THE LAST CAESAR 9
USUAL DISCLAIMER
"THE LAST CAESAR" is a gay story, with some parts containing graphic scenes of sex between males. So, if in your land, religion, family, opinion and so on this is not good for you, it will be better not to read this story. But if you really want, or because YOU don't care, or because you think you really want to read it, please be my welcomed guest.
THE LAST CAESAR
By Andrej Koymasky © 2020
Ended writing on December 2nd 2005
Translated by the Author
English text kindly reviewed by Talo Segura
CHAPTER 9
FINALLY A HAPPY LIFE
By now it was a year since Romulus had lived his golden exile. Helvius, Cimon and Icenius, opened a house in Neapolis, they found several boys without any family, petty thieves and beggars, who willingly accepted to come and work for them. In the house of Helvius, which they called «Domus solis» (House of the Sun), the boys were always ensured a good meal, beautiful clothes, a bed, help if they were ill and a cheerful and supportive environment.
The rich and powerful of Neapolis who enjoyed male graces found in the «Domus solis» clean, healthy and safe boys. The earnings were good, better than in Ravenna, so Helvius decided not to go back to stealing, partly because he did not want to risk being jailed and separated from his beloved. Cimon ran the boys and Icenius took care of the house and assured its services helped by those who were not working.
Almost every day Helvius went to visit Romulus, they made love and took long walks around the villa, talking about a thousand things. Moreover, the young man became a sort of external agent, seeking out those things his beloved desired, be it some special food or wine, a manuscript or anything else, as well as bringing him the news from the city.
One day Romulus told him: "Yesterday my mother asked me what's between you and me..."
"Ah. And what did you tell her?"
"I told her that there is love, of course."
Helvius looked at him amused: "And what did she say?"
"She asked me if you're a prostitute."
"And?"
"I told her no, I told her that you are my last subject. All the others, you see, I told her, are here only for the money they receive from me. My beloved, no, he does not want my money. So I pay him with my love."
"But... did she understand that you and I make love, that our love is not only an emotion but also a carnal one?"
"Yes of course. If only, because we always shut ourselves in my room. I think everyone knows it by now, even the lowest slave."
"But is not your mother a faithful follower of Christ?"
"Yes, in fact she wanted a chapel to be set up and she has a Basilian monk come here every Sunday to celebrate the liturgy. Why?"
"And she did not say anything about the fact that you and I are lovers?" Helvius asked in amazement.
"She said... that she will pray to God to forgive us..."
"I do not really see for what the god of Christ's followers should forgive us."
"Well... he seems to be more spiteful than the old pagan gods. It seems that his fun is to prohibit everything... even if they say he is the god of love."
"Like Eros?"
"No, of love... only spiritual, not carnal."
"But between us there are both,. Both the spiritual and the carnal love. Why would he expect only half of the love from us? This god of the followers of Christ is not much better than Eros who cares only for carnal love and he too is the god of only half of our love..." Helvius said.
"I agree with you, my sun. But perhaps if these gods, if they exist... it is not their fault they are so limited, but the fault of their priests. I have not yet found a priest who has been able to talk to me of a god... complete. So I do not believe in any of the gods they talk to me about."
Suddenly Helvius changed the subject: "How many things have happened in these two years, since we met..."
"The only thing noteworthy for me... was when you appeared in my life. The only beautiful thing. For the rest... I went from one jeweled prison to another. First the house in Rome, then the villa in Classis, then the palace of the Caesars in Ravenna, finally here in the Castrum Lucullanum... One prison after another. Only you brought the light, the warmth, the love into my life."
"And yet... when I saw you the first time... I had not seen anything else in you but a delightful boy to be enjoyed. It is you who have seized my heart, who has stirred up in me love, the true, complete, spiritual and carnal love."
"I was scared when you came behind me and grabbed me..."
"But you immediately surrendered to my desire."
"Because you raised mine and because I felt I could trust you."
"A thief and a pimp?"
"I did not know this; but your eyes were good."
"And when you surprised me stealing in your room, there in the villa in Classis? When I did confess to you how I made my living?"
"At that point, I was already in love with you." Romulus told him with a sweet smile. "You never told me about your friends, your boys..."
"My friends... the only ones, real friends, are Cimon and Icenius, his boyfriend, those who helped me climb up to your window in the palace of the Caesars and who came with me to Neapolis... Cimon is a Greek, he was the cabin boy on a warship of the Eastern emperor. On board, more than cleaning... he had to let himself be fucked by sailors and soldiers... several times a day. Until he could not take it anymore and he ran away. I found him and took him with me."
"Was he your boyfriend?"
"Yes, until I met you, until I fell in love with you. Then he became simply a friend for me... a great friend."
"It was he who pretended to be a Greek merchant and brought me your message ?"
"Exact. Cimon feared for me and tried to discourage me in my plans to see you, but then he was always there to help me to come to you. He is truly a precious friend. The other true friend is Icenius, or Icenix, son of a slave of the Gauls. Cimon saw him at the slave market in Ravenna, and fell in love with him. So, he broke my balls until I helped him buy the boy slave. They fell in love. In the end he made him a freeman. They're so cute - it's nice to see that and how much they love each other."
"And the other boys? You told me that here in Neapolis you have gathered some of them..."
"Yes. They are all lonely boys, abandoned by everyone, who survived by stealing, begging, selling themselves for a few copper coins, lost youngsters. I'm not saying we help them only out of generosity, altruistically: we make a good profit. However, having them living with us, we take care of them, they are clean, well fed, they have a home... and they have good clients who have to respect them."
"Isn't it sad that they have to sell themselves to live?"
"Everyone sells themselves in order to live. Intellectuals sell their wits; artisans sell the work of their hands; soldiers sell their lives... Everyone sells what he has... These boys sell their ability to give pleasure, a job like any other..."
"And I, to live, what did I sell?" Romulus asked him.
"Your freedom, my flower."
"So... are we all... prostitutes?"
"Yes, everyone... therefore no one. Prostitution is giving sexual pleasure in exchange for money or gifts or other things... thus, how many wives are actually just prostitutes? Perhaps for only one man rather than many. Like the artist who works for a single client and not for everybody."
"So... in one way or another, in your opinion, Helvius, is there anything else in the world but prostitution?"
"Yes. I can give you a work of art to make you happy without asking for anything in return. I can work for you because you need help, without getting anything back. I can give you sexual pleasure because you are important to me, without being paid..."
"But in exchange you have my love..."
"Because, in our case, you too want to give me sexual pleasure without asking me anything in return. This is true love: giving to one another, without demanding anything."
"So, he who loves does not prostitute himself, while everyone else does?"
"This is what I think, what I believe. Even with the gods, rituals are performed in return for protection. There are those who prostitute themselves to one god or another."
"And the gods... do they prostitute themselves to men?"
"Certainly, in fact if nobody adored them... they would cease to exist. And the priests are their pimps."
"A curious philosophy..." Romulus commented.
Helvius laughed: "I did not think I was a philosopher. But... yes, only what you do for love is not prostitution... or to use a less derogatory term, it is not trade."
"And do you love me?"
"I do my best, my flower. I hope to always know how to love you."
"It seems to me that you are succeeding, my sun!" Romulus told him with a warm smile, coloured with desire.
They were lying on the grass, almost on the shore of the small island, on the opposite side of the Campania coast, looking towards the open sea. In front of them the patrol passed, and they made the military salute to Romulus.
"Do you see them? They are my jailers but also my protectors. They control me but they also ensure that nobody comes to free me or to hurt me. At the same time they treat me with the respect due to a person of rank."
Helvius watched the military patrol walk away. Then he stretched out his arm, wrapped it over the shoulders of Romulus, pulling him to himself and kissing him tenderly. After a while they parted, got up and went to the villa. They did not need words, they both knew they had to love each other with their whole body.
They climbed the steps two by two, feeling a growing rush as they approached their destination. They locked themselves in Romulus's beautiful room, undressed each other, embraced and kissed each other with increasing passion.
"Only when you are with me, in me, do I feel truly free, my sun!" the boy murmured, luring him to the bed.
"Only when I am with you, in you, I feel truly alive, my flower!" the young man whispered, lying on top of him.
They brought each other, with quiet passion, towards the peaks of pleasure, until Romulus, unable to resist any longer, offered himself to his man. Helvius began his slow and vigorous descent into the welcoming cave of mysteries, enjoying the slight reddening of his boyfriend's cheeks, the only purple that Romulus was proud and happy to wear; enjoying the flourishing of his happy smile while welcoming him into himself; rejoicing in the subtle shudder with which he received him.
"Are you happy, my flower?" he asked in a moving whisper, when he was completely inside him.
"Yes, because I am yours!"
Helvius smiled at him softly and slowly began to withdraw, then to immerse himself in the boy, in a kind, passionate, virile, dance of love and pleasure. The hands of one roamed over the beautiful body of the other, all their senses were extended to enjoy the beloved and his enjoyment.
Their gazes, lost in each other's eyes, gradually became brighter, slowly warmer, as they gave each other pleasure. The god of love, of complete love, of carnal and spiritual love, lived in them, thanks to them.
The cares of life, its hardships, were made bearable, they were forgotten, disappeared, as their bodies, so intimately united, experienced and expressed the joy of their souls.
"You are mine!" Romulus murmured.
"You are mine!" Helvius echoed.
"And I'm yours..." the boy added with great pleasure.
"And I yours, my flower..." the young man happily nodded.
The human being always yearns for perfection and is never fully content with what he can do, except when he loves and can give substance to his love by joining the beloved.
The two young lovers felt that, at least for those sweet moments, they were able to reach as close to perfection as possible for such a finite and limited being as the human being.
The whole cosmos poured its mysterious energies into the two strong and fresh bodies, so intimately connected, until they were no longer able to contain themselves and let flow from their bodies waves of strong, soft jets.
"Oh, my beloved!" Romulus panted mildly.
"Oh my love!" murmured Helvius passionately, while their bodies trembled with the intensity of their orgasm.
Satisfied, for the moment sated, they abandoned themselves in a languid embrace, exchanging light kisses, smiling, caressing each other. Slowly they descended together from the summit they had just conquered and from which they could admire what the eyes can never see: the sweet landscape of the soul in love with the beloved.
The grateful awareness of the love of the other made them feel strong, ready again to face gladly the troubles of life. Their embrace broke apart but they still admired the virile nakedness of their life partner, deeply astonished at having been able to enjoy him.
Every religion celebrates its mysteries... even Love. Every religion promises its faithful ecstasy, even Love. But every religion demands full submission from its faithful, while Love only leads to full self-giving.
"Mysterious are the ways of fate..." Romulus whispered thoughtfully.
"Yes?"
"Think of the thousand little things, each of them quite insignificant, which led us to meet that afternoon in Classis... to discover love. If only one of them did not go in the right way, we could be two more beings wandering in the unknown..."
"So everything was written, was everything marked, are we are nothing but pawns on a chessboard on which fate plays?"
"To play on a chessboard, you have to be two, my sun."
"And who is he, the other, the one who plays with fate the games from which we depend?"
"It is us, my beloved, depending on how far we are able to make the right moves, whether the game turns in our favour or against us."
"But fate... knows the rules of the game and all the possible variations and outcomes."
"Yes, but we can learn, master them as we play. As we are doing, you and me. And we are two to face the match with fate. In fact, we are three."
"And who is the third one?"
"Love."
CONTINUES IN CHAPTER 10
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