The Supermodel and The Transvestite

The Supermodel and the Transvestite

By Red Janissary redjanissary@yahoo.com

Authors Message:

I was working on two different stories but somehow this new story just entered my head and I found it very intriguing. So I decided to put it in the pipeline and make it perhaps my 5th story later down the road.

But the characters of this story just kept lingering in my mind. They would come visit me and entice me to tell their tale. I might sound crazy but as the characters became clearer, I was compelled to write this story.

If you read on you might think "I know where this is heading", well give it a chance -- you might enjoy it. Hell, I was touched.

If you like it, I'm glad to be of service. If you don't, well I'm sorry and I hope I will write something better next time. But I'm just glad that I finally finished telling this tale. So these characters will finally stop visiting me ...

If there are any mistakes in the Russian language spoken by one of the characters, let me know so I can correct them.

***** Chapter 1 "Svetlana Rodin" *****

"I'm sorry Tony," she said.

"Lana, please think about it."

Lana kneeled down to face the man who had asked for her hand in marriage. This was the second time he had done so. She felt uneasy rejecting him again but it was an easy call to make.

"I like you a lot Tony, but you are not the one."

Tony's heart sank. But he did not capitulate as he was not an ordinary man.

"Not the one?" he asked. "Your soul mate ideology is a myth Lana. Sometimes you just have to take what opportunities life presents and make the best of it -- I know I can make you happy, just give me a chance."

Lana knew Tony was not the man she was looking for. She closed the small box that contained a ring with the largest diamond she had ever seen in her life. Her search would have to continue.

"So is destiny Tony, yet I choose to believe it."

"Who are looking for Lana?" he frowned. "And what if you never find him?"

Lana kissed Tony on the cheek and stood up. She had already made up her mind and there was nothing else he could say.

"I will find him," she said. "I'll see you around Tony. I need to take my walk."

Tony watched the woman he loved slip away from him. As she walked, a gentle breeze lifted her long brunette hair and ruffled the sky blue dress she was wearing. He knew it would be impossible to get over her, nobody else was more beautiful.

"I love you Lana!" he yelled. "I always will!"

She turned around, placed her hand over her heart and smiled.

"Ya bUdu vsegdA lyubIt' tebyA Tony" she yelled back.

"What?"

"I will always love you Tony!" she repeated, in English.

Lana felt bad about breaking Tony's heart. He was a good man.

"Oh Tony, I'm really sorry" she thought. "But he will get over me. He is a strong man, a self made billionaire for heaven's sake -- he will be fine."

Tony had proposed to her at the city central park. He knew Lana loved this place more than any within this concrete jungle. It was a great escape from the redundant and meaningless routine of urban life. Some people called her old fashioned, while others simply thought she was a hopeless romantic. But she didn't mind what people thought of her. As long as she was true to herself, that was enough to make her happy.

As she lost herself within her little paradise, a falling white petal grazed her face. Lana looked up and then noticed that the Yoshino Cherry trees where now in full spring bloom. This was her favorite time of the year.

A strong breeze caused the branches to sway and more petals began dropping around her. Lana smiled as she found herself amidst a rain of descending blooms. She opened her arms, tilted her head back and walked in circles to bask in this wonderful display of nature. Tony should have proposed in this area, it would have been more romantic. The result would not change, but it would have been more memorable.

"Only a hopeless romantic would think of things like these" she thought. "Oh am I doomed to be frustrated?"

Lana sat on a park bench and watched the visual treat continue. She looked around and caught an image of herself on a large billboard. She was wearing a tiny two piece bikini that left most of her famous body uncovered.

"God, I hate my legs," she thought.

Lana was wrong of course. Everyone loved her legs and her entire body for that matter. At 23, she was already one of the most famous and highly paid supermodels in the world. She had Russian parents but she was born and raised in this country.

It did not take long for people to notice that she was the rarest of beauties. Her well known and powerful agent discovered her, of all places, at a spelling bee championship. Gil recommended that they change her name to sound something more memorable but she would have none of that.

"If they can remember my body, they should at least know how to spell my name," she argued.

And she proved her agent wrong. Svetlana Rodin quickly became a name that almost everyone could spell. People who knew her called her Lana. But as far as the industry was concerned, she was known by a single name: Svetlana.

Aside from her perfect body, Lana had one of the most beautiful faces the modeling industry had seen in years. But looks could only get you so far in this profession. She was also very fortunate to be gifted with the natural talents that great models possess. Lana had remarkable body control, an uncanny ability to change her appearance and an amazing camera sense that made her a perennial favorite among the best photographers.

Lana's gaze moved to another billboard with an image of her friend wearing a short black dress. Her name was Maria Tessa de Venecia or "Maritess" as she was popularly known. Although not yet at the same supermodel status as Lana, everyone knew that Maritess would soon attain that status.

"Now that's good legs," she thought.

While admiring her friend's body, Lana realized that she had lost track of time. She looked at her watch and noticed that it was almost time for today's photo shoot.

"It would be nice to see Gwen again," she smiled. "She is so much fun to be with."

Lana reluctantly left her sanctuary and headed towards the concrete jungle. She started thinking of positive things to motivate her for another long and methodical day ahead.

"Back to the grind ...," she sighed.

***** Chapter 2 "The Start of Something Special" *****

"He is taking too long," he thought. "I hope I don't miss the 5 o'clock show."

Keith waited at the living room in Nathan's home. Being cousins and senior high school classmates made them instant partners in crime. They have done their silly and foolish share of adventures but nothing like what was about to happen today.

"Waiting for someone is so boring!"

Keith looked around and picked up today's paper and started reading it to pass the time. After digesting all the news that interested him, he flipped to the crossword puzzle section and was disappointed that it had already been filled up.

"Hey Nathan, how much longer," he yelled.

"A few more minutes!" Nathan responded.

"This is stupid," Keith thought.

His cousin had made a stupid bet with him. Nathan's passion was to be a great "female illusionist". Keith had always known that his cousin was a transvestite but that never bothered him as Nathan would always perform this activity in private. So as long as he never had to deal with his cousin in drag, that was just fine with him.

But Nathan told Keith several days ago that he could now impersonate a woman so well, he could even give him a hard-on. The idea sounded so ridiculous to Keith that he was even willing to bet money on it -- a seemingly sure win proposal.

So that was the bet. If Nathan could give Keith a hard-on without touching him, Keith would have to take him out on a date as a woman. But if Nathan failed, he would forgive Keith's one hundred fifteen dollar debt.

"It's a no-brainer," Keith thought. "I just suckered him from my debt."

"Okay here I come," Nathan said. "Watch me come down the stairway."

Keith gazed up the stairs and saw a beautiful young woman at the top. Her pretty face had very heavy makeup and it was surrounded by a mass of wavy and long blonde hair. She was wearing a red halter dress with a thin fabric that hugged her body tight to show her feminine curves.

The young woman took her time as she descended down the stairs. She wanted him to see her long feminine legs sliding out the slits of the dress. Her red high heels planted themselves along the steps with care until she finally reached the main floor.

Keith was in disbelief. How could this possibly be Nathan? He started getting a hard-on and this troubled him greatly. It did not bother him that his cousin would win the bet; he was more troubled that a man had aroused his penis.

As the beautiful young woman came closer, he smelled her intoxicating fragrance. He also saw the cleavage of her breasts. Breasts! That's it, he had been conned -- it was a scam! Keith stood up, walked pass the woman and looked to see if Nathan was watching them from upstairs.

"Nathan you cheater!" he yelled. "She is a real woman, I see her breasts!"

"Do you like my breasts Keith?" Nathan said from behind him.

Keith turned his neck around. Nathan was not there. There was only that beautiful woman in her seductive red dress.

"It's me dear cousin," said Nathan. "And why would I cheat?"

Keith could no longer deny the obvious as he saw the young woman behind him speak with Nathan's voice. He felt terrified as he believed that this manhood was being threatened. Keith could not accept that Nathan could have this effect on him. He bit his tongue and almost cried from the pain. This great discomfort killed his arousal -- he cheated.

"Well I don't have a hard-on" he said.

Keith turned around to face the young woman in the red dress. He proudly displayed his bulge-less pants.

"See?"

Nathan smiled as he saw his cousin already had a hard-on as he walked by him. Keith was cheating. But that was okay, Nathan knew he would win the day.

"We shall see Keith," he thought. "Let's see you handle this."

"Do you like my breasts Keith?" said the young woman. "You naughty boy ..."

Keith was surprised to hear a female voice from the woman he knew was Nathan. She came closer to him and he begun to smell her sweet scent again.

"You can't touch me," he said. "Remember the rules."

"I know the rules my love," she said. "And you must look at me at all times."

Keith got very nervous as the woman moved right beside him. She ran her hand across her long golden hair and posed her body at a sharp angle. Her body started moving in a very seductive motion as she started touching herself.

"Do you want to touch me Keith?" she said. "I know you want to."

Keith bit his tongue again -- it hurt a lot. But her voice was very enticing and he could not help but stare at her red lips in motion.

"You can kiss me Keith," she continued. "You can do anything you want to me."

Keith clenched his fists and he started sweating.

"This is Nathan!" He thought. "This is a man!"

"I am a woman Keith," she cooed. "A woman who wants you ..."

Keith moved his strong arms around the young woman and squeezed her body against his. He looked at her pretty face and then kissed her. She kissed him back and then wrapped her arms around his neck.

His hand moved up her body and started squeezing her right breast. It felt wrong, something was not right. Keith had a girlfriend before and he knew what a real breast felt like. What he was touching was not even close.

Almost at the same time, his left hand wandered down the woman's body. He lifted her skirt and then rubbed his hand over her panties. The familiar feeling of a soft flat contour was not there. Keith felt something cylindrical. It was hard and it was bent backwards.

"Oh my God, its Nathan's dick," he thought.

Keith separated himself from the woman who had seduced him. The illusion was broken and he was now free from her spell. He moved away from her and sat back on the sofa where he bowed his head in shame.

"Damn, I should work on my Tuck," thought Nathan.

Nathan adjusted his dress and walked towards the sofa. He felt bad about what happened as he had no intention on humiliating his cousin. It was just supposed to be an innocent game but Keith lost control. Even Nathan would not have imagined that his cousin would kiss him. But that was Keith, always impulsive and passionate.

"Poor Keith," he thought. "Why did you have to kiss me?"

Keith felt the young woman sit beside him. He felt confused and ashamed.

"I guess you win Nathan," he sighed.

"I'm sorry Keith," Nathan said. "I didn't know that would happen."

Nathan wanted to do something to cheer his cousin up. Keith's sadness was starting to make him feel guilty.

"Hey I never said you would have to pay for that date," he said. "It's all on me. Let's go to your favorite place."

Keith looked at his cousin again. Nathan's face was beautiful and he began seeing some traces of him underneath the thick and glamorous makeup.

"How do you do it?" he asked.

Nathan pulled the top of his dress down to let his cousin look underneath his cleavage. There was a very tight tape around his chest that squeezed his pectoral muscles together to create the illusion of a female cleavage. Below that, some pads to create the shape of a breast on the dress. As long as the mind believed the cleavage was real, the contour of the breast was enough to complete the trickery.

"It's an illusion," he said. "And around my sexy is waist is a very tight girdle."

"So all you need is the right tools?" asked Keith.

"That's only part of it Keith. To be a good female illusionist you also have to be gifted with the right body."

Nathan raised his left leg and pulled the dress up to let Keith see its entirety. The leg was incased in a sheer silk stocking. It was long, skinny and hairless.

"I am fortunate to have skinny legs, arms and a petite torso" he continued. "My oval face, sharp nose and full lips also make a good female face with the right makeup."

Keith was getting aroused again by looking at his cousin's long feminine leg stretched before him. He wanted to touch and trace its smooth contours.

"As for the voice," Nathan continued. "It's hard but with enough practice I was finally able to come up with a convincing falsetto."

"Can you remove your wig?" Keith asked.

"Maybe later dear cousin, after our date," Nathan smiled.

"Okay," said Keith. "But with what name shall I call you when go out in public?"

Nathan prepared himself for his first time out in public as a woman. He adjusted his dress again, checked his hair and then his face. His female voice was also ready.

"You can call me whatever you want baby!"

And Keith called her Nat. They went out to his favorite place at their small town's downtown district. It was a small cozy restaurant that served the best steak in town. Both of them were nervous but Nat passed perfectly. After dinner they watched a movie at the area's only theater multiplex.

Their date went well and there were hardly any awkward moments. Keith was surprised that being with Nat was just as fun as being with Nathan. They were the same person of course, except that Nat looked like a beautiful young woman.

After the movie, Keith drove his cousin to a small hut in the middle of nowhere. It was located next to a stream that was part of his father's land. As kids, this was their secret hideout. Growing up, they would drink beer and read forbidden magazines here without interruption. This was their spot.

The cousins got out of the car and sat on a long wooden bench that they had made many summers ago. They both gazed at the clear night sky to admire the blanket of endless stars and the bright full moon. It was a good night to be out.

"I had a wonderful time Keith," she said. "Thanks."

Keith observed Nat under the bright moonlight. The lower illumination made the illusion of the woman even more convincing. She was more beautiful now than she had been all day. An uncontrollable urge possessed him that took away all his modesty and pride.

"Nathan?" he asked. "Can I ask you a big favor?"

"Sure Keith, what is it?"

"My hard-on has never stopped since we left the house and I can't stand it anymore," he said. "Can you do your seductive look while I masturbate?"

Nathan did notice his cousin's hard-on during their date. Keith would adjust his pants often while he continued eying his crotch most of the night. But Nathan also had a hunger that needed to be fed. Tucked underneath his panties, was a very aroused cock that needed to ejaculate. His penis went erect as soon as he put on this amazing red dress. Wearing female clothes had that effect on him.

"I can do better than that Keith."

"Huh?"

Nathan switched gears and prepared his female voice again.

"Can I suck your dick Keith?" asked Nat.

"Hell no!" thought Keith. "I'm not fucking gay!"

"Yes!" said Keith.

Nat kneeled before her cousin and unzipped his pants. Her hands took his large erect penis and guided it into her mouth. She heard her cousin make indiscernible noises as she slid her mouth back and forth to begin the blowjob.

Keith looked down and saw a beautiful young woman sucking his cock. There was no trace of Nathan so this made it easy for him to accept. As the erotic sensations started building up, he moved his hands around the woman's head and grasped her long blonde hair. This only intensified his fantasy that she was a real woman.

As Nat continued sucking her cousin's dick, her right hand released her own penis from her panties and started stroking it. It did not take long for her cousin to reach his orgasm. As the first streams of semen came into her mouth, she was unsure on what to do next. If she released her mouth, Keith's ejaculation might sprinkle some semen on her lovely red dress. That would be unacceptable.

"Well my cousin is clean," she thought. "I'm sure its okay if I just swallow it all."

And swallow it all she did. It was warm, sticky and salty. But she was surprised that it felt very erotic and she enjoyed the experience very much. Nat reached her own orgasm rightly thereafter and made sure to point her penis downwards as to let her own semen fall harmlessly to the ground below. With both of them sexually gratified, Nat fixed her dress and sat beside Keith.

A rush of emotions engulfed the two cousins after what just occurred. They were confused, bewildered and a little bit scared. The repetitive sounds from the insects in the fields betrayed the sudden silence between them.

"Oh God," thought Nathan. "What have I done?"

Nathan was surprised as Keith placed his arm around his shoulder. He welcomed his cousin's comforting embrace and he leaned into him. The cousins felt at peace with their bodies together. Again they gazed up at the blanket of endless stars and the bright full moon. It was the start of something special.

***** Chapter 3 "Outed" *****

"And he was still wearing my bloody dress!" chuckled Gwen.

The three women around her started laughing, only Gwen could make a serious story funny. A deranged stalker had been caught as she returned to her London home. Despite having barely escaped serious harm, she still found humor in her ordeal.

But that was Gwendolyn MacKellar. She was always funny. Her face radiated with charisma and nobody shined brighter. At the old modeling age of 33, she was a legend in the industry. The British beauty was your typical blonde goddess. But what set her apart was her jovial nature and unparalleled charisma.

Gwen felt excited about the upcoming photo shoot. She knew that she would someday look back at this moment and reflect upon it with great pride. The lingerie company that organized this shoot had gathered the most highly desired models in the industry. This project was a very big deal.

She smiled at her friends as they continued laughing. Four of the most popular models in the world gathered together as a crew of hair and makeup specialists went about making them even prettier. They were only wearing very small thongs which left the rest of their entire bodies naked. This was not an unusual sight for an insider of the industry. But the models checked each other out to see where they ranked in the vicious model food chain.

Gwen studied the newcomer, Maritess. The 20 year old Brazilian "mestiza" looked stunning. She was the second most beautiful woman in the room. Coming out of nowhere, she was an instant hit in the industry. But Maritess worked hard to deserve all the attention and accolades she was receiving. What held her back was that she was shy, timid and reserved.

"She is new," Gwen thought. "Give her a chance to adjust. Eventually, she will come out of her shell."

Next to the newcomer was Charmaine "Char" Savoie, the South African. Her father was a French diplomat while her mother was a famous South African black model. This racial mix produced one of the most exotic beauties the world has yet seen. A former Miss World crown holder, she was a symbol of how far the country had gone since the apartheid regimes. Only recently turning 28, Char was at the apex of her career and she was doing very well. But she could be difficult to work with at times.

And finally Gwen examined her good friend Lana. She was clearly the Alpha Female among them and everyone knew it. Even in her prime, Gwen never looked that beautiful. Being only 23, Lana had not yet reached her true potential and many followed with interest as she continued to blossom with each passing year.

Gwen never envied Lana as she was always sweet, honest and nice. These admirable traits made Gwen very fond of her. Lana's only weakness was that she was a hopeless romantic which often made her an impractical idealist.

"Ready in five ladies," yelled the famous photographer named Mitch.

The supermodels stood up and started donning their lingerie and high heels. They scrutinized their own reflections as the hairstylists completed some finishing touches on their glorious long manes.

Before they could begin, the project manager summoned the three veteran supermodels for a meeting. Something felt wrong and all of them knew it. But only Lana voiced her concern.

"What about Maritess?" asked Lana. "What is this about?"

"We have different people to talk with Maritess and her agent," replied Ted. "Come with me now ladies."

Ted led the three models into a small office and closed the door. The women were only wearing skimpy lingerie but that did not distract Ted.

"We are changing the shoot, Maritess is out," he said.

"Why Ted?" asked Lana. "Why?"

"Is there something we are supposed to know Ted?" asked Gwen.

"I would rather not say," he said.

"We will find out sooner or later Ted, you might as well tell us now" said Char.

Ted paused for a few seconds as even he still had a difficult time believing what he was about to say. He thought he had seen it all, and this one surprised him. But Char was right, they will find out sooner of later anyway. They might as well know now.

"We have just learned ..." he said. "Maritess is a man."

The three women were speechless. One of the most beautiful models they have ever worked with was a man. Lana and Char had already spent time with Maritess on other shoots. They had seen her close up and scrutinized her body. She was stunning and it was inconceivable that she was not a natural woman. They had seen their fair share of gorgeous transsexuals, but nothing as beautiful as Maritess.

"There are many t-girls working in the industry Ted" Lana said. "I don't see the problem."

"She is a pre-op Lana," he replied. "There is a penis between her legs and this company will not have someone with a penis model our products."

That new revelation was even more shocking. Maritess already had a lot of lingerie and swimsuit photo shoots and runway shows under her belt. If she did have a penis, she was very good at hiding it.

"She has done it before Ted and she was magnificent," said Lana. "Nothing about her has changed, I don't see why you should treat her differently now."

"I know my business Lana," he countered. "We will not sell more lingerie if it was being worn by a she-male."

"This isn't right Ted!"

Gwen walked towards Lana and placed her hand on her friend's back.

"You know he is right Lana," she said. "This is a business so don't take it personally. Its all about the money and Maritess is no longer bankable."

"And what do you think about this Char?" Lana asked.

"Personally, I am offended Lana," she frowned. "I have been fully naked with this man several times before and I feel betrayed. He has a penis Lana. He is not one of us."

Lana could not believe that her friends were being blind. Maybe she was being an impractical idealist again but she did not care. Her heart was telling her this was wrong and she was compelled to do something about it.

"This is wrong!" she yelled. "You shouldn't treat her like this!"

Lana stormed out of the room and slammed the door. She was livid and she could not remember the last time she got mad like this.

"I'm not going to let this happen."

***** Chapter 4 "The Perfect Summer" *****

Nathan got out of his car and walked towards the small hut. He was dressed as a woman again. Around his arm was a small basket with some sandwiches, fruit and chocolate cake. Keith would bring the drinks but Nathan brought some cold bottles of beer anyway.

He placed the basket down and waited for his beloved. So much had changed since they fell in love here several months ago. They decided to continue their romance in private. Every Friday, after class, they would meet here and make love. Saturday was even more special. He would dress up as a woman at an earlier time so Keith could pick him up around lunch. This would give them the whole day to spend time with each other. And as Saturday ended, both of them would eagerly count the days for the cycle to repeat again.

With the end of classes, summer became a magical time between them. They would work during the day and save up for college. But almost every night, they would see each other and make love. It was more fun now since they had more money at their disposal. Nathan bought fancier dresses and got better at his female illusionist craft. And Keith would sometimes surprise him with a weekend getaway to the nearest big city.

Nathan opened a beer as he got thirsty and bored. He did not have to wait long as Keith arrived before he emptied his first bottle. His beloved came out of his car carrying some cold beer and coca cola.

"Damn, he is so handsome," Nathan thought.

Keith was tall, muscular and he had a warm soul. The young man always kept his blond hair cut short to show his handsome face. But it was his smile that Nathan remembered the most. That smile which always lifted his heart.

"I'm sorry I'm late," said Keith. "One of my father's horses got seriously injured and he had to put the poor thing down."

"That's okay my love," smiled Nathan. "I don't mind waiting for you ..."

Keith smiled and looked at his girlfriend. She was wearing a short pink dress with matching pink high heels. Her legs were flawless and he wanted to run his hands across them again. She liked it when he did that.

"Damn, she is so pretty," he thought.

Keith was amazed at how Nat had become more beautiful. She had a new expensive wig that gave her a very long and elegant blond mane. With theatrical makeup to hide all of Nathan's imperfections, she now had a face that even real women would envy.

"You look beautiful Nat," he said. "You are the prettiest girl in town."

She giggled and looked down as if she was modest. What her beloved had just said made her stomach feel funny. Only he could make her feel that way. She was very much in love.

Keith placed his hand on her chin, lifted her face and looked into her eyes. He wrapped his other hand around her sexy body and pulled her towards him. Her new perfume made her smell like a very classy woman. It made him want her more.

"I love you Nat," he said.

"And I love you Keith," she smiled.

They kissed and their hearts started beating madly. Both of them could not deny that there was magic between them.

"Are you hungry my love?" she asked.

"Can we make love first?" he grinned.

"Oh, you naughty boy!" she teased.

On that request, she walked inside the small hut and placed her hands on an open window. She looked at the sunset on the wide open plains. Nat never tired of seeing the sunset from here, it was spectacular.

Nat smiled as Keith entered the small hut and closed the door. She placed her hands around her short skirt and lifted it up to reveal her panties. Keith ran his hands across her long legs. Her body stiffened while she giggled. He embraced her from behind and started kissing the back of her neck. His right hand moved over her breasts while his left hand squeezed and tickled her hip. She tilted her head back and reached backwards to run her hands on his short blond hair.

"Fuck me Keith," she said.

Keith pulled down her panties and inserted his erect penis into her asshole. This caused Nat's body to shake as it was both painful and pleasurable. Her boyfriend's dick was huge and she never quite got used to it. Nat cried out as if she had been hurt. But Keith wasn't worried as they had done this many times already.

He pumped his dick back and forth into her ass and she continued crying out in pain. But there was more pleasure than pain, and she did not want him to stop. She moved her hand to clench his hand that was groping her breasts. Holding his hand seemed to give her comfort. With her other hand, she grasped her own dick and started stroking it.

As Keith continued to pump her, Nat could feel an amazing dual buildup of erotic pleasure. She could not decide which felt better. Was it from her boyfriend's penis that was rubbing against the prostate deep inside her ass? Or was it from her penis that she was now eagerly stroking? It was a no-brainer. The ass of course, the prostate was the male G-spot. But she decided to stroke her penis anyway since she wanted to have a double orgasm.

With Nat's screams of pain and pleasure growing in intensity, Keith knew that she would climax soon. This was good for he could not hold out much longer. He had been concentrating on delaying his orgasm as he did not want to disappoint his girlfriend.

And Nat finally came. The Anal orgasm came first. It rocked her body with massive shockwaves. The toes inside her high heels involuntary curled inwards and her hands clenched whatever it held even tighter. Nat was bombarded with physical pleasure and it drove her crazy. But there was even more to come as her penis started to ejaculate. The dual orgasm caused her body to twist and jerk madly. Nathan lost control and started moaning his delight with his male voice.

But that did not bother Keith as he loved Nathan very much. With his girlfriend now in throes of her dual orgasm, he decided to finally release what he had been delaying. Keith buried his head onto her long blonde hair as he ejaculated inside her asshole. He inhaled her sweet perfume that was all over her long mane. This only heightened the sensual experience of his mighty orgasm.

As Nathan felt a warm liquid deep in his ass, he started to feel weak and dizzy from the energy he had expended. The 4 inch high heels he was wearing as it tilted sideways and he lost his balance. This caught him by surprise and his body started falling. He reached out for the base of the open window but missed.

"Nathan!" yelled Keith.

Keith grabbed Nathan's belly with his strong arm and stopped his fall. As his girlfriend recovered her footing, she faced him and they started laughing.

"I'm sorry my love," she said. "Did I ruin your orgasm?"

"No baby, I was done," he smiled. "Be careful, next time."

"Are you hungry?" she asked.

"You bet."

It got dark after they ate and they welcomed the night with enthusiasm. Keith fixed up a huge think blanket outside of the hut and they lay together watching the infinite stars and the bright moon.

"What is your greatest dream my love?" Nathan asked.

"After college?" Keith asked.

"After anything ..."

"Well, I want to take over my father's stable" he said. "And breed me a true champion."

"That's nice ..."

"Horses are magnificent," Keith continued. "They have so much power, grace and beauty."

"When you do that," Nathan said. "Will you let me ride your champion?"

"Of course," he responded. "What is your greatest dream Nathan?"

Nathan giggled and covered his face. He felt ashamed, but he told Keith anyway.

"Don't laugh," he said. "It's a simple dream"

"I won't."

"My dream is to walk the isles of that small white chapel downtown as a bride."

"Who are you marrying in your dream?" Keith asked.

"You, of course," he giggled. "Who else would I?"

"That's a good dream Nathan but you know the laws here won't allow us to marry."

"I know," Nathan said. "That is why it is a dream."

Keith kissed Nathan as he was flattered by his cousin's dream. They embraced and started kissing. They would make love again and see each other the day after. The cousins knew they only had two more weeks before college would separate them. But they did not let that dampen their spirits as they were experiencing the happiest moments in their lives.

It was the perfect summer.

***** Chapter 5 "Inner Beauty" *****

Maritess sobbed alone in a small room. As a continuous stream of tears gushed out of from her eyes, the fine makeup on her face began to wash out.

But she was still very beautiful. Her Mother's ethnic skin tone gave her an eternal tan that most women would spend hours to acquire. Combine that with a gorgeous face and perfect body that was distinctively European, she was a prime example of why mestizas can be so lovely.

Only minutes ago, she was one of the most desired women in the world. But that all changed once they discovered her secret. She had a dick between her legs. Even though it had yet to be seen as it remained skillfully hidden, the mere thought of its presence was enough for most people to find her revolting.

Maria Tessa was born as a boy and he was named Miguel. But at the age of 4, the young boy already knew that he was different. He felt he was a girl even though the whole world disagreed. For that he was ridiculed and humiliated as he grew up. The constant pain, hate and emptiness drove him to take his own life. But luckily, he survived and his parents finally understood him.

So at the age of 12, he started his metamorphosis with hormones. His wealthy parents removed him from school and changed his identity. Miguel soon disappeared as Maritess came out from her cocoon. Once she turned 17, everyone who saw her would be blown away by her beauty. It would only be a matter of time before the right people would take notice and make the right offer.

Her parents were against her wishes of becoming a model. But it was her dream and passion so they eventually relented. She made her modeling debut at the age of 18. Maritess took the world by storm and she had the time of her life. But people get jealous and they start talking, a secret that big was just impossible to hide.

Everyone would now look at her differently and that hurt her very much. She did not care about losing money since she had been born into wealth. Maritess just wanted to feel loved. She felt it when she would walk the runway, with the outpouring of admiration from the whole crowd. Or when men would admire her lovely pictures in the magazines and the large billboards, she felt special. But sometimes, it could be as simple as an admirer whistling at her as she walked in the street. She just needed to be loved.

"But all of that would be gone now," she thought. "I'm just a faggot again."

As Maritess continued crying, Lana entered the small room and also felt sad.

"Hey ..." said Lana. "It's okay ... I still love you."

Lana sat beside her friend and stroked her hair. Maritess had long and wavy light brown hair that had streaks of blond highlights.

"There is always a reason for everything that happens," she said. "Many good things are still in your future -- you'll see ..."

Lana pulled Maritess into her arms and embraced her. Maritess kept on crying and she buried her head on Lana's shoulder. As Lana remained with her friend and continued to console her, the door of the small room opened and the photographer looked inside.

"Lana, we will be starting in 10 minutes," Mitch said. "Get ready."

"I'm not going Mitch" she said.

"What?"

"If she is out, so am I!"

"Are you crazy? You signed a contract!"

"Tell Ted he can sue my sexy ass!" she yelled.

Mitch ran back to Ted and relayed Lana's message. This caught Ted by surprise as he had not been expecting this from his favorite model. Since she started at the age of 14, Lana had always been the infallible professional. Now she was being rebellious to have her wishes followed. Has Lana finally turned into a Diva?

Ted weighed his options. They could re-schedule the shoot and he could book different models to replace the two. It sounded simple but he knew it just would not work. As far as his vision for this project was concerned, Lana was irreplaceable.

"I know what to do!"

He smiled as an innovative solution entered his mind. Let Lana win the battle but not the war.

"Let Lana have her shoot with the tranny," he said. "And we can digitally edit the fucker out in postproduction."

"That's a good idea Ted," Mitch said. "We can do that."

And Lana had her way. But it would not be as easy as she had thought. Gwen and Char wanted no part in her moral crusade. They sat on the sidelines and watched their friend work with the tranny.

Maritess wanted no part in it either. She knew she was no longer welcome and she just wanted to go home. But Lana would have none of that. She personally fixed her friend's makeup and then dragged her to the stage. The crew eyed them with great interest as they stood there in their high heels wearing nothing but skimpy lingerie that barely covered their amazing bodies.

"C'mon," Lana said. "Don't let them beat you."

Maritess was nervous and she could feel the entire crew eying here crotch. Her penis was still undetectable, but everyone knew it was there. They stared at her trying to find it making her feel like a freak.

"Lana," Maritess said. "I'm scared."

"It's okay," she replied. "Nothing has changed. You are still the same Maria Tessa I know."

"Mother Mary," Maritess prayed. "Please give me strength."

A strong wind from gigantic fans blew against their bodies. Their long manes started waving erratically and then the music started playing. As if a switch had been turned on, Maritess no longer felt fear and started posing for the camera. Within a few seconds, she reminded everyone in the room why she was one of the best.

But right next to her was Lana. She was a master at this profession. People who think modeling was just about being pretty are just plain wrong. You have to see a master at work to understand what it is all about. As Lana began moving her body, she began showing everyone that modeling was an Art.

Her body moved gracefully and she looked like a princess. With one turn, her face changed into a seductress. Then her body moved like a sexy man-eater. She turned again to reveal the face of pure innocence. As she began her new walk, Lana was now everyone's favorite sweetheart.

"Lana is intimidating," Maritess thought. "But I can do that too."

Maritess initially appeared like a lonely and vulnerable woman. Then she changed into a cosmopolitan and snobbish aristocrat. After a short walk and a turn, her face and body language changed again. She was now a demure and elegant beauty queen.

"Good!" yelled Mitch. "Very good ..."

"Not bad Maritess," Lana thought. "This girl has it."

Lana smiled and decided to take it to the next level. Her happy demeanor disappeared and she moved with anger. Lana was now a bitch that you didn't want to mess with. With another turn she started to change again, she grinned as she decided to give the all the men watching a show they would not forget.

Lana danced like lovely showgirl. After noticing the effect she had on the men within the crew, she slowed down the pace and became a very hot stripper. Lana imagined an invisible pole and then danced around it like a horny nymph.

Maritess joined Lana dancing around the invisible pole. It was a sight that made anyone who had a dick become woody. Maritess then decided to use her killer look. She changed into a porn star and began running her hands all over her stunning body. Her face filled with ecstasy as she loved being a woman, touching her own body brought out a glowing transsexual joy.

Mitch felt thrilled with every shot he was taking. He had worked with both of them before, but not at the same time. He was impressed with their chemistry and he knew right away he had captured some of the highlights of the shoot.

"Damn, this is good," he said. "Now together girls ..."

Lana embraced Maritess and then faced sideways. They looked like adorable and loving sisters. It was another amazing shot. She then moved her hands around her friend's ass to make a seductive pose for the camera. This was her hot lesbian lover pose.

"Maritess, place your hands on Lana's breasts," Mitch yelled.

Maritess had done that before, but now she was reluctant.

"Oh my," she thought. "Will she let me?"

Fortunately for her, Lana sensed her hesitation.

"Don't be shy," Lana smiled. "You've done it before."

And Maritess did. Mitch knew instantly that was the best picture of the day. He continued shooting as the models kept on going with the beat of the music. Even the two supermodels who decided not to participate were impressed.

"They are amazing together," Char said.

"Lana blows me away," Gwen said. "She always does."

The two models looked at each other and felt bad. They finally figured out why Lana was so beautiful. Her beauty came from within and that was why they would never be at her level. But they could try...

Gwen and Char walked towards the stage. Each of them kissed and hugged Maritess before joining the shoot. With that gesture they admitted that Lana was right, Maritess was one of them. And they accepted their new sister within their elite clique.

"Amazing," Ted said. "Simply amazing ..."

"I told you Ted," Mitch said. "So what are you going to do?"

Ted looked at all the best photographs that Mitch had compiled for him. Lana was divine, Gwen was radiant, Char was royalty, but Maritess was glowing -- she was a goddess. The model he initially wanted to remove turned out to be the best for this shoot. Either Lana had purposely held back or she had inspired Maritess to perform at a higher level. Whatever the case, it was obvious -- Lana made it happen.

"So do you think the public will still accept Maritess?" Ted asked.

"Her pictures will blow them away. If she continues to perform at this level, she could be as bankable as Lana."

"I am drawn to her too," Ted said. "Fuck it! Let's put her in."

"Lana proved us wrong," Mitch said.

"Yes she did," he smiled. "I guess that is why we love her."

***** Chapter 6 "Paradigm Shift" *****

Nathan waited for Keith in the small hut. It had been many months since they last saw each other. They had gone to different colleges and the separation was very difficult for both of them to endure. They diligently called and wrote each other in the first few months. But as the college workload started to pileup, the number of letters and phone calls started to dwindle.

But everyone comes home for Thanksgiving so this was the time when they could finally see each other again. Nathan wanted this night to be special. He bought a short black cocktail dress that revealed a generous amount of his legs and petite shoulders.

As expected, he wore his most expensive blonde wig and it flowed elegantly across his shoulders. He also spent more than an hour on his makeup alone. Nathan wanted to make sure that he would be very beautiful tonight.

"Where is he?" he thought. "I have missed him so much ..."

Keith finally came and saw her again. That beautiful blonde young woman he had fallen in love with many months ago. She was stunning and her face lit up as she saw him approach.

"Damn, Nathan looks amazing tonight," he thought.

Nathan felt his heart beat faster upon seeing his beloved. He ran towards him and almost lost his balance while running in his high heels. As the cousins met, they embraced each other tightly and Nathan found himself giggling in joy.

"I missed you my love," Nathan said.

Nathan kissed Keith and it seemed that nothing had changed. But something had changed and it soon would be known. Keith slowly pulled away from Nathan and looked into his eyes.

"Nathan," he said. "I need to tell you something ..."

"What is it my love?"

"I met someone Nathan," Keith said. "She makes me very happy."

Nathan stepped backwards until he hit the wall of the hut. It felt like the world had ended. He was devastated.

"Is she a woman?" he asked.

"Yes Nathan," Keith responded. "She is a real woman."

Nathan started sobbing. His heart was broken. He placed his hands over his face to try and cover his grief.

"I'm sorry Nathan," Keith said. "But I need to be true to my heart."

Keith saw how much he had hurt his beloved cousin. It also broke his heart as he still loved Nathan very much. But Keith had already spent many hours thinking about the decision he had made.

He accidentally slept with a woman after too many drinks at a fraternity party. After that, she continued to pursue him and he began to like her. But what would he do about his relationship with Nathan? He realized that he could only love Nathan as a woman. But Nathan was a man and there was no way around this. There were just too many things that his cousin would not be able to provide that a real woman could. It would have never worked in the long run. It was only a matter of time before something like this would happen. Their relationship was doomed from the start.

"I love you Keith," cried Nathan. "Didn't that summer mean anything to you?"

"It did Nathan," Keith said. "I will cherish it for the rest of my life."

"Then why are you doing this Keith?" Nathan sobbed. "Why?"

Nathan's heavy makeup began to wash away as tears continued to flow out of his eyes. He no longer looked like a beautiful woman.

"She will not love you like I do," Nathan wept. "Nobody will love you more than I will."

"I'm sorry Nathan," Keith said. "But there many things you cannot give me. Our relationship was doomed from the start."

"What does she have that I cannot give you?" Nathan yelled.

"She is a real woman Nathan. I don't have to wait for her to turn into a woman so I can be with her at all times. She has real breasts, a vagina and real long hair. We don't need to worry about being discovered and we can do whatever we want in public."

Nathan could not counter that argument. How could he possibly compete with a real woman? This truth only made the pain in his heart grow worse. He sat down on the ground and continued sobbing. That was all he could he do.

"I'm really sorry Nathan," Keith said. "Hurting you is the last thing I would want to do."

Keith sat beside his cousin and hugged him tightly. Nathan continued crying. He cherished his cousin's warm embrace as he knew it might be the last time he would hold him like that.

"Let me take you home Nathan," Keith said. "I don't think you are fit to drive."

Nathan remained silent as he was deep in thought.

"Nathan?"

"Leave me here Keith," Nathan said. "You have chosen your path and now I need to think about mine."

"You will be okay Nathan," Keith said. "I know you will."

"Kiss me one last time my love."

And Keith did. Nathan savored every second kissing his beloved cousin. He wanted the moment to last forever. But the kiss ended and Nathan let Keith walk out of his life.

Nathan waited for Keith to leave before he started crying again. He needed Keith's love. To live without it would be to die a slow and painful death. There was no other option; he had to win him back. But if he was to fight for Keith's love, he would have to do the unthinkable.

"He needs a woman," he thought. "Then I will become one."

Nathan prided himself as a female illusionist. Most illusionists do not take hormones and remain male while living happy lives. But the circumstances required Nathan to make a paradigm shift. Being 18 years old, it was a good (but not optimal) age to begin the transition. He already had a lot of knowledge about the whole process. The transformation into a woman would be a long and painful one. But that did not deter him as he would do anything to win Keith back.

So after a few hours of contemplating his future, Nathan changed his appearance and drove back home to spend the Thanksgiving weekend with his family. He savored this special time with his family as he knew he would not see them for a very long time.

After Thanksgiving, Nathan dropped out of college and moved to a big city. There he began working as a professional female impersonator. Most of the money he earned was used to purchase a cocktail of hormones. His journey towards becoming a woman had begun.

***** Chapter 7 "Farewell Fuck" *****

"Whoa ...," said Tony. "That blew my mind Lana."

Tony reeled from the blowjob he had just received. His body slumped back into the fluffy pillows of Lana's large bed. Nobody was better than Lana. He looked at her divine face as she moved into his loving embrace.

"So tell me more about her," she smiled. "Do you think she is the one?"

"Unless you change your mind," he teased. "I will leave anyone for you anytime."

"Hey don't talk like that!" Lana pressed Tony's nose with her finger. "If you don't love her, don't give her false hopes."

"I was just joking Lana," he chuckled. "She is a teacher from a small town close to where I live. You will like her."

"So is it getting serious?"

"It is Lana," he responded. "I will have to stop seeing you ..."

"So that's why you flew in tonight?" Lana asked. "To say goodbye to me ..."

Tony did not want to say goodbye to Lana. She was the perfect lover and companion. Maybe if he stuck with her a bit longer, she would eventually change her mind and marry him.

But the billionaire just turned 46, he was getting old. Being a pragmatic businessman, he searched and found another ideal woman who was ready for marriage. It was time for him to settle down and have children.

"Some of the happiest moments in my life have been with you Lana," he said. "I will always love you."

"I will miss you Tony." A tear dropped from Lana's eye. "But you are doing the right thing. Love her as if she was the only woman in the world."

Tony smiled as Lana was being very romantic again. Even though he still wanted her for himself, a part of him wished that she would eventually find her soul mate. If anyone deserved to be loved, that would be Lana.

"Lana?" he asked. "Of all your boyfriends, why did you stick with me the longest? I'm not really that hot or good in bed. And I know you don't really care about my money."

"It's what you do after we make love," she responded. "You are the best companion among them."

"So I gather you would like me stay until the morning?"

"Yes Tony," she smiled. "Please do."

And Tony stayed. They made love again and Lana slept within his tight embrace. She woke up to the smell of eggs and bacon from her kitchen. Tony had made her breakfast and they ate with much chatter.

After eating they made love one last time. It was the perfect Farewell Fuck with her favorite boyfriend. Lana would never forget him.

Maritess hugged Lana as she entered her triplex. Seeing her best friend was always the high point of each day.

"You look lovely Maritess," said Lana. "You're glowing."

Lana studied best friend and felt proud. She had taken Maritess under her wing and thought her everything she knew. With encouragement, reassurance and lots of love, Lana had pulled Maritess out of her shell.

Maritess was now more confident, outgoing and cheerful. A bright smile was now a common sight on her lovely face. This happiness created an enchanting glow about her that made her even more attractive.

"Thanks Lana," Maritess smiled. "But you will always be the prettier one."

For Maritess it was more than about being Lana's protege. Lana was the big sister she never had and she fit the role perfectly. Lana was taller, wiser and more beautiful. She was a gift from God during her darkest hour.

"So what do you want to do today Lana?" she asked.

"I don't know," Lana sighed. "I feel lost ..."

"Are you still sad about Tony?"

"No, I don't think it's that," Lana said. "I need to find him, my soul mate. He's out there somewhere Maritess ..."

Her best friend just smiled as there was no real solution to that problem.

"Oh I am being a hopeless romantic again aren't I?" Lana smiled. "Lets just go do something fun together."

"Why don't we go shopping?" Maritess sat on the couch in the large living room while Lana paced back and forth. "That always cheers you up Lana."

"I know, let's go the park!" Lana said. "Would you like to walk in the park with me?"

"Of course Lana," responded her best friend. "I would do anything for you."

"Thanks Maritess," Lana said. "You are the best."

And to the park they went. But there wouldn't be that pleasant stroll that Lana had envisioned. One supermodel might be able to enjoy walking in the park unnoticed. But with two supermodels, you were just asking for trouble. They caused a commotion from the admiring public. Lana and Maritess ended up signing autographs and being photographed with many people.

So they had to leave Lana's sanctuary and go shopping within the premiere retail district. While buying some new heels Lana smiled as she realized that Maritess was right, it did cheer her up.

***** Chapter 8 "Nathan's Journey" *****

"Ladies and gentlemen," a booming voice said. "The lovely Nat ..."

Nathan walked on to the stage as the music began playing. People applauded as they were smitten by his appearance. They saw a beautiful young woman with long blonde hair and they could not believe he was a man. But that was what they wanted to see, it was the best transgender club in the city.

Performing here meant than Nathan was one of the best. All his efforts towards becoming the best woman he could possibly be were now coming to bear fruit. He was now nearly three years into his transition.

He was wearing a black corset with a matching G-string. The garters of the corset stretched as he began his seductive walk. His legs were incased in black fishnets while his feet arched within the matching black four inch stilettos.

So much about him had changed. Even his own mother might have a difficult time recognizing him. His hips were wider and he had a waist that most women would envy. He had real A Cup breasts now and he enhanced his cleavage with some tape and padding. Some of his old female illusionist tricks still found themselves to be useful.

The most dramatic change was his face. Hormones, electrolysis and extensive facials had sculpted his oval face into a thing of beauty. He was very passable and pretty now, that a lot of normal men would ask him out on a date. Nathan would decline all serious suitors of course, both the unsuspecting straight and the eager tranny chaser.

Nathan began lip-synching to Aretha Franklin's Natural Woman song. It was a popular song among transgender performers. With his feminine hands, he pushed his breasts outwards and shook his petite shoulders. The crowd loved seeing his breasts jiggle, they cheered. He giggled as the energy from the crowd brought him to an exhilarated state. It was a symbiotic relationship, and Nathan continued seducing the crowd with his lovely body until the song ended.

"R-E-S-P-E-C-T!" boomed the speakers.

The music changed to Aretha's rendition of the Respect song. This song had a faster pace which would give Nathan a chance to display his dancing skills. He began dancing and gyrating his body to the fast beat of the music. The crowd roared as they saw the young woman do several twirls in her four inch heels and she flung her glorious golden mane with every turn. Without losing her balance, she continued her seductive dance while touching herself. This reminded Nathan of how feminine his body had become and he displayed his happiness to the adoring audience. They were charmed by his sweet smile and many fell in love with him.

"I feel so beautiful." Nathan felt his hidden penis was extremely aroused. "It's great to be wanted."

Nathan approached the edge of the stage to give the crowd a chance to touch what they had fallen in love with. He hated this part of the show, but it was a rule of the club that he had to follow.

"It's okay, they love me," he said to himself. "They won't hurt me."

As he walked around the edges, a large number of admirers began touching him as they tucked money all around his sexy outfit. Some fondled his breasts, while others ran their fingers across his tucked penis. A large man even kissed him on the lips as he slipped a 100 dollar bill in his G-string.

"Oh God, that was like kissing an ashtray," he thought.

But Nathan smiled back and did not show any displeasure towards the men who admired him. He eventually finished his routine and the crowd went wild when he left the stage. They wanted another performance as Nat made all their cocks woody.

"Nat ... Nat ... Nat!!!" They called for an encore. "Nat ... Nat ... Nat!!!"

But they would have to wait another hour before he would come back on stage. Back in the dressing room Nathan sat in a stool while looking at his reflection. He removed his wig to show his own long and thick blond hair. In a few more months he would no longer need a wig.

"Damn I'm tired," he thought. "One more routine..."

Tired was understatement. Nathan was exhausted. Living in the city and transitioning into a woman wasn't cheap so he also had to work at a beauty salon and sometimes moonlight as a transsexual escort. There were days when he would want to give up but he would somehow pull through. A burning desire deep within his heart drove him. His love for Keith kept him going.

This was one such day. He wasn't sure if it was the side effects from the hormones or Keith's upcoming birthday that made him depressed. It was another birthday he would not share with his beloved. His delicate hands clasped a small golden locket that hung from the necklace around his neck. He opened the locket to reveal a small picture of Keith smiling.

"Oh Keith," he whispered. "If you only knew how much I love you."

"Feeling sad again Nat?" said a female voice behind him.

"It's his birthday tomorrow Sarah," he said.

"Don't be sad," she said. "I'm sure you will win him back."

Sarah was his Drag Mother. She taught him how to be one of the best performers of the club and also watched over him as if she was his favorite aunt. Sarah sat beside him and kissed his cheek.

"Ouch ...," Nathan cringed in pain as she kissed a bruise that was covered with thick makeup.

"Oh dear, I'm sorry," she said. "Is that where Max hit you?"

Nathan nodded. He had a client recently who was known for liking rough sex. What his pimp did not know was that Max liked to hit his trannies while he fucked them. It was a dangerous business but there was nothing they could do about it. Going to the police was pointless as they were viewed as the lowest form of prostitutes.

"Why don't I gather all the girls to my place later and let's watch movies all night?"

"I would like that Sarah," Nathan said. "But do you mind waiting a few hours for me? I have to see a client after this show."

"You work too hard Nathan," she smiled. "Don't worry, we will wait for you."

"Sarah, you're up next," yelled the stage manager.

"See you tonight Nathan!" she smiled.

Sarah adjusted her long white nightgown and grabbed her shining microphone as she prepared to enter the stage. Nathan studied his Drag Mother as she began her routine. Sarah was one the best performers in the country. She also had a most feminine beauty that had won her dozens of Transgender Pageants. Many would even argue that she could compete in a real female national pageant. But it was her golden voice that made her the star of the show.

The crowd went to their feet as her enchanting voice echoed throughout the club. Sarah started singing Charlene's famous love song "Never Been to Me" and she nailed every note perfectly. (If you haven't heard this old song, go here to listen to it: http://www.musicaldelites.com/neverbeentome.html)

"I wish I could sing like that," Nathan said. "She is the best."

Experiencing Sarah share her gift from God lifted his spirits. There was something very pure and magical inside Sarah that came out when she sang. It was a shame that mainstream society would not accept people like her. They were missing out on one of the best musical performers alive today.

The crowd went silent as Sarah's golden voice captured their hearts.

"Please lady, please lady, don't just walk away

'Cause I have this need to tell you

Why I'm all alone today

I can see so much of me still living in your eyes

Won't you share a part of a weary heart

That has lived million lies...."

Nathan cried as Sarah's voice touched him. He looked at Keith's picture again and his depression went away. His desire to continue his journey had been rejuvenated.

"Oh, I've been to Niece and the Isle of Greece

While I've sipped champagne on a yacht

I've moved like Harlow in Monte Carlo

And showed 'em what I've got

I've been undressed by kings

And I've seen some things that a woman ain't supposed to see

I've been to paradise, but I've never been to me...."

Sarah saw Nathan smiling with tears as he watched her from the sidelines. She knew he loved this song and that it would uplift him. Seeing her friend happy, she smiled and winked at him.

"Take your wig off sir," said the young police officer.

"It's not a wig," Nathan cried. "This is my hair."

"Oh isn't he a pretty one?" teased the sergeant.

The police officers laughed as they began taking mug shots of what appeared to be a beautiful young blonde. She continued crying as they took her fingerprints and processed her for solicitation.

"Stop crying sissy boy," said the sergeant. "You won't get any sympathy here."

Nathan was terrified, he had been in many frightful situations before but this was his first time to be arrested. That client after the show turned out to be an undercover cop. The new mayor was passionate against prostitution and Nathan was one of the first victims in their overzealous sting operation.

"Don't I get a phone call?" he sobbed.

"In the morning," said the younger officer. "We won't let you off the hook that easily."

The two police officers escorted their new guest towards the jail cells. All the male inmates immediately took notice then started whistling and yelling their admiration towards Nathan.

"That's a fucking man?" one yelled.

"Put him in our cell please!" yelled another.

"We will make you a real woman!" The taunts just kept on coming.

Nathan was shivering in fear as he walked in his high heels. He was wearing a small black dress that showed a generous amount of his feminine body. It was obvious to everyone, he didn't belong here.

"I'm a woman," he cried. "Please put me with the women."

"Women don't have dicks," the sergeant teased. "You belong here faggot!"

The two police officers laughed as they dragged him to the end of the room and placed him in the cell with the least amount of men. The three men inside the cell smiled and they welcomed their new cellmate with open arms.

"Please, I beg you," Nathan cried. "Don't do this!"

"Shut the fuck up faggot!" yelled the sergeant. "This will teach you the meaning of the law!"

Nathan tried his best to distance himself from his three inmates. As the two police officers went out of sight, he felt the three men slowly approach him. Nathan had never been more afraid in his life before.

"Please leave me alone," he begged them. "Please ..."

Nathan was a temptation that was impossible to resist. The three men knew he was a man, but his sexy body and pretty face had made all of them hungry with sexual lust. This was a place where you would find many men who don't exercise restraint.

"Don't resist," said the biggest of them. "Unless you want to get hurt ..."

Nathan tried his best to fight as they ganged up on him. One of them punched his ribs while another twisted his arm tightly around his back. They slammed him against the bars with a force that almost knocked him unconscious. Two men held him while the leader of the pack lifted his skirt from behind and pulled down his panties.

"Officer, help me!" Nathan screamed. "Please help me!"

The three men paused as the sergeant came into view. He walked towards their cell with a smile on his face. Nathan felt doomed as he saw the sergeant began unzipping his pants. The police officer pulled out his penis and began masturbating in front of him.

"Fuck the faggot," said the sergeant. "I got the best view from here."

Nathan yelled at the top of his lungs as the three men took turns raping his ass. Seeing the sergeant masturbating in front of him and hearing all the inmates cheering for the rapists broke Nathan's spirit. He stopped struggling and he started crying again. That was all he could do.

"You are one hot faggot," the sergeant said. He also found it strangely arousing to see the she-male's limp dick swaying back and forth as her ass got pounded.

Help soon arrived. The young police officer had a strong dislike for people like Nathan. But his conscience would not allow the injustice to continue. He called for the lieutenant to intervene. They should have come sooner as Nathan had already been raped by his three inmates by the time they got to him.

They transferred Nathan to a small interrogation room and left him there alone for the night. Nathan huddled towards the corner of the room. He was in shock and severely traumatized.

"Why God?" he asked. "Why?"

Nathan's body shivered and he struggled to regain control of his quivering hands. He was losing his mind. But he remembered something that would give him strength in times like these. He opened the small locket and looked at the picture of Keith's smiling face again. A miraculous calm came upon him. It came from Keith's smile, the smile that always lifted his heart.

He brought himself back to a birthday party at Keith's house many years ago. There was a lot of food and many relatives were there. The house was frenzied with activity and everyone was happy. As Keith began opening his many gifts, Nathan gave him a small card for him to read.

"Meet me at the Hut tonight so I can give you my gift," it read.

The cousins smiled at each other as they could not wait to make love with each other again. These were their happiest moments together.

"I wish I could have that moment back," he thought.

Nathan realized midnight had passed. It was Keith's birthday now. Alone in a dark small room, Nathan sobbed as he remembered the happier life that he had lost.

"Happy Birthday Keith," he cried in the darkness.

***** Chapter 9 "A Romantic Doctor" *****

Lana hated hospitals. Seeing sick and dying people made her sad. She needed to get out. But they had to run more tests and keep her under observation. Why so much attention? It was just a minor concussion.

Maybe it was her agent Gil who had a tendency to be overprotective. She was his biggest money maker so he would not take any chances. He got the best doctor in the city to make sure she would be fine.

"I shouldn't complain though" she thought. "I'm lucky to have so many people who love me."

Her parents and siblings were on their way. Gil booked them on the next best flight. All of her ex-boyfriends visited earlier. The Actor, the Politician, the Billionaire and the Aristocrat -- it was surreal to see them all in one room. Many friends came and left but the best remained with her. Gwen, Char and Maritess were all still here.

"Will you sue him Lana?" Char asked. "I would."

"I don't think so," she said. "It was an accident Char. Life is too short to hate someone for something like this."

"You can be too nice sometimes Lana," Maritess said.

Maritess held Lana's hand as she lovingly played with her sister's long brunette hair. Maritess was wearing a very short yellow dress that showed off her long legs and high heels. Lana started eying her best friend's legs and Maritess noticed.

"Don't say it," Maritess smiled. "I know -- You hate your legs."

Lana giggled and observed that Gwen was unusually subdued. Gwen also hated hospitals and it took a lot of effort for her to come here.

"What will you do with all these bloody flowers?" Gwen asked. "And still they keep on coming."

"I don't know Gwen," Lana replied. "Maybe we should send some to the other rooms? They probably need it more that I do."

A tall and handsome doctor entered the room. He had a comforting smile and a reserved demeanor. Lana started imagining herself dancing with him in a grand ballroom. As the music stopped, the handsome doctor leaned into her body and kissed her.

"That works for me," she thought and then giggled. "We have a match!"

But it would be hard to make any moves on the good doctor with all her friends around her. They looked so darned prettier in all their designer dresses while she wore a dull and uninspiring hospital gown.

"Hey girls," she said. "You don't have to stay you know. I'll be fine."

Lana tried to use her eyes to send a hidden message. She would make eye contact with her friends and then train her eyes on the handsome doctor.

"Leave me with the doctor," she thought. "Oh please get my message."

Char picked up Lana's message. She almost laughed upon reading her mind.

"Oh that's Lana," she thought. "When she's bored she gets romantic."

"Girls," Char said. "I think we need to buy Lana some presents to cheer her up."

"Oh that's a great idea Char," Maritess said. "What do you want Lana?"

"Definitely shoes," Gwen smiled.

"Surprise me ...," Lana grinned.

Lana's friends kissed her goodbye and she finally had some alone time with the good doctor. His name was Jonathan Stiller and he came from a wealthy family up north. Lana liked him instantly and she tried her best to make him love her. She used her princess face on him and she shifted her body so that he would always look at her best angle. As they talked, she tried her best to sound enthusiastic, sweet and intelligent. Lana was an expert at flirting.

But the doctor did not bite.

"Oh dear," she frowned. "Either this guy is the ultimate professional or he is gay."

Doctor Stiller began his physical examination.

"Definitely gay," she thought. "No man has touched me in those parts and remained that calm, even doctors."

Lana sighed.

"What's wrong Lana?" the doctor asked. "Are you feeling depressed?"

"Not really," she frowned.

"What's on your mind then?" he asked. "I'm your doctor, I can help."

"I would rather not say Doc," Lana smiled. "I would hate to sound pretentious."

Doctor Stiller enjoyed talking to his patient. He was a big fan of Svetlana Rodin and he wanted to keep the conversation going. She seemed to have a very likeable personality.

"There is nobody else in the room Lana," he smiled. "Whatever it is, you can tell me as I am bound by doctor-patient confidentiality."

"Okay, don't say I didn't warn you Doc," she grinned. "Are you gay?"

The doctor made a nervous laugh.

"Since I am not attracted to you, then you assume I am gay?" he smiled. "That's pretentious all right."

"But are you?" Lana smiled. "I'm usually right about these things."

"I don't like men and I don't like women" he said.

"I don't get it Doc." Lana looked puzzled. "Are you a eunuch?"

The doctor laughed again. "No Lana, I am a tranny chaser -- I like ultra feminine transsexuals and nothing else."

"Oh my," Lana cringed in embarrassment. "I didn't see that coming."

She sank her head on a big pillow to hide. "Sorry Doc, my mistake."

"Don't worry about it Lana, no offense taken."

Lana brought her head back up and smiled. This doctor was a very good catch and she would not give him up so easily.

"Doc, can't you just pretend I was a transsexual?" she smiled. "Just imagine I used to be a man and I will act like one. Will you like me then?"

"That wont work Lana," he chuckled. "Besides, I only like pre-ops. Unless you have a dick, it just won't work for me."

"Oh dear," she sighed. "I just can't win."

Lana sank her head on the pillow again and started banging on it. Game over.

"I'm sorry Lana," he said. "You are the most beautiful woman I have met, but I just have a very specific need."

Lana lifted her head up again.

"So let's say you find your perfect t-girl Doc," she smiled. "What would you do with her?"

"I will romance and love her as a real woman. When I am done with her, even she would believe she was a real woman."

"That's very romantic Doc." Lana eyed him with disbelief. "Are you for real?"

"I'm dead serious Lana. Don't ask why people like me love trannies, we don't know -- we just do."

"This guy is perfect for Maritess," she thought. "I wonder if she will like him."

Lana smirked.

"I have proposal for you Doc."

The doctor looked at Lana suspiciously. "Okay, let's hear it Lana."

"If you discharge me from this hospital right away, I will introduce you to the most beautiful pre-op transsexual in the world," she smiled.

"You are being pretentious again Lana," he laughed. "I have met some of the best pre-ops and unless you know them all, wouldn't it be too bold to make that statement?"

"Trust me Doc," said Lana. "She is numero uno -- God I wish I had her legs. But whether she likes you or not, is entirely up to you ..."

"Sounds tempting Lana, but I need to do a follow-up examination on you tomorrow."

"Do it at my place Doc," she grinned. "I'll make sure she will be there."

***** Chapter 10 "Turning Point" *****

Nathan locked himself in isolation after his harrowing experience at the police station. Constant fear and paranoia prevented him from functioning normally. As a victim of that horrible act, he probably suffered some psychological damage. But he decided against seeing a psychiatrist. Nathan was careful with his money and he had stopped working for the past two weeks.

But he was never alone. Many of his friends visited him to offer their support. It was Sarah who helped him recover the most. She would come everyday and sing to him. When Nathan was not in the mood for songs, Sarah would remind him of all good stories he had told her about Keith.

On the third week, Nathan finally recovered. He was curled up in his small bed while looking constantly at a large picture of Keith on his nightstand. It was here that his overwhelming desire came back. His love for Keith was just too strong to give up.

He got up from his bed and started making a few phone calls. The club eagerly booked him for the next week as he was one of their major draws. The beauty salon also missed him as his regulars frequently asked about him. But the transsexual escort service will have to wait. It would take a long time for him to recover from that tragedy.

Nathan looked at the reflection of the pretty blonde woman on the shiny elevator doors. She smiled back as she continued fixing her long blonde hair.

"Not bad," he thought. "Be beautiful -- that's why they pay you."

He tugged on his pink dress and turned his body to admire his figure. "Excellent." The young woman moved her long legs together and twisted them from left to right to admire its reflection.

"Jeff loves my legs," he thought. "Well ... they all do."

The elevator doors opened and Nathan stepped out. His wide hips swayed as he walked towards the penthouse suite. His heart started beating faster as he reached his destination and prepared to knock on the door.

"Relax," he thought. "Jeff is a decent man."

Jeff had been one of his regulars since he started working as a tranny call girl. He was one of Nathan's favorites. He always treated him like a woman and he always paid well. It was also Jeff who encouraged Nathan to come back into this shady profession. When he stopped being a tranny call girl several months ago, Jeff offered to pay triple the regular amount for the chance to see his favorite pre-op tranny again.

The offer was just too good to refuse, Nathan accepted. Soon his other regulars paid the same rate for a chance to make love with the fabulous Nat again. The money poured in and Nat could make a strong second income just by seeing all her regulars.

"Tap ... tap ... tap ..."

Jeff opened the door and smiled at his favorite tranny. Nat always got prettier every month and she now looked like a woman you would proudly introduce to your parents. She was stunning and she always dressed like a classy woman. If you would meet her under different circumstances, you would have no clue that she was a man.

"Hello beautiful," said Jeff. "You look lovely tonight ... as always."

"Thank you Jeff," she blushed. "I always try my best to please you."

Jeff handed her a long stemmed rose. Nat giggled as she accepted his gift and kissed him. He embraced her soft body and enjoyed the sensation of her tongue exploring his mouth. His erect penis begged him to fuck her now.

"Not yet," he thought. "The night is young."

He pulled away from Nat.

"Is there something wrong honey?" she asked.

"I have you for the entire night," he smiled. "Let's take it slow shall we?"

Jeff took Nat's hand and led her inside the huge penthouse. Many rooms could be seen on either side and there was a cozy sunken living room at the center.

"Nice place," she smiled. "You didn't have to ..."

"But I want to Nat," he said. "Every moment with you is special."

Jeff held her hand as they walked towards an open balcony. There was an elegant table waiting for them. Two chairs, a food tray, many flowers, and two lit candles. But it was the spectacular view of the city skyline that took Nat's breath away. The bright lights of the tall buildings lit up like giant lanterns in the night.

"Oh my," she said. "It's so beautiful up here."

Nat placed her hand over her mouth as she giggled again. Her hidden penis got woody and she could not hide the happiness on her face. Being treated like a woman made her feel that way and Jeff was very good at it.

"But not nearly as beautiful as you," smiled Jeff.

Jeff pulled a chair and carefully moved it forward as Nat sat. He poured her some expensive champagne and served her the first course of their meal before taking his seat.

"Why are you so nice to me Jeff?" she asked.

"You have my heart Nat," he smiled. "And I want yours."

Nat blushed and looked down as she smiled. Jeff reached across the table and held her elegant hand.

"I love you Nat," he said. "Let me take you away from this awful place. I want you to live without worries. You will never have to work again."

"You know my heart is taken Jeff," she looked at him. "I can only give you my body."

"But will you let me try?" he asked. "I want you to love me."

"Well I don't really have a choice do I?" she smiled. "You just won't give up."

"Exactly," he smiled. "So can I have you for the entire weekend next week?"

Nat paused for a moment. She thought about the amount of money she could earn from Jeff's proposal. But she had an appointment that could not be cancelled.

"I would love to Jeff but I have an important engagement at that time."

"Oh really now?" he said. "I'm jealous -- will you let me outbid him?"

"It's not that Jeff," she laughed. "I have a facelift and breast augmentation scheduled for next Friday."

"Oh my God," Jeff gasped. "Please tell me more ..."

"I will have C cup breasts, more feminine eyes, fuller lips, nicer cheeks, and a new nose." Nat's eyes sparkled as she felt excited about being even more beautiful.

Jeff scrambled for his scheduler and checked his calendar.

"I can't wait to see you after that!"

He flipped through the pages and decided he could cancel everything for Nat.

"So can I see you two weeks from now?"

"You will have to wait longer for all the scars to heal Jeff," she smiled.

"Okay tell me when!" He picked up a pen and prepared to re-arrange his life around Nat. "I will even see you on a weekday -- I don't care!"

"Don't worry Jeff," she laughed. "I will call you once I am ready. You will be the first client to see the new and prettier Nat."

"You promise?"

"Of course Jeff," she smiled. "It's the least I could do for my favorite client."

Jeff raised the champagne glass for a toast.

"To a more beautiful Nat," he smiled. "God have mercy on our broken hearts."

"I'll toast to that," Nat laughed.

"God damn it!" said Doctor Winston. "What a poor soul!"

Seeing another victim troubled the doctor deeply. So many vulnerable and innocent people victimized by greedy and incompetent doctors. He studied the patient again as they rushed him to the operating room. Infection, internal bleeding, damaged nerves, and possible chemical poisoning. The prognosis looked grim.

"This is what happens when dermatologists try to become surgeons!" he yelled to a younger doctor next to him.

"How can people be so ignorant?" asked Doctor Mills.

"That is why we need government regulation," he responded. "So they won't get deceived by these unscrupulous bastards!"

"He is convulsing," said Doctor Mills. "This doesn't look good."

"Concentrate Mills!" responded the senior surgeon. "We can save him!"

The two doctors tried their best to save the life of another victim of medical negligence. More patients like these would arrive every week. But cosmetic surgery was unregulated and there was not much they could do about it. They would have to continue fighting in the front lines until the lawmakers decide to take action.

After several hours, Doctor Winston walked towards the waiting room. A pretty tall blonde woman waited nervously for him. He knew what he would tell her would break her heart but that did not bother him. Twenty years working as a doctor can teach you how to shut down your emotions.

"Are you family?" he asked.

"I am Nathan's closest friend," she said. "My name is Sarah."

"You might need to call his family" he said.

"Will Nathan make it Doctor?" she began crying again.

"We have done all we can," he said. "Nathan is now in the ICU and I give him a slim chance of making it through the night."

Sarah was devastated, she fainted. The doctor caught her and helped her back into a chair. She loved Nathan very much, as if he was family. But Nathan did not give her any information about his real family. How would she get in touch with them?

"Keith," she thought. "I must call Keith."

Nathan did make her promise one thing to him. If he would ever die, she would call the telephone number at the back of the large picture on his nightstand.

"Keith would do the right thing," she recalled Nathan saying. "I know he will."

"Doctor," she sobbed. "Can I see Nathan?"

"If he stabilizes," said the doctor.

"I need to get in touch with his cousin," she said. "Please call me if anything happens."

"I will make sure you will be the first to know."

Sarah rushed back to Nathan's apartment and acquired Keith's number. If this was Nathan's dying wish, then she would make sure that it would happen. But Nathan would make through the night and live. His strong heart would not give up so easily.

And Keith arrived several days later. The cousins would face each other again...

***** Chapter 11 "Sundays at Gwen's" *****

Gwen and her husband lived in a huge mansion a few miles from the city. It was here every Sunday where the supermodels would play poker. No Limit Texas Holdem was their game and it could get down right vicious. But even if you didn't like to gamble, you would come here for the company.

"Three of a kind, the pot is mine," smiled Gwen. "You're out of chips Lana."

"I'm terrible at this game" said Lana. She dropped her head on the table as she was out of chips. Ten thousand dollars gone, her friends took them all.

"Would you like to buy some more chips Lana?" asked Gwen. "It's only four in the afternoon."

Lana started banging her head softly on the table.

"Imagine how many shoes I could have bought with that money," Lana said.

"Oh please Lana," Char said. "I know how much you make ..."

"Well okay," she smiled. "Give me five thousand more Gwen."

Lana wrote another check and gave it to Gwen in exchange for more chips.

"Go easy on me girls or I may have to find myself a new billionaire boyfriend," she joked.

As they continued playing, a heavily tattooed man wearing nothing but shorts walked by them and stopped. He recognized everyone except for a new beauty. Her lovely face and flawless legs immediately caught his attention. He approached, took her small hand and kissed it.

"Well who do we have here!" he said.

"Nigel, would you put something on!" Gwen said. "Maritess meet my husband Nigel, Nigel -- Maritess."

"Is this him?" he asked. "Absolutely gorgeous, I am in love."

"Hello," Maritess smiled. "I love your music."

"C'mon lets have a hug" he said.

As Maritess moved closer to hug him, Nigel pulled her body and kissed her on the lips. Her eyes popped wide open as she was surprised by the behavior of Gwen's husband. After a few seconds he released her and stepped back.

"Well ladies, excuse me for I need to cleanse these impure thoughts."

Maritess was perplexed as all her friends started laughing.

"Don't worry," Lana laughed. "He did that to me too."

"He is shorter than I thought," Maritess crossed her arms.

"He's not short, we are tall," Char smiled. "We are models."

Maritess was star struck. Nigel was one of her favorite singers.

"Gwen, could you let him sing my favorite song?" she asked.

"Not now," she smiled. "Once you get him started, he won't stop."

"Please, please, please?"

"Why don't you come when the whole band is here," Gwen said as she dealt a new hand. "They can get really crazy and its fun to watch sometimes."

"Thanks Gwen."

"So how was your date with the handsome doctor Maritess?" Char asked.

Maritess took a deep breath and prepared her romantic story. She felt her tucked penis getting aroused as she started thinking about the good doctor.

"So he brings me to his family's house and introduces me to them," she smiled. "After dinner, he takes me to his mother's greenhouse and blindfolds me. With my eyes closed, he lets me smell the most fragrant flowers you could imagine. Then he asks me what I liked the most. And when he takes the blindfold off, I see that he has made me a bouquet of my choice."

"Smooth fella," Gwen grinned.

"Icky ... too mushy for me," Char cringed.

"Oh my God," Lana said. "That's so romantic!"

Lana dropped her head on the table and began banging it softly again.

"It's not fair," she said. "I saw him first but he doesn't like me!"

"Please don't feel bad Lana," Maritess said. "Would you like to meet his brother?"

"Well I don't know ...," she said. "Is he as romantic?"

"Still looking for your soul mate are you Lana?" Char laughed. "Why don't you go meditate with Nigel?"

"How can that possibly help me?" Lana frowned. "Are you joking?"

"Nigel claims that's how he found me," Gwen laughed. "If you ask me, I think its all rubbish. Makes for a great pickup line though ..."

"I'm not that desperate Char," Lana smiled. "Maybe I will check out the good doctor's older brother."

***** Chapter 12 "True Love" *****

"Go away Keith!" Nathan yelled. "I can't let you see me like this!"

Nathan closed his eyes, turned away from his beloved and started sobbing. He had spent the last three years trying to become beautiful for Keith but now he was hideous. To make things worse, most of the damage to his face and chest was irreversible. With bleeding, infection, cut nerves and bad stitching, Nathan looked like a casualty of war.

The dream was shattered and his nightmare had begun.

"Get the fuck out of here Keith!" Nathan continued sobbing and started screaming in agony. "Please Keith ... leave me alone!"

But Keith stayed and he also broke in tears. He could not even recognize his beloved cousin anymore. Aside from the badly damaged face, Nathan's arms, hands and legs look incredibly feminine. There was no trace of Nathan except for the higher pitched voice that still sounded somewhat familiar.

Keith moved closer to the hospital bed and held Nathan's hand. Seeing his cousin's destroyed face up close broke his heart. He buried his head into Nathan's shoulder and emotionally broke down.

"Why Nathan?" he sobbed. "Why?"

"I just wanted to be your perfect woman Keith ...," Nathan sobbed. "So you could love me."

That revelation crushed Keith's heart. Nathan had never given up on his love for him. He had thrown away his bright future to win him back and now it ended up in disaster. His cousin had done it all for him.

"You did this for me?"

Keith's cries grew louder as a tremendous guilt began to torture his soul. He felt a raging hatred for himself. This was all because of him.

"Oh Nathan," he cried. "This is my fault. I should have never left you!"

Pain consumed him. He felt his heart dying while his head seared with anger. There was no question that he still loved Nathan very much.

"Nathan, let me make things right," he sobbed. "Let me take you home and take care of you. I love you Nathan."

"It's too late Keith," Nathan cried. "How can I love you if I cannot even love myself anymore ..."

"Don't give up Nathan! We can do this together!"

But Nathan had already given up. He was tired of the world pushing him around. Why did he have to suffer so much? It seemed that God was punishing him for being a disobedient child.

"Keith if you still love me ...," Nathan coughed as his tears were drowning him. "Do me one last favor."

"What is it Nathan?" Keith asked. "I will do anything!"

"Give me something to kill myself with ..."

"No Nathan! Please don't say that!"

"I am a horse with four broken legs Keith. Put me down, you of all people should understand."

"Even if you are right Nathan," Keith said. "You cannot take your own life -- you will go to Hell!"

Nathan looked at Keith to give him a full view of his damaged face. He also lifted his clothing to show his damaged chest.

"I already am in Hell Keith!" Nathan started sobbing again.

Seeing this caused Keith to break down again. He embraced his beloved cousin as they both continued crying. The pain, anger and guilt were driving him crazy. Then he realized that Nathan was probably infinitely more tormented that he was. Should he help Nathan take his own life? The answer came to him quickly. It was a conversation they had many years ago while gazing at the stars in one of those perfect summer nights.

"If I get paralyzed from the neck down," he said. "Don't let me live."

"Are you sure about that Keith?" Nathan asked.

"Yes Nathan," he said. "That would not be living."

"I understand Keith," Nathan said. "I want you to do the same thing if something like that happened to me."

Keith kissed Nathan on the forehead and looked into his eyes. He already had several things in mind to get the job done. Being a third year Vet Med student and working in his father's stables had given him the knowledge. It would have to balance a quick death with the least amount of pain.

"I'll be back," Keith whispered. "I'll do it Nathan, just like we promised each other under stars many years ago."

And Nathan counted down the final hours of his life. Sarah visited him in the afternoon and sang to him again. Whenever she would visit Nathan, she would look at him as if it was the last time she would see him. She knew it was only a matter of time before Nathan would take his own life. But she did not talk about it. She understood his plight and she would probably do the same thing.

Keith arrived many hours later. He brought two syringes that lay hidden underneath his jacket. Acquiring what he needed didn't take long. He spent more time walking at a nearby park contemplating about what was about to happen.

"The first one will ease the pain," Keith said. "The second one will put you down."

Keith rolled up Nathan's sleeve and highlighted an ideal vein with a blue marker. He gave his cousin the two syringes with his hands shaking.

"Inject there ..."

Nathan inhaled deeply and summoned the will to end his life. It wasn't difficult. He was ready to die.

"I love you Keith," Nathan said. "I never loved anyone more."

Keith embraced his cousin and they began crying again.

"I love you Nathan."

"Go Keith, go," Nathan sobbed. "I don't want you to get in trouble for this ..."

Keith found it difficult to leave and remained embracing his cousin.

"Please Keith, go ..."

Keith stood up and faced his cousin. Both of them were still sobbing and they wiped their tears to get one last good look at each other. When Keith finally left the room, Nathan made a short prayer.

"Almighty Father, I know for what I am about to do will lead to damnation. I have done nothing but Love someone with all my heart. But I no longer have the strength to continue this horrible life you have given me and if you punish me for giving up, then thy will be done. Please have mercy on me."

Tears continued to gush out of Keith's eyes as he walked down the hallway. As he continued thinking about what was about to happen, the memories of his best moments with Nathan flashed right before him.

Keith had shared so many experiences with him growing up. Nathan was not only his cousin; he was his lover, his brother, and his best friend. Then he realized that he loved Nathan more than any other person. And Nathan probably loved him even more than that. That was the great tragedy. Nathan had to ruin his life to make him see that.

This realization sent Keith running back to Nathan's room. If he loved Nathan more than anyone, then there was one last thing he should do.

"You came back Keith," Nathan said. "Please go."

Keith took the syringes from Nathan's hand.

"You have done nothing but Love me Nathan," Keith cried. "You do not deserve to go to Hell."

Nathan started sobbing again.

"I love you more than anyone Nathan," he wept. "I know that now and that is why I will be the one who will end your life."

"No Keith!" Nathan sobbed. "No!"

"So that you will go to Heaven -- and I will go to Hell," Keith cried.

Keith stabbed the first syringe into the marked vein. Nathan tried to prevent him from stabbing the second syringe, but Keith easily overpowered him. The second syringe came next and they both knew that it would end soon.

"I love you Nathan," Keith sobbed.

Keith kissed Nathan on the lips. He wanted his cousin's last moments to be filled with love. And that's what Nathan got. Nathan wrapped his weak arms around Keith's neck and they continued to kiss as his body began shutting down.

"I love you Kei ..."

Nathan saw his life flash before him but the loving presence of Keith's kiss made him face death without fear. Love was the last thing he felt. Then his life slipped away.

"Go to the light Nathan," Keith sobbed. "You belong in Heaven."

Keith should have left as the medical instruments started sounding their alarms. People would be coming soon. But he stayed with Nathan as he would not let his beloved die alone.

The medical staff surged into the room and they saw Keith sobbing while still embracing the lifeless body of his cousin. They tried to separate him so they could revive the patient but he would not allow it. Security had to be called in to forcefully remove him. But that was okay, Keith felt sure that Nathan was in Heaven by that time.

***** Chapter 13 "Keith's Hell" *****

Keith walked into his cell with slumped shoulders. It was dark, cold and depressing. There could not have been a more terrible punishment for someone who loved riding horses in the open plains than to be locked up in a very small room. He looked at his cellmate and the old man pointed to an empty bunk.

"He seems to be the quiet type," he thought. "That's good. I don't want to talk about anything anyway."

He lay down on his bunk, faced the wall and began weeping without uttering a sound. It didn't bother him that he would be in prison for a very long time. What bothered him was what he had done to Nathan. He betrayed Nathan's love and that drove his cousin to ruin his life. For that, Keith would never forgive himself.

"And that bitch I left Nathan for" he thought. "She broke up with me even before the trial started ..."

He would also be haunted by the endless possibilities of what he could have done differently. It would be Thanksgiving soon and they could be making love in that small hut again. Then they would watch the moon and the stars as they lay together in that cozy thick blanket. Why was he so stupid? They would have remained happy lovers for the rest of their lives if he had only made the right decisions.

"Oh Nathan," he thought. "I hope you are at peace in Heaven."

And Keith would have a lot of time to think about all these things. Even though most people agreed it was assisted suicide, the district attorney had an agenda so he would not agree to manslaughter but instead asked for 2nd degree murder.

The case was tried and Keith was convicted of all charges as predicted. He was sentenced to 12 years in prison. The first few years were terrible and it almost drove him insane. Keith was beaten on countless occasions, stabbed three times, and gang raped once. But he took the worst they could throw at him and they finally left him alone.

They called him "the loner" since he did not make any friends. He liked spending most of the time daydreaming about his best times with Nathan. Even though his cousin was dead, the memories of that perfect summer kept him going. It was ironic, but the love he betrayed would be the love that would give him strength during his darkest days.

Keith would get out in 7 years for being an excellent inmate. All of the time wasn't wasted. His father encouraged him to continue studying behind bars -- which he did. After prison, he would go on with his life striving to breed championship horses. But love and happiness would elude him. He would often think that his heart had died with Nathan during that fateful moment in the hospital many years ago.

***** Chapter 14 "A very sad Story" *****

Lana howled in agony. Her pretty face twisted in pain as tears continued to flow down her cheeks. It was a most unusual sight for the young woman who was always cheerful; whose bright smile would bring light to any dark day. Seeing her in this condition was heart breaking to her close friends.

"Calm down Lana," Char said. "Tell us what's wrong."

Char sat beside Lana and held her hand while stroking her long hair to try and calm her down. On Lana's other side was Gwen who held her other hand as she began wiping the tears from her face. Gwen began crying as she could not bear witnessing her good friend in such a poor state.

"Lana, please talk to us," Gwen cried.

Lana was inconsolable and she continued her wails of sorrow. Her best friend Maritess was saddened most among the three. She wanted desperately to help her best friend but she did not know what to do. Frustrated and deeply hurt, she broke down and sobbed on Lana's lap.

"Lana, please stop crying," she sobbed. "Please stop crying."

Gwen gazed at her husband who was observing them as he remained sitting on the floor. She had seen enough, she lunged at him and began choking him.

"What the hell did you do Nigel?" she yelled.

Gwen realized she should not have let Lana leave the table when she lost all her chips again. Her good friend got bored and decided to talk to Nigel.

"She just wanted to find her soul mate Gwen! So we meditated and this was not supposed to happen!"

This was the first time Nigel had seen something like this occur. Even he had some misgivings about his beliefs. But what happened now had cleared all his doubts.

"So how can knowing your soul mate make you that depressed? Is her soul mate Pee-Wee fucking Herman?" Gwen asked.

"No Gwen," he said. "His name is Keith!"

"Is he some really ugly fella?"

"It's not that Gwen," Nigel said. "After meditating, Lana remembered ..."

"Remembered what?"

"Lana remembered," he repeated.

Nathan remembered. There never was a Lana, it was him all along -- he just did not know it. But now that he did, his previous life began to torment him. He remembered the most sad and painful moments in great detail as if it had happened only yesterday.

"Why?" he asked himself. "Why did I have to suffer so much?"

But the answer came to him before he even finished his question.

"Lessons," he thought. "Very important lessons ..."

And it all made sense. After being a victim of so much hate, prejudice and despair in his previous life, learning these lessons made him a better and stronger person in this one. That was why he could not get himself to hate or discriminate against anyone despite his high social standing. Now he knew why he was full of love and people loved him back with abundance.

As Svetlana he was strong, because as Nathan he was weak.

"Hey Lana is smiling," Char smiled. "I think she will be okay."

"Lana, please talk to us," Maritess said.

Nathan looked at Maritess and his smile even grew brighter.

"So that is why I love her so much," he thought. "She reminded me of myself."

Nathan started discovering other things from his previous life that helped him greatly in this one. Being a former drag queen gave him the skills to be the ultimate model. This gave him the ability to move his body with unmatched grace and femininity no matter what clothes he wore. Then there were his amazing hair and makeup skills, his passion for female fashion, the unexplainable gift for dancing, and the matching memories kept on going.

"I'm so blessed to have you as my friends," Nathan cried. "I'll be okay ..."

"Share your pain with us Lana," Gwen said. "We are here for you."

"Are you sure Gwen?" Nathan asked. "It's a very sad story."

"Please tell us Lana," Maritess said. "I would really like to hear it."

"Sad huh?" Char grinned. "Let's hear it."

Nathan's closest friends, in this current life, huddled around him as he began sharing the tragedy of his previous life. Everyone cried, even Char, as it was the most depressing story they had ever heard.

"Now I understand why you couldn't commit yourself to any of those great guys," Gwen sobbed. "You still love him!"

"What he did for you in the hospital," Char cried. "That's the most romantic thing I have ever heard."

"When did this happen?" Maritess asked. "Lana, he could be still alive!"

"Oh my," Nathan said. "He should be 45 years old by now!"

Realizing that Keith was still alive brought back a tremendous desire within him. Nathan felt compelled to reunite with Keith.

"I must see him!" he said. "You are right Gwen. My mind has forgotten, but my heart has not."

Nathan stood up and felt his small feet arched in his five hundred dollar 4 inch heels. The sensation of his silk thong covering his pussy and the crack of his ass came next. Then he sensed his famous breasts supported by a matching silk brassiere. And finally his elegant couture dress that was a gift from his favorite designer.

"Oh shit," he thought.

Nathan knew he had been female for the past 23 years, he remembered growing up as a girl so it should not have been a big deal. But the needs and frustrations of his previous life got the better of him and he began to feel a tremendous joy inside him. The sensations of the female clothes he wore started to sexually stimulate him. His pussy began tingling while the nipples of his breasts became hard.

"This is going to be weird," he thought.

Nathan touched his breasts and started laughing. He felt as if he had died and gone to transvestite heaven. Feeling his desire to become a beautiful woman in the past only made him appreciate his current body even more. Nathan felt like the happiest woman in the world.

But he still hated his legs.

***** Chapter 15 "Tortured Soul" *****

At a large stable in the middle of nowhere, two middle-aged men watched from a distance as a fifteen year old girl patted and talked to a huge brown horse.

"What a magnificent horse," Peter said. "It's a shame he did not take the Triple Crown."

"Two out of three is a great accomplishment," Keith responded. "He is a champion."

"I agree, but your stud fee is quite high," Peter said. "However, my daughter says I should do it."

"What is she doing anyway?" Keith asked.

"She is talking to the horse," Peter answered.

"Is that so? I haven't seen a genuine Whisperer in ages."

"She was born with that gift. Anna has been doing it around my stables ever since she was a little girl," Peter smiled. "Go talk to her, she will surprise you. You might learn something about your horses that you never knew."

Keith walked to the teenager and studied her. She was pretty and her long blonde hair was tied with a big white ribbon. Anna looked like one those teenagers who would rather spend most of her time shopping at the mall.

"What is he telling you?" Keith asked.

"He still wants to race," she said. "Once his leg heals you should race him. He wants to race."

"I don't think so," he responded. "We risk permanent harm. I would rather have him enjoy the rest of his life running free across my land."

"Race him," she said. "Racing makes him happy."

"Okay," Keith smiled. "Let me think about it Anna."

Anna turned around and looked into Keith's eyes. She saw a very sad man who was full of guilt and pain. Never had she seen such a tortured soul in her life. This made her feel bad and she wanted to help him.

"They say you killed a man Mister Keith," she said. "Did you hate him?"

Keith was taken aback by her very direct question. Many people had asked him this question before but he never answered. There was no point. Nathan ruined his life because of him. That was why he sent Nathan to heaven while he deserved to go to hell. But there was something about this girl that made him want to talk about it. Anna had a calm and healing presence.

"I killed him because I loved him," he said.

"If you loved him, then why did you kill him?" she asked.

"Because he wanted to die ..."

"Why did he want to die?"

"Because he loved me ..."

Anna frowned as Keith spoke in riddles. Thinking about what he said just confused her. She stretched out her hand and placed it over the man's heart. Anna felt him and she understood.

"So is that why you live alone Mister Keith?"

"Yes," he said. "I don't deserve to be loved and nobody else will love me like him."

"You hate yourself," she said. "You need to forgive yourself Mister Keith."

"What's the point Anna?"

"You can't ask forgiveness from a dead man Mister Keith," she said. "Forgive yourself and the pain will go away ..."

"Anna!" yelled her father. "Let's go!"

Anna said goodbye to the huge horse and held Keith's hand.

"Forgive," she whispered.

"Damn," he thought. "This girl is the real deal."

Keith had many sleepless nights thinking about what Anna told him. He knew she was right and the solution sounded simple. But try as he may, he still could not forgive himself for what he had done to Nathan.

***** Chapter 16 "The Transvestite Supermodel" *****

Gwen was speechless. She greeted and hugged Lana at the door as it was another Sunday gathering at her mansion. Her good friend looked very different today. Lana's long brunette hair was elaborately styled as if she was going to her own wedding. Her lovely face was painted to perfection as were her long nails.

"I feel so lesbian right now," Gwen thought, admiring Lana's beauty.

What took her breath away was the dress that Lana was wearing. She wore an elegant black dress that showed a generous amount of her famous breasts and flawless long legs. Even though she came here to be among the company of friends, Lana was dressed for a red carpet event.

Lana greeted and hugged her other friends. They were also flabbergasted by her stunning appearance. Her friends remained silent and stared at her as she took her place at the poker table. But she quickly noticed their unusual behavior.

"What is it?" Nathan asked. "Is there something wrong?"

"Aren't you a little overdressed Lana?" Char asked.

"Oh, I'm sorry girls but I can't resist my transvestite urges," Nathan said. "I have an overwhelming desire to always look my best."

And Svetlana Rodin looked her best indeed. She looked so darned beautiful that her friends were starting to feel attracted to her.

"With a body like yours and your legendary wardrobe collection, I guess that makes you the luckiest transvestite in the world Lana!" Gwen joked.

All her friends laughed but Lana remained silent.

"It's not funny Gwen," Nathan frowned. "I am constantly aroused wearing these amazing clothes and I got hundreds more. God knows how many times I pleasured myself this week."

Nathan dropped his head on the table and started banging on it softly.

"I need help," he said. "I belong in an asylum ..."

"Don't feel so bad Lana," Maritess said. "This will make you a better model. Photos of me touching myself shine because I really do enjoy touching myself."

"Maritess has a point Lana," Char smiled. "Mitch tells me that you were glowing this week. His latest photo shoot with you was the best he had so far."

"And you make me feel like a lesbian Lana," Gwen laughed. "Talk about crossover appeal."

"It's just so weird," Nathan said. "I can't get enough out of myself."

"Don't worry Lana, it will pass," Maritess said. "When I got these breasts, I could not help but play with myself for a long time."

"I know what's wrong," Gwen smiled. "Lana isn't overdressed -- we are underdressed!"

Gwen led her friends upstairs to the huge master bedroom. The three supermodels started trying on some of Gwen's finest dresses while Lana did their hair and makeup. After two hours, the four supermodels went back down to sit at the card table. All of them were dolled up and dressed to kill -- for poker.

"Thanks girls," Nathan smiled. "You have brought me so much joy in this life."

Nathan's friends smiled back as they felt good cheering him up. He had done so many things for them in the past to earn such love and loyalty.

"So did you get his number Lana?" Gwen asked.

"Gil made some calls and found out his parents are still alive. He also learned that Keith lives alone and he never got married."

"He still loves you Lana!" Char started crying. "That's so romantic!"

"Call him Lana," Gwen said. "Call him!"

Nathan knew that wouldn't be right. After all he and Keith had gone through, their next meeting should be in person.

"We deserve more than a phone call," Nathan said. "I must come to him."

"Would you like me to come with you Lana?" Maritess asked.

"Thanks Maritess but I must go alone," Nathan smiled. "Once we meet again, we will have a lot of catching up to do ..."

A private jet landed in a small airstrip in the middle of nowhere. As it came to a halt, the door opened and the crew prepared the stairway. Svetlana Rodin, the only passenger, made her way down the steps with care as not to trip in her red high heels. Returning to her old hometown brought a bright smile to her face. She inhaled the fresh country air and closed her eyes as it brought back many pleasant memories.

"When would you like us back Miss Rodin?" asked the pilot.

"If all goes well Captain," she smiled. "Not for a very long time."

"We will have your bags ready in a few minutes Ma'am."

"Oh my," thought Nathan. "It's great to be back here."

Nathan smiled as Tony's people transferred his entire luggage from the private jet to a car already waiting for them. Tony was more than eager to help Lana re-unite with her soul mate. He was true friend, among many.

"Would like me to accompany you Miss Rodin?" one of the crew members asked. "I have been here before."

"Thanks Karl," she winked. "But so have I."

It did not take long for Nathan to drive towards his old hometown. So much yet so little had changed since he had last been here. His heart started pounding as he drove past Keith's old home. Keith's parents still lived there but Keith had built his own house and stables farther down the road.

After following a long and winding road, a large hippodrome came into view. Next to it was a modern structure designed to house and breed horses. Seeing this reminded Nathan on how much he also loved horses.

"I wonder if Keith had bred his champion."

Nathan took a sharp turn and saw a long ranch style home at the end of all the structures. His heart was now beating out of control with anticipation. This was it; he had arrived at Keith's house.

"Oh God," he thought. "Why do I feel so nervous?"

Nathan got out of the car and closed the door with his trembling hands. He almost lost his balance as he walked in his three inch heels. It had been so long since Nathan felt this nervous. His entire life as Lana had filled him with infinite confidence.

"I've posed naked in front of people for crying out loud," he said. "Relax and show confidence."

But as Nathan got to the doorstep, he froze as he could not find the strength to knock or ring the doorbell. His knees started to feel weak while his stomach began to twist in knots. He leaned his back on the wall next to the door and inhaled deeply to try and calm his nerves. What would he tell Keith?

"Hi Keith, it's me Nathan. I have been reincarnated as Svetlana Rodin."

The simple truth can sometimes be the hardest thing to believe.

"Hi Keith, it's me Nathan. I have come back from the dead and I have possessed Svetlana Rodin."

That would be too creepy ...

"Hi Keith, it's me Nathan. I have found this alien box and transformed myself into your perfect woman."

Too much sci-fi ...

"Hi Keith, it's me Nathan. Before I died in that hospital, a magic ring trapped my soul. And now that Svetlana Rodin wears this ring, I control her body."

Too much magic ...

"Hi Keith, it's me Nathan -- wearing a Svetlana Rodin bodysuit!"

Too kinky ...

"Congratulations Keith! You have just won the ultimate publisher's clearinghouse sweepstakes jackpot. The famous supermodel Svetlana Rodin is now yours and she will love you with all her heart."

Too commercialized ...

What would he tell him? Nathan stood there trying to find the courage to face Keith. But he wouldn't have much time as he heard footsteps approaching the door.

"Okay, ready or not Keith," he thought. "Here I come."

Nathan moved back to the door and prepared to face Keith. It opened to reveal a tall muscular man wearing a long sleeved shirt, jeans and riding boots. The sleeves of his shirt were folded up to reveal his muscular hairy arms and strong weathered hands. His blonde hair was cut short and his face was now manlier but still very handsome. Keith had aged well and was in excellent physical shape.

"Good evening Ma'am," Keith smiled.

"Oh my God," Nathan thought. "That smile ..."

It was that smile. That smile that always lifted his heart had now frozen him in his tracks. Nathan tried to speak but he could not move his mouth.

"Oh my, what will I do now?"

***** Chapter 17 "A One-Sided Reunion" *****

Keith was also frozen in his tracks as he recognized the woman who had come to his door. It was the famous supermodel Svetlana Rodin. She was more beautiful in person than what he had seen in magazines or television. There wasn't much makeup applied on her divine face but she still looked perfect. Masses of curls from her long brunette hair dangled around the sides of her face while the main mass of her mane flowed down to her back. She looked like a princess from his favorite fairytale.

"Wow," he thought. "Svetlana looks amazing."

Svetlana was wearing a red mini-dress that left much of her magnificent body uncovered. Keith could not help but steal a glance at her seductive cleavage as he stepped back to welcome her into his home.

She made a nervous smile and took a few steps inside. Keith eyed her long flawless legs in motion as she walked with regal elegance.

"Svetlana has the best legs," he thought. "And her body, that's perfection."

"How can I help you Ma'am?" he asked.

Svetlana did not answer. She stood there staring at him with her hands slightly shaking. There was so much she wanted to say but she was still trying to regain her composure after the shock of seeing her beloved.

"Hi, my name is Keith." Keith offered a handshake.

But he got more than that in return. Svetlana took a few steps forward and embraced him. Her perfume smelled sophisticated and he instantly got aroused.

"What the hell?" he thought. "Maybe she needs a hug."

Keith wrapped his arms around her soft and slender body. He was even more puzzled as Svetlana started crying. She hugged him even tighter and he felt her tears washing down to his neck.

"What's wrong?" he asked. "Do you need help?"

He tried to pull away to make eye contact with her but she would not release her tight embrace. Svetlana continued sobbing as Keith tried his best to understand what was going on.

"Are you lost?" he asked. "Did someone hurt you?"

Finally she answered.

"I love you Keith," Svetlana cried. "I love you so much!"

Keith started laughing and freed himself from her tight embrace.

"Okay I get it. Am I on Candid Camera?" he smiled. "Or am I being Punk'd?"

Keith stretched his head out the door to try and find the camera crew.

"Very funny guys!" he yelled out. "You got me!"

Svetlana pulled Keith back inside and slammed the door.

"It's just you and me Keith," she said. "This is not a joke."

Keith did not believe her. How could he? A celebrity he barely knew just popped up at his doorstep and declared her love for him. He had every reason to be suspicious.

"You are Svetlana right?" he asked.

"Yes," she said. "But ..."

"Svetlana Rodin?" he interrupted her.

"Yes," she said again. "But ..."

"The supermodel?" he interrupted her again.

"Yes Keith, but ..."

"I'm sorry Svetlana, but I don't think we have met before. So I don't get it." Keith cut her off one more time.

"Would you let me finish!" she yelled.

"Okay, calm down Svetlana."

"It's me Keith," she said. "I am Nathan."

Keith laughed again.

"I have been reborn but I have not forgotten you," she cried. "When you kissed me as my life slipped away in that hospital bed -- your love stayed with me even after I died."

Keith stepped back as a chill spread across his body. How could she possibly know that? He never told anyone about his last moments with Nathan.

"Okay," he said. "This isn't funny anymore."

"I am wearing a red dress Keith," she said. "Do you remember what I wore when we first kissed? When I sucked your cock? When we fell in love?"

"Who sent you?" Keith retreated until his back was to a wall. "Did Joshua put you up to this?"

Svetlana stepped closer to Keith and placed her hand on his face.

"Do you remember what I gave you on your eighteenth birthday?"

Svetlana was starting to open very painful wounds that Keith had been trying to forget for decades. She was reminding him of the best times he had with Nathan -- these were also the most painful to remember.

"Please don't do this," he started crying. "You are killing me."

"Ask me anything Keith," she said. "Ask me anything that only Nathan would know."

Keith sat on the floor and started sobbing. A flood of the most painful memories came back and it was killing him.

"I have come back to you Keith," she said. "Please believe me."

"No!" he yelled. "Nathan is dead. I sent him to heaven and for that I will face judgment."

Svetlana kneeled down to him and held his hand.

"I am Nathan," she said. "I have come back to you because I love you."

But Keith was raised as a Catholic and what Svetlana was telling him was impossible to digest. It was sacrilege.

"Get away from me!" he yelled. "Get out of my house!"

"No Keith," she said. "I love you and I am here to stay."

Keith stood up and grabbed Svetlana's arm.

"Get out!"

"Keith, you are hurting me!"

Keith dragged Svetlana towards the door.

"No!" she cried. "I'm not leaving you Keith!"

Svetlana knelt down and hugged both of Keith's legs with all the strength she could muster. The large man lost his balance then dropped to the floor. She got on top of him and started pounding her fists on his chest.

"You left me for an unfaithful bitch," she yelled. "I won't let you leave me again!"

That was the most painful thing Svetlana could have said. She reminded him of his betrayal for Nathan's love. This broke his spirit and he crawled away from her. Keith sat on his couch and started sobbing again.

"Please stop," he said. "The pain is too much. I have spent many nights thinking about ending my life -- do you want me to end it now?"

Nathan stopped. He never wanted to hurt Keith; he only wanted them to be together again. Seeing his beloved cousin in agony broke his heart. What should he do now? The truth was too difficult for Keith to digest. The solution came to him -- he would have to be patient.

"I'm sorry Keith," Nathan said. "Hurting you is the last thing I would want to do."

Nathan sat beside Keith and held his hand until he stopped crying.

"Can we start over?" asked the supermodel.

Keith looked at Svetlana, confused.

"Svetlana Rodin," she smiled and offered a handshake.

Keith smiled and shook her hand.

"So why are you here Svetlana?" he asked.

"Ask me that some other time Keith." Svetlana ran her hand across her long brunette hair. "I am here and I want you -- that's all that matters."

"Why would Svetlana Rodin take interest in a horse breeder?" he frowned. "I don't think you even like horses."

"Don't think why Keith," she smiled. "Just accept it -- I want you."

"I don't believe you," he said. "It's too good to be true."

Svetlana Rodin smirked. The supermodel stood before Keith and started removing the spaghetti straps of her red mini-dress. Keith's jaw dropped as she revealed her bare breasts to him. Her famous breasts were a sight to behold. They were perfectly shaped and proportional to her slender frame.

She pushed her dress down to her wide hips. Keith gazed at her slim waist that most women could only dream of having. The dress dropped to her feet. Keith clenched his fists upon seeing Svetlana wearing nothing but high heels and a red silk thong. She shifted her body to let him see her best angle. The moment seemed like a dream.

"Take me Keith," Nathan thought. "I want you."

Nathan stared at Keith unsure on what to do next. As Lana, he never had to seduce a man -- a simple flirt was usually enough to get them snared. So Nathan had to recall his memories as a tranny call girl. His cousin wouldn't stand a chance.

"I hope Keith hasn't gone gay since we last met," Nathan thought. "That would be the most terrible irony."

Keith wanted Svetlana but he denied himself this gratification. He didn't feel deserving. The many years of self hate had destroyed his self esteem. He started to sweat as he found the strength to resist the ultimate temptation before him.

But Svetlana wanted Keith and nothing would stop her from having him. She keeled before him, took his large hands and pressed them on her breasts. Keith did not resist, of course, and his hands started shaking upon touching her feminine assets.

"Oh God," Keith thought. "It feels even better than it looks."

Svetlana moved her arms around Keith's neck and kissed him. She giggled as he kissed back. "I got you Keith," Nathan thought. "You're mine."

Keith surrendered to his lust. He squeezed the supermodel's perfect breasts and she moaned while her body quivered. His hands started wandering around her body. He stroked her long mane while his other hand grabbed her sexy ass.

"Fuck me Keith," she whispered as they continued kissing. "Fuck me."

Keith moved his arms around her legs and lifted her light body with little effort. Svetlana never stopped kissing him as he carried her to his bedroom and lay her down gently on his bed.

"Are you sure you about this?" he asked her.

Svetlana removed her red thong and tossed it at him. That was her answer. This gave Keith an amazing adrenaline rush. He was about to fuck the famous Svetlana Rodin -- it was a dream come true.

"Don't be shy," she smiled. "Smell it."

And Keith did. He pressed her thong onto his nose and inhaled her fragrance. Her intoxicating scent was like an addictive drug, he was hooked. He gazed at the famous supermodel again. She spread her thighs to reveal her glorious pussy. That female hole that millions of men around the world could only dream about entering -- was now his for the taking. Keith would have the honor of going where very few had gone before.

"Don't keep me waiting," she smiled. "I have been waiting an eternity for this moment."

Keith removed his shirt to reveal a very muscular chest. There were three very prominent scars, stab marks from his time at prison. His pants and his shorts came off to reveal a huge and very erect penis.

"Poor Keith," Nathan thought. "I need to ask him about those scars someday."

Nathan giggled as Keith's warm body came on top of him. His cousin's large frame dwarfed his slender female body. They kissed again and Keith's aggressive hands started squeezing many areas of his soft body. Nathan's hand reached down to feel his beloved's massive cock.

"Oh my," he giggled. "How much you have grown."

Nathan could not wait to feel Keith inside him.

"Fuck me Keith," Nathan moaned. "Please ..."

And Keith did. Nathan's body shuddered as Keith's huge penis entered his vagina. He gave out a trembling moan as he was unprepared for the large size of Keith's invading flesh. Despite having many lovers as a supermodel, this was the largest penis to have entered his vagina.

"Are you okay Svetlana?" Keith asked. "Why are crying?"

"I have missed you so much Keith," she sobbed. "You don't understand how much this means to me."

"Okay ... so are we good?"

"We are most excellent," she smiled. "Don't mind my tears -- I'm happy."

Nathan's body started shaking uncontrollably as Keith continued humping him. The sensation of his cousin's enormous dick inside his vagina sent waves of erotic delight throughout his body. Nathan placed his quivering hands on Keith's cheeks as he savored the moment.

Keith watched as the supermodel climaxed. Her body stiffened and her voice trembled. She tilted her head back but tried her best not to break eye contact. Svetlana looked incredibly seductive as her face filled with ecstasy. Her full red lips reached out for him and he pressed his head down to kiss her. Keith could tell from the way her body vibrated that she was being consumed with physical pleasure.

"One female orgasm down," Nathan thought. "I wonder how many Keith can give me."

Nathan wanted a new sexual position. He embraced Keith and they rolled their bodies sideways without dislodging his beloved's cock from within his vagina. Nathan was on top now and his glorious mane draped all over Keith's face, blocking his vision.

Keith combed Svetlana's long hair with his hand to reveal her lovely face smiling down at him. Being on top, the initiative was hers -- she would have to do most of the work. She began thrusting her lower body forwards, backwards, sideways, and then in a circular motion -- and then repeat the cycle. This created tremendous erotic sensations for Keith as Svetlana continued constricting, twisting, and bending his erect penis in almost every possible way. Keith found himself doing an uncharacteristic moan from the heavenly pleasure he was receiving.

"You like?" she grinned. "I knew you would."

"Damn you are good," Keith gasped.

"Buckle up," she winked.

Keith grabbed Svetlana's breasts as she continued twisting and bending his hard dick in random directions with an even quicker pace. He found himself moaning like a girl again and he squeezed her breasts in appreciation for her great skill. She loved that and moaned her approval as her sharp long fingernails dug into his muscular chest. Keith started to worry as he knew he would not be able to hold back orgasm much longer.

"Are you on the pill?" he asked. "Should I come outside you?"

"Don't you dare pull that dick out ...," she whispered, with a trembling voice.

And they both came. The lovers embraced each other tightly as the built-up sexual energy exploded from their groins and spread across their systems. Their bodies tensed and shook wildly as they moaned together like a sensual duet. Svetlana relentlessly continued twisting and bending Keith's dick until it emptied its load and then finally deflated.

Nathan collapsed on Keith after his second female orgasm subsided. Two female orgasms, not bad -- but Keith was probably rusty. His beloved hadn't been with a woman for many years now and it showed. But that was okay, Keith made love to him and that's all what really mattered.

"I guess I will have to coach him on how to please a woman," Nathan thought. "Not a problem. I have all the time in the world ..."

Keith felt like he had gone to heaven and fucked an Angel. Making love to Svetlana was beyond words, it had to be experienced. She flung her brunette mane backwards and made eye contact with him again. But a long strand remained hanging across the center of her lovely face. With his finger, Keith moved the long strand away to get an unobstructed view of her beauty.

"I hope you don't have an early day tomorrow," she smiled. "We have a very busy night ahead." She winked at him and pressed his nose playfully with her finger.

Keith was astonished. He still could not believe what had just happened. Svetlana kissed him again and smiled.

"So my darling," she giggled. "Do you want me as I want you?"

Keith nodded -- Yes.

"Why Svetlana?" He traced her fine eyebrows with his fingers and admired her bewitching eyes. "Why me, of all people?"

"Because I love you Keith," she said. "Because I am Nathan ..."

***** Chapter 18 "One of Svetlana's Biggest Fans" *****

"Now do you believe me?" she asked.

Keith was speechless. He had just received the best blowjob of his life. After years of receiving blowjobs from hookers and former girlfriends, nobody was better than Nathan -- until now. Svetlana had taken the crown. Was she really that good? Or was it because she was one of the most beautiful women in the face of the earth?

"I don't know Svetlana ..."

"C'mon Keith, isn't that just the best damn blowjob you have ever had?" she asked. "Only Nathan can be that good!"

"Well Svetlana ...," Keith said. "That was better than Nathan, you are amazing!"

Nathan wanted to pull his hair out and he let out a deep sigh of frustration.

"That's because I am Nathan damn it!" he cursed. "Can't you fucking see that?"

"To be honest Svetlana, I don't see the correlation."

Keith was amused as Svetlana began banging her head on his chest. He didn't get it. Why does she have this obsession of being Nathan? Keith stopped her tantrums and looked her in the eye.

"Are you really in there Nathan?"

She nodded -- Yes. But he was not convinced. Svetlana Rodin could not possibly be Nathan. And he did not believe in that reincarnation shit anyway. Maybe she was just eccentric, a lot of famous people are.

"Hey if it makes you happy, I will call you Nathan."

"Call me that only if you believe I am Nathan," she frowned.

Nathan started thinking of what else he could do to convince Keith. Recollecting memories, the love making and the blowjob did not work. Maybe he should just give up and let Keith love him as Lana. There was really no difference as Lana had always been Nathan anyway.

Nathan's attention was diverted to the night stand beside them. On top lay a Playboy magazine in which he was the cover girl. He remembered when he did that assignment, it was a year ago.

He took the Playboy magazine and flipped through its pages. As he reached Svetlana Rodin section, he looked at his pictures. He smiled as he remembered how much fun he had with that shoot.

"God, I hate my legs," he thought.

Nathan flipped to the centerfold, his most glorious shot of the pictorial. The centerfold picture was a masterpiece but there was a lot dirt and residue on this page. He smelled the paper and picked up the unmistakable scent of dried semen. It seems that Keith had masturbated on his picture.

"Keith, you naughty boy!" teased the supermodel.

"Oh man this is embarrassing!" Keith said. "Please stop ..."

Keith covered his face with a pillow. His favorite supermodel had discovered his secret fantasy -- he frequently made love to pictures of Svetlana Rodin. It was the most embarrassing moment in his life.

"You masturbated to my pictures?" she asked.

"Yeah ... guilty as charged."

"Aw, that's so sweet ...," she blushed.

Nathan was flattered that Keith loved his image that much. He was also amazed that even when they were apart, Keith still somehow loved him. Was this destiny in motion again? It was profound, but Nathan was not in a thinking mood tonight.

He pulled the pillow from Keith's face and handed him the Playboy magazine. Nathan had studied and recalled all his poses for each page and he was ready to give his beloved cousin an exclusive show.

"Okay, focus," Nathan thought. "This is very important, this is for Keith."

Keith looked puzzled as Svetlana dropped her naked body to the bed. She turned her body sideways and fixed her long brunette hair. As she twisted her body, her hands started covering her breasts and her pussy. Svetlana Rodin looked irresistible.

"What are you doing?" Keith asked.

"It's the first picture," she said. "Tell me when you are ready for the next one."

Keith looked at the first picture in the Svetlana Rodin section and then compared it to the woman before him. It was as if the magazine had come to life. She had nailed the exact pose and seductive look. God she was beautiful.

"Wow," he said. "Okay, next page Svetlana."

As Keith went through the pages, Svetlana Rodin recaptured every single page in perfect detail. But that was expected, she was one of the best (if not the best) in this profession. After finally reaching the last page, Keith dove into her and started kissing her like a wild man. She did not mind of course, she loved him more than he could possibly understand.

Keith wanted to fuck her again but decided to wait. He was having so much fun getting to know his favorite supermodel. She was sweet, funny, energetic and maybe a little crazy. There was also something about her that lifted his spirits. Her presence made him very happy.

"I got more magazines," he said.

"Oh really now?" she grinned. "Why am I not surprised?"

Keith opened the drawer of the nightstand and pulled out a dozen other magazines. He had more stashed somewhere else but this should be okay now. As he gave them to Svetlana, she smiled as it brought back many good memories. The Sports Illustrated Swimsuit Pictorial was her particular favorite.

"I wish I brought some swimsuits with me," she said.

Nathan was surprised as Keith gave him a pen. None of his former boyfriends asked him for an autograph before. It was awkward.

"Oh God, that's it," he thought. "He is going to love me as Lana. Well, I guess as long as I am with him -- that will be fine."

"While you are here, do you mind signing them?" Keith asked.

"Keith! Lovers don't ask for autographs," she said. "What use do you have for them anyway? You already have ... Me."

"When you leave, I will have something to remember you by."

"I love you Keith," she said. "Like it or not, I am here to stay."

There she goes again. Was this really happening? His favorite supermodel, someone he barely knew, was madly in love with him.

"Can I love her?" he thought. "I already do!"

It was a no-brainer. Only a fool would reject a woman this perfect.

"Can you drop that Nathan thing?" he asked. "Can I love you as Svetlana?"

Nathan's heart sank. But if that was what Keith wanted, that's what he would give him. He would do anything to make his beloved happy.

"Fine Keith," she said. "And call me Lana."

"I love you Lana," Keith smiled.

Nathan threw the pen away and began kissing Keith passionately. He pushed his cousin down to the bed and they rolled around as they wrestled. The lovers laughed as they began tickling and kissing each another.

"Keith stop!" Nathan laughed.

Keith looked deep into Lana's eyes as his body rolled on top of her. She smiled back and her eyes sparkled with joy. He was not sure why, but his dead heart had come back to life. He was in love. It had been so long since he had felt this way.

"LyublyU tebyA vsem sErtsem, vsEy dushOyu" Lana said.

"Pardon me?"

"My other parents taught me how to speak Russian," she smiled. "I sometimes speak Russian when I make love. A lot of my ex-boyfriends think it's hot. Did you like that my love?"

"That was amazing Lana, what did that mean?"

"I love you with all my heart, with all my soul," she smiled. "I've never told anyone that in English or Russian."

Keith started blushing. Lana noticed, and she kissed him.

"Sweet Jesus, Lana is too good to be true," he thought. "She is even better than my wildest dreams."

"Okay let's try it," she smiled. "Fuck me and I will speak Russian."

"Alright Lana, here we go ..."

Keith inserted his penis into Lana's vagina. Her body vibrated and she greeted this sensation with a giggle and a big smile. She placed her petite arms around his neck and kissed him.

As Keith started pumping her, Lana rubbed her famous breasts on his muscular chest. They both loved that. She then bent her neck backwards and inhaled deeply.

"Ya znal, chto naydU tebyA" she said.

(I knew I found you)

"Damn, that sounded hot," he said.

"Ne magU zhIt' bes tebyA Keith" she said.

(I can't live without you Keith)

"That was even better Lana!"

Keith pumped her faster and harder. Her embrace around his neck got tighter and her voice started to tremble. Lana was being overwhelmed with erotic pleasure.

"Ti nuzhnA mne Keith, Ti nuzhnA mne" she moaned.

(I need you Keith, I need you)

"I have fallen for you Lana," he said. "I love you with all my heart."

"Ya tebyA lyublyU Keith" she moaned. "Ya tebyA lyublyU ..."

(I love you Keith, I love you)

Their bodies stiffened and they came at the same time. As they embraced each other tightly, their bodies trembled with ecstasy. When it was over they relaxed their embrace and started gasping for air. Keith had another awesome fuck with his favorite supermodel. It was even better than the last time. Lana was right, it felt like fucking an exotic foreign woman and it was a very erotic experience.

"I'm speechless Lana," he said. "That was so hot!"

"I'm happy that you're happy," she smiled.

Nathan felt like the happiest woman in the world. Keith was the best lover he ever had without question. It wasn't because Keith was an expert in love making but it was because Nathan loved him more than anyone.

"My darling Keith," Lana smiled. "I promise to love you unconditionally and make you the happiest man in the world!"

Keith wondered if someone he just met could make a promise like that. But deep inside his heart, there was something that made him believe in what Lana was saying. She is the one -- He had found his soul mate.

"I already am Lana," he smiled and kissed her again. "You made me believe in love again."

***** Chapter 19 "Convincing Keith" *****

Keith opened his eyes to see the famous supermodel Svetlana Rodin smiling at him. She was still wrapped in his tight embrace. The large nipples of her breasts were hard, she was very aroused.

"You are still here," he said. "It wasn't a dream!"

"I dreamt about you," Nathan smiled. "We were making love inside an old blue barn."

Keith felt his stomach turn. There she goes again. Lana was opening more memories about Nathan. He decided to ignore what she said.

"How long have you been staring at me?" he asked.

"Maybe about two hours ..."

"Why didn't you wake me?"

"You look so handsome when you are asleep." Nathan placed his dainty hand on Keith's cheek. "I don't mind waiting for you my love."

"Would you like some breakfast Lana?"

"Can you make me your cheesy grits and bacon?"

"Well I'll be damned," thought Keith. "There she goes again. Nathan's favorite breakfast ..."

"Okay, cheesy grits and bacon for the woman I love!" he said.

As Keith prepared breakfast, Nathan put on the shirt that his beloved had worn last night. It was oversized for his slender female body that it hung like a bad dress. But it still had Keith's scent and he felt connected to him by wearing his shirt.

Nathan combed his long mane, washed his face and brushed his teeth using Keith's toothbrush. Satisfied with his appearance, Nathan walked around the living room studying how his beloved had lived. He even got curious and checked Keith's mail. The famous lingerie catalogue that he had worked on was there.

"Lana," Keith yelled. "Breakfast is almost ready."

"Yes dear! I'm coming!"

Nathan picked up the newspaper and a lingerie catalogue and brought it to the breakfast table. He read the paper and finished the crossword puzzle within a few minutes.

"Here you go," Keith said. "It's hot, be careful."

Keith placed several plates before Lana and poured her some orange juice.

"Thanks love," she smiled. "It's been awhile since I had these."

Keith watched as his famous lover began eating and was enchanted by her beauty. She did not have any makeup and he thought Lana even looked prettier that way. Her long wavy brunette hair was combed elegantly to drop all the way to her back and he thought about running his fingers across it -- maybe later.

She was also wearing the shirt he had on last night. The erect nipples of her breasts protruded strongly against the shirt's fabric. Seeing this reminded him on how great a lover she was.

"Oh my," Nathan said. "Now that's cheesy grits!"

"Lana, do you always eat food like this?" Keith asked.

"I shouldn't be," Nathan smiled. "But I just had to taste your grits."

Keith picked up the paper and flipped to the crossword section. It was his habit to do it while he ate breakfast. But he dropped his fork upon seeing that it had already been completed. To fill all those boxes up in such a short span of time required skill.

"Did you do this Lana?" he asked.

Nathan smiled and nodded. Keith was too scared to continue that discussion so he dropped the topic and continued to eat.

"Oh Keith," Nathan thought. "Cant you feel that it's me?"

Nathan frowned and crossed his long legs. As he waited for his beloved to finish his meal, he flipped through the lingerie catalogue to pass the time. He had seen it many times before but the images were so good that he never tired from revisiting it.

"God, I hate my legs," Nathan whispered.

Keith raised his eyebrows. He moved his chair closer to Lana and rested her long legs onto his lap. She tilted her head backwards and giggled as he ran his hands across her flawless legs. Lana loved it when men did that.

"Are you kidding Lana?" Keith smiled. "You have the best legs."

Nathan sighed, moved his chair next to his beloved, and crossed his legs again. He selected a page to prove his and point and showed it to Keith. It was the famous picture of Maritess having her hands all over his breasts while he groped her sexy ass. The hot lesbian lovers pose was undoubtedly the best picture in the catalogue.

"Now look at this my love," Nathan said. "Compare my legs to hers. Now she has good legs. I wish I had those legs."

Keith almost choked upon seeing the incredible picture. Lana and that new model looked incredibly seductive that his cock instantly inflated. He could not wait to make love with his new girlfriend again.

"Lana, I disagree" he replied. "Your legs are definitely better than hers."

"Of course you will say that Keith," Nathan sighed. "You are my lover, which makes you biased."

"Even before you came into my life Lana," he chuckled. "I always thought your legs were the best. But that new model is really hot though."

Nathan quickly closed the catalogue as he suddenly felt insecure.

"Yes she is Keith," said the supermodel. "Should I be worried?"

"I can't believe this. The famous Svetlana Rodin feels threatened and insecure? Are you serious Lana?"

"I don't want to lose you again Keith. Should I be worried?"

Keith embraced Lana and kissed her. This seemed to give her comfort and it eased her insecurities. It did not take long for him to see that bright smile on her lovely face again.

"Don't be silly. You are the one I love Lana."

Nathan started making soft and loving kisses all over his beloved's face. Keith responded by squeezing his breasts which made him start giggling as his body shivered.

"That is why I need to convince him I am Nathan," he thought. "Once he realizes I am Nathan, he will love nobody else but me."

Keith suddenly lost his appetite as Lana continued showering him with loving kisses. A different hunger started to take hold -- a sexual hunger for Lana.

"Lana?"

"Yes my love?" she whispered.

"Can we make love after do I do the dishes? I won't take long, I promise."

Lana stopped kissing him and then she made a rare frown. What he said was very unromantic and it also seemed to irritate her.

"Did I say something to offend you Lana? If I did, I'm sorry ...," Keith said.

"I'm your fucking woman Keith so you don't need to ask for permission. Just take me whenever you want and I will be ready. Run your fingers across my hair or just kiss me and suck my tongue. Grab my breasts, my ass, or whatever pleases you," she sighed. "If you want to fuck me, just fuck me!"

Keith realized his stupid behavior. It probably hadn't sunk in yet that Lana had truly given herself to him. But now she was spelling it to him clearly -- Svetlana Rodin will do anything for you. He got the message, loud and clear. With one strong sweep of his muscular arm, he cleared the dishes in front of him causing some of them to drop on the floor.

"Lana," he smiled. "I will take you now."

Nathan was surprised as Keith lifted him like a feather and gently laid his sexy ass on the breakfast table. He placed his dainty hand over his mouth and started giggling as he saw his beloved pull down his shorts to reveal a familiar huge and erect penis.

"Now that's what I'm talking about," Nathan thought.

Nathan lifted the long shirt he was wearing and spread out his thighs. He displayed his glorious pussy to Keith again with confidence.

"Take your prize my prince," Nathan cooed. "I surrender myself to you."

"Don't worry Lana," Keith grinned. "I will."

Keith inserted his massive cock into Lana's pussy and began satisfying his sexual hunger. His girlfriend wrapped her arms around his neck as they kissed like horny teenagers. This only added fuel to his already raging lust for her. He pumped her harder and her slender body trembled as she started making feminine whimpers.

"You are so beautiful Lana ...," he said.

"I know," she giggled. "I'm a real woman now Keith."

"There she goes again," Keith thought. "Who knew Svetlana was so eccentric?"

Nathan felt Keith's hands go underneath his borrowed shirt and begin fondling his breasts. His petite shoulders folded inwards as he savored the tickling and erotic sensations coming from his chest.

"Oh Keith ...," Nathan moaned.

Keith felt Lana wrap her long legs around his lower back. She used her legs to pull his body into her with every thrust. This caused his dick to push even deeper into her vagina and it intensified the physical pleasures they shared.

The lovers continued fucking on the breakfast table causing more plates to fall on the floor and break. Nathan pulled Keith's head and mashed it into his famous breasts as he began experiencing multiple female orgasms.

"Oh God," Nathan thought. "The pleasures of being a woman ..."

On Nathan's third female orgasm, Keith finally came and embraced his girlfriend tightly during his ejaculation. Their bodies rocked together to the same sensual beat that was devouring them. But all good things come to an end and their tense bodies began to relax.

"You are the best Keith," Nathan said, trying to catch his breath. "The best ..."

Lana dropped her body backwards on the breakfast table. She placed her hands on her breasts and started laughing. A warm glow surrounded Lana's happy face and her eyes sparkled. Seeing her like this only made Keith fall in love with her again.

"I want more Lana," Keith grinned. "I just can't get enough of you."

Nathan laughed louder as Keith lifted him up again and carried him towards the bedroom. He could not stop giggling and he showered Keith with loving kisses once more.

"You can fuck me all day Keith," Nathan giggled. "All fucking day ..."

"So that's your champion? He looks magnificent Keith."

"Yes Lana," Keith said. "He won the Kentucky Derby and the Preakness Stakes. But not Belmont ..."

"Will you let me ride your champion Keith?" Nathan asked. "You promised me you would!"

"Yikes," Keith thought. "There she goes again."

He looked at Lana. Her eyes were focused on his prized thoroughbred, admiring its beauty. Should he let her? Well if Svetlana Rodin came all the way out here to be his lover then that was the least he could do for her.

"When his leg heals Lana, sure ... I will let you."

"What's his name Keith?"

"Ultimate Sacrifice ..."

"Oh Keith, that's so romantic!"

Keith laughed as he realized Lana probably knew exactly what he had in mind when he named that magnificent horse. But wait, was he starting to believe that Lana is Nathan?

"Impossible," he thought. "I read the Bible and to even consider that reincarnation crap is blasphemous."

He led Lana to a pair of horses that his people had saddled up earlier. She looked like an elegant princess again with her intricate hairstyle and fine makeup on her royal face. Wrapped around her tall and slim body was a divine green dress. He told her earlier that pants would be more appropriate for riding but Lana never wore pants unless her job required her to. Lifting her up into the saddle wasn't a problem, what worried him was her ability to ride horses. She said she rode when she was little, but his heart told him that she was lying.

"Are you sure you can ride Lana?" he asked.

"Don't worry my love." Nathan winked at him. "It's been awhile but I think it will come back to me."

"Lana," he said. "Let's just go slow alright."

Keith got up on his saddle and they were on their way. He kept a careful eye on Lana and was surprised at how she handled her steed like a seasoned veteran. She seemed to know exactly what she was doing.

"I remember Keith, I remember!" Nathan smiled. "I can ride!"

"Okay Lana," he said. "Follow me!"

Nathan saw Keith gallop away from him. Instinct kicked in and he whipped and motioned the horse to give chase. An adrenaline rush came over him as the powerful body of his horse thundered below. The wind blew strongly against his face as they sped up and caught up with Keith and his mount.

"Oh my," Nathan whispered. "I forgot how beautiful it is out here."

Nathan gazed into infinite wide open plains before him. Finally he understood why he hated the big city -- he felt trapped there. Now he could ride at full speed in any direction. Out here he was free.

"Freedom," he thought.

The horse went even faster and then he stretched his arms to feel the strong wind against his body. A flood of memories returned to him on how much he enjoyed being out here. He smiled and tilted his head backwards to enjoy his newly found freedom.

"I'm free!!!" he yelled. "I'm free!!!"

Keith was surprised to see Lana zoom and pass by him at full speed. She looked elated as she continued yelling at the top of her lungs. Her long brunette hair flowed like a royal flag in the wind. But it was her outstretched arms that caught his attention.

"What the hell?" he thought. "Does she want to get herself killed?"

He whipped his mount to give chase and stop her reckless behavior.

"Lana, slow down!" he yelled. "Slow down!"

"I'm free!!!" she yelled. "I'm free!!!"

As Keith finally caught up with Lana, he took hold of her horse's reins and they began to slow down until they came to a halt. What he did was a very dangerous maneuver that it could have gotten both of them seriously injured.

"Nathan you nitwit!" he yelled. "Why do you keep on doing that shit?"

Nathan could not believe what he just heard. He rested his arms and looked at Keith in disbelief.

"You called me Nathan," he said. "Do you believe me now Keith?"

Keith shook his head and looked down.

"No Lana, No!" he said. "You just reminded me of Nathan! He liked doing stuff like that."

"Very well Keith," Nathan said. "Follow me ..."

Lana galloped away again. She headed towards a familiar small hut next to a stream. Once there, she dismounted, tied her horse and entered the small structure.

"Oh God, No!" Keith thought. "How can she possibly know about that?"

***** Chapter 20 "Forgiveness and Love" *****

From the window inside the small hut, Nathan looked at the sunset on the wide open plains. He remembered how much he loved seeing the sunset from here, it was spectacular.

"So much beauty," he said. "In this place ..."

As Keith entered the hut, Lana sensed his presence from behind. She placed her hands around her dress and lifted it up to reveal her panties on her sexy ass.

"Oh God," Keith whispered.

Deja vu. A chill flowed throughout Keith's body.

"Fuck me Keith," Lana said.

Keith ran his hands across her long legs making her body stiffen while she giggled. He embraced her from behind and started kissing the back of her neck. His right hand moved over her breasts while his left hand squeezed and tickled her hip. She tilted her head back and reached backwards to run her hands on his short blond hair.

"Oh Keith ...," she moaned.

Keith pulled down her panties and entered her vagina from behind. Her body shuddered as the sensation of his huge penis inside her always drove her mad with lust. But Lana had something else in mind this time. She pulled away and looked into his eyes.

"No not there," she said. "Fuck me in the ass."

"In the ass?" he asked. "Are you sure Lana?"

"Don't worry Keith," she winked. "I've done it before."

Lana turned her back to him and assumed the position. Keith hesitated for a moment but eventually inserted his erect penis into her asshole. This caused Lana's body to shake as it was both painful and pleasurable. She cried out as if she had been hurt.

"Are you okay Lana?"

"Fuck me Keith," she repeated, with a trembling voice.

Keith began pumping his dick back and forth within her ass and she continued crying out in pain. But she did not want him to stop. She moved her hand to clench his hand that was groping her breasts. Holding his hand seemed to give her comfort. With her other hand, she inserted her finger into her vagina and began rubbing her clitoris.

With Lana's screams of pain and pleasure growing in intensity, Keith knew that she would climax soon. This was good for he could not hold out much longer. He had been concentrating on delaying his orgasm as he did not want to disappoint his beloved.

And Lana finally came. The orgasms rocked her body with massive shockwaves. The toes inside her high heels involuntary curled inwards and her hands clenched whatever it held even tighter. Her body continued to twist and jerk madly. Lana lost control and started moaning to the top of her lungs.

With his lover now in throes of her orgasms, Keith decided to finally release what he had been delaying. He buried his head into her long brunette hair as he began ejaculating inside her asshole. He inhaled her sophisticated perfume that was all over her long mane. This only heightened the sensual experience of his mighty orgasm.

As Lana felt a warm liquid deep in her ass, she started to feel weak and dizzy from the energy she had expended. She lost her balance as the high heels she wore tilted sideways. This caught her by surprise and her body started falling. She reached out for the base of the open window but missed.

"Nathan!" Keith yelled.

Keith grabbed Nathan's belly with his strong arm and stopped his fall. As his lover recovered her footing, she faced him then started laughing.

"I'm sorry my love," she chuckled. "Did I ruin your orgasm?"

"Oh my god," he thought. "Lana really is Nathan."

Keith believed. But he felt shame, overwhelming shame. The person he betrayed had returned to him without any hate or desire for retribution. Nathan only wanted his love. Keith fell to his knees and embraced Nathan's legs.

"Oh Nathan," Keith began sobbing. "Can you ever forgive me?"

Nathan cried.

"I betrayed you," Keith wept. "Please forgive me!"

Nathan knelt down to face his beloved.

"There is nothing to forgive Keith." Tears flowed down Nathan's beautiful face. "I never hated you."

Keith felt more shame. How could he deserve a love so pure?

"I don't deserve you Nathan," he sobbed. "I betrayed you ..."

Keith stood up and ran away. Nathan followed him outside the hut.

(Begin background music now. http://www.musicaldelites.com/rose.html)

"Don't do this Keith!" Nathan yelled. "Haven't we suffered enough already?"

Keith turned around and faced Nathan. The cousins wiped the tears from their eyes as it blurred their vision.

"How can you forgive me after what I have done?"

"I have forgiven you a very long time ago Keith," Nathan sobbed. "It is yourself who you need to forgive ..."

Keith sat on the ground and curled up like a ball. He continued crying and Nathan knelt before him. Keith lifted his head to look at his beloved cousin. The orange light of the setting sun shone on the supermodel's lovely body. Nathan's beautiful face was covered with tears, but it was full of love.

"We love each other Keith," Nathan cried. "We belong together."

A strong wind came. It ruffled Nathan's dress and his long brunette hair was lifted by the breeze. He looked like an Angel sent by God to save his soul.

"Forgive myself," Keith thought. "I must ..."

And Keith did. All the guilt and pain went away. The heavy burden he had been carrying for the past 23 years was finally gone. Only love remained. A love so pure and powerful, that it filled his heart with immeasurable joy.

"Nathan?" Keith asked.

Lana smiled and nodded -- Yes.

"Nathan!" Keith yelled.

Keith placed his hands around Nathan's slim waist. He stood up and lifted Nathan's light body with his strong arms. He stretched his arms and lifted the supermodel up to the sky.

The strong wind continued to blow against them with an eerie whisper. Nathan pressed his quivering hands towards his chest and cherished the moment. He looked upon his beloved. Keith's face was full of happiness, he had been healed. His cousin now looked like the man he had fallen in love with long ago.

"Beloved," Nathan smiled. "You believe!"

Keith looked up at the supermodel. There was no trace of Nathan in her beautiful form. But he recalled all the hours he had spent with her. He had been with Nathan all along; he just refused to believe it. It was the way she looked at him that reminded him the most about his cousin. Only Nathan looked at him that way -- the same stare she was giving him now.

"Yes Nathan," Keith smiled. "I believe!"

Keith walked in circles and spun Nathan towards the sky. They laughed as their faces filled with jubilation. The soul mates had finally come full circle.

"I love you Nathan!" yelled Keith.

"And I love you!" laughed Nathan.

Keith brought Nathan back down and they embraced in the sunset.

***** THE END *****

This story is dedicated to all the t-girls who have been victimized while in their journey to become whole.

***** FAQ *****

1. Why does Maritess remain pre-op if she can clearly afford the operation? Many of the most beautiful and successful t-girls remain pre-op by choice. You will have to join a Real TS board to read up on the many reasons behind this.

2. Why does Lana hate her legs? A lot of women obsessively hate at least one part of their body without reason. For Lana -- it's her legs, even if her legs are the best.

3. Why is Char so grumpy? She used to be madly in love with a professional athlete and she gave herself entirely to him. But he broke her heart over the phone while she was with Lana in Bora Bora for a one week shoot. It took Lana five days to encourage Char to finally leave her room and face the press. Since then, Char dismissed true love as a myth. But the final events of this story changed her mind.

4. What happened to Sarah? Let's not go there (for now). Thinking about her story makes me depressed.

5. Why do Keith's views on heaven and hell seem too narrow? Well if you are a traditional Roman Catholic, suicide is one of the ultimate sins. And since Nathan stopped going to mass, confession and communion (oh and the Catholic Church doesn't like homosexuals and prostitutes, the Pope thinks it's very wrong), that's a guaranteed one way ticket to hell for the Catholic dogma.

6. Can the Catholic Church forgive Keith's sin of killing someone? Yes, but his priest also demanded that he also denounce and ask forgiveness for his homosexual love for his cousin before he could be allowed to take communion again. Keith found that unacceptable, deep in his heart he knew that their love was one of the greatest truths he had experienced. He would not betray Nathan's love ever again. So Keith stopped going to Church but kept on reading the Bible.

7. Do you hate the Catholic Faith? No, but I think most of their ideas and practices are outdated. They need to make a 3rd Vatican Council soon or see their numbers continue to dwindle in the modern world.

8. Why do your reincarnation concepts not agree with Hinduism, Buddhism, Druze, Gnosticism, Deepak Chopra, etc? The concepts used in this story were inspired from the works of Dr. Ian Stevenson (University of Virginia Health System, Resident Researcher). He has collected over 3000 cases of children with spontaneous past life memories as scientific evidence for reincarnation. He does not use hypnosis and he aggressively disproves most cases that come to him. His work has been published in various medical journals and he avoids the limelight. If you decide to read some of his work, be forewarned for you will be reading a lot of very thick research documents that require a lot of effort to follow. Official website: http://www.healthsystem.virginia.edu/internet/personalitystudies/

9. Do you believe in this shit? I remain open to anything right now. Currently reading a lot of Deepak.

***** Deleted Content *****

In the effort to speed up the story, I have edited out some content.

1. Lana's flashbacks on each of her colorful ex-boyfriends.

2. Gwen's flashback on how she first met Lana.

3. Char's flashback on why she likes Lana despite her being annoyingly romantic.

4. Maritess fucking the good doctor and the good doctor fucking her.

5. More detail on Nathan's transition into a pre-op MTF TS. Most biographies I have read regarding the MTF transition describe it as a very emotionally difficult process. But I'm not sure if people would like that level of realism in a story.

6. More detail on Keith's prison time. Unless you really hate him, you would probably find several chapters on this topic boring. He gets 7 years of torture (and more suffering even after that) -- that's it; let's get on with the story.

7. When both of Nathan's parents die in a car accident, Keith decides to buy their house rather than see it go to someone else. He hires someone to keep the place well maintained and he would often spend long hours in Nathan's room recalling the happiest moments in their lives.

8. The Transvestite Supermodel in a photo-shoot with lots of hunky male models.

9. When Keith and Nathan re-unite, they re-enact a date in the small town's historic downtown district. Nathan bumps into some people he knew before. They don't recognize him, of course, and their reactions upon seeing the supermodel make for some interesting scenes.

10. Keith surprises Nathan by bringing him to his old home. Nathan finds his old cheap locket, with Keith's smiling picture, in a box sent by Sarah to his family.

11. Keith meets the other supermodels. He is most excited about meeting Gwendolyn -- his former favorite supermodel before Svetlana became popular.

12. Keith watches from the front row as Nathan does the catwalk. Ted's nationally televised lingerie runway show is one of Svetlana's last professional appearances.

13. Keith proposes to Nathan.