through clenched teeth.
"I'm sorry, Alejandro. I'll not call you that anymore, but know you'll always be my Andro," she apologized.
"It's okay," he assured her.
"Well, back to the reason why I called in the first place. It's time for me to make my appearance even if he doesn't want it," she said matter-of-factly.
"Don't you ever say those words again," Alejandro spat into the phone.
"What words?" Merisol asked, genuinely confused.
"`Even if he doesn't want it'. iNo tienes el derecho de decidir nada para el!" Alejandro fumed.
"I'm his mother, Alejandro. I--"
"You gave up the right to choose what's best for him once you left! Don't act as if you are suddenly entitled," he interrupted her, almost ready to slam the phone on the receiver.
As she could when they were kids, she sensed what he wanted to do. "Don't hang up the phone, Andro -- I'm-I'm sorry. Alejandro."
After noticing that he stood, Alejandro sat heavily, "You ask him."
"Huh?"
"You write another one of your letters and ask him yourself if it's okay for him to see you. I--"
"Pero mi mensaje se recibiria seguramente mejor desde tu," she pleaded.
"Of course he'd take this request of yours better from me! But I won't do it," he interrupted her, and before she could object further, he told her, "Send him a letter and ask him personally. It's not my place. Adios, Merisol." With that he hung up the phone.
Alejandro knocked on his brother's door. He was happy Adimar had decided to live with him and Paco, especially with all the extra traveling his boss now had him and Luke doing. And it was good to have someone to come to for advice; though, Adimar had always been readily available. He heard lots of rustling and movement before the door opened. Adimar stuck his head out, laughing as Faber came behind him and kissed the back of his neck.
"No quiero molestarte, Adimar," (I didn't want to bother you) he began, "Pero, ella llamo." (But she called.)
Adimar saw the seriousness and sadness written across his younger brother's face. He told Faber to stop, opened his door fully and let his brother in the room. "Faber, te per favore." He sent Faber to get some tea. Faber threw on some shorts and went downstairs. "Quien?" Adimar asked Alejandro.
"Merisol."
Adimar said nothing for he was floored by that answer. "Que quiere?" (What does she want?) He tried to ask it as nicely as possible.
"Para conocer a mijo," (To see Paco.) Alejandro answered.
"Pienso que no puede," Adimar simply said that she couldn't. It would be a long night for the two brothers.
I was surprised at how quickly I finished George's picture. Because she had two almost completely different personalities -- one of the guys, and the girly perky cheerleader -- I decided to draw her as twins. The girly perky George reclined with the back of her head lying on the other George's shoulder. To cover certain part of her body, I used two snakes that wrapped around her and each other. The other George sat leaning forward in the `male hunch'. I had her hair spill over her boobs and her right hand hung off her thigh blocking -- mostly -- her vagina. Both Georges wore the same smirk that said, "Ven aca," or "Come here."
I put my pencil down, happy to be finished. By then it was around midnight; so I decided to call it a night. Drawing that picture of George added to the horniness that tom left me with. I thought about picking up the phone. I do remember one drunken night when Kara and I phone-boned, but then thought against it. I figured Tom was still awake -- he's a night owl -- but I didn't want his parents wondering why I was calling so late all of a sudden. I stripped down to nothing. I sleep in the nude. I reached down towards my erection but rethought it. I would just jack off in the shower in the morning. Granted I woke up in time. My last thoughts before I went to sleep: Tengo un novio. iQue sexy!
That's all for Confusion: Part 2. I hope you liked it. The next chapter will be up soon. El proximo capitulo anuciara pronto. I think I'm gonna leave some translations again. Starting from top down (I won't translate everything cos some words like "sexy" -- figure that out -- don't need it.)
Agarre, yo - I made out (with him). [Agarrar lit. means "to get", I'm using Peruvian slang here.] cocho - Dad [Peruvian slang] Algo esta... - Something is... iMaldigalo! - Damn him! Y tengo mas preguntas - I have more questions. Quieres ser mi novio? - Do you want to be my boyfriend? Era la mas sexy - It was the sexiest. iNo tienes el derecho de decidir nada para el! - You don't have the right to decide anything for him! Pero mi mensaje se recibiria seguramente mejor desde tu - But my message would surely be better received from you.
I hope that clears up some things for people. Remember to send ALL comments to getitright10@yahoo.com.