Disclaimers: This work is a work of fiction and is my property.
The story and characters are fictitious and any resemblance to anyone or any actual event is coincidental. There are three distinctly different main characters that will appear as the story progresses.
You should be legally allowed to read this type of material before continuing.
As it is based on an actual book, I had published a few years ago -- free for your enjoyment -- the story will not contain explicit material in all the chapters BUT don't fret, as it is more the exception than the rule.
Note, that in this chapter, there will be a sexually violent scenario. If this will trigger any trauma for you, please be aware of it before you start reading.
Please direct any comments or feedback to my email address at davidrolsynauthor2019@gmail.com.
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CHAPTER FIFTEEN
William Morgan
Some kind of light appears in the distance and I think I hear a voice.
I'm battling to come to, just trying to focus on figuring out where I am. There's no pain but I'm locked into some kind of fog... I try hard to fight it.
Where am I? I hear something beeping in the background in tune with my own heartbeat. Am I in hospital?
Before I can ask for help, I start to remember what happened. I whimper and start sobbing again.
"It's ok, Will. It's ok. You're safe. I'm here."
It doesn't make sense to me... I shouldn't be hearing that familiar voice.
I try to open my eyes again and for a moment I think it's all a dream. I'm convinced I see Gavin. It must be a dream.
"Hi, baby."
I quiver and flinch as I turn my face away. "Don't call me that."
He tenderly turns my head back towards him. "It's ok, sweetheart. I understand."
I attempt to say something but my whole mouth feels like sawdust.
"Come. Try to have some water." He gently lifts my head up and gives me some water to sip.
"Thanks," I manage hoarsely.
I want to sit up higher onto the pillows but my body feels like lead.
"No, sweetheart. Relax and sleep. I'm not going anywhere."
I start sobbing again and he hugs me.
I fall asleep.
This happens a few more times and every time I'm able to move a little more, until finally I'm able to actually smile at him. But why is he here and how?
Eventually, a day or so later, I'm much better and even start to eat again.
I'm having some pasta when he stares at me very seriously. "The cops want to talk to you, Will."
"No," I say between bites.
"Come on, Will. You cannot let the guy who did this to you get away with it."
I send him a sarcastic smirk.
"What?" he asks.
"You mean guys."
His eyes widen and there is a sudden coldness in them as his seriousness is replaced by obvious anger. "What do you mean, guys? How many?"
I turn away in an attempt to hide my humiliation but he lifts my chin and his kindness returns. Just a little.
"Come on, sweetheart. It wasn't your fault. They raped you."
"Yes, but they said I was looking for it. They'd been watching me with some guys and said that I was obviously begging for it." A tear rolls down my cheek.
"I even started getting hard when they were busy with me."
He looks at me for a moment with a pensive glimmer in his eyes. "Number one, you did not ask for it and the number of guys you've been with does not validate or justify rape. And number two, how your body responded in that situation means nothing."
I want to scream at him "how the fuck would you know??" but I don't want to risk upsetting him and driving him away. Instead, I sigh.
"Can I ask the cops to come in?"
I don't feel like it but I nod in agreement. What choice do I have?
He leaves the hospital room and comes back with two police officers. It dawns on me that they've given me private room. Who's paying for all this?
"Good afternoon, Mr. Morgan," the one officer says, shifting uncomfortably but maintaining his authority. The other officer stands with his arms crossed.
"Good afternoon, Officer," I reply.
"Call me Stan."
I manage a weak smile. "Then call me Will."
"Ok, Will. Can you please tell us what happened?"
I proceed to tell them what happened that horrible night, which I now find out was more than five days ago! Every now and then I swallow and have to fight back the overwhelming urge to weep. They take down all the information and take copious notes.
Gavin gently squeezes my hand when my emotions start to take over and I somehow manage to get through the interview.
When it's done, the one cop looks at me with a furrowed brow. "You say you know the one guy called Anthony, but not the other two?"
I nod.
"And you say that it seems they used some chemical on you before you woke up?"
Again, I nod.
"We checked with the doctor and unfortunately there was no..." he pauses. "...No evidence found on your person that can be linked to any of your attackers."
I inhale slowly.
"What the hell is that supposed to mean?!" Gavin yells at them.
The officer clears his throat. "It means, sir, that, unless we have any evidence that can prove they did in fact rape Mr. Morgan, we will only have his word against theirs. It will be impossible to prosecute these men in a court of law."
I sigh.
"This is fucking ridiculous." Gavin slams his hand down on the bed rail. "You mean to tell me they can just get away with it?!"
The officer scowls at Gavin. "Please try to contain your anger, sir?!"
Gavin lets out a loud exhalation and calms down a bit.
The officer slips his notepad and pen into his shirt pocket. "I'm sorry, Will, but unless we can find any evidence, we will have a tough time linking them to the crime. We have already searched your apartment carefully and found nothing except proof that you live there."
I nod.
"It may be advisable to stay elsewhere for a period, to ensure your safety, should your attackers decide to return. Do you have anywhere to stay when you get out of here?"
"Can't you guys provide some sort of protection?" Gavin asks.
The officer shakes his head. "No, unfortunately not. We have limited resources and since we have no evidence, except for the obvious proof of assault, we cannot offer personal protection."
"Thank you, Stan. Please let us leave it now," I say to him.
"But, baby...sweetheart?" Gavin grips my hand.
"I said let's leave it!" and I turn my head away from them.
The cops thank us and leave.
We are both quiet for a while, both of us lost in our own thoughts, until I turn to look at him. "Why are you here, Gavin?"
"I tried your phone the day Ozzie found you, and he told me everything. Thank goodness you told him about us. He felt comfortable sharing with me what happened and felt it was the appropriate thing to do, considering our history, Will, and of course considering the seriousness of what happened to you. I immediately arranged for my assistant to take over at the hotel and flew up to see you."
I study him more carefully. He is the poster boy for hell himself, his face drawn, his eyes red. His clothes smell like sweat. Probably been wearing the same ones all this time. "You need to shower."
He chuckles, lean towards his armpit to smell himself but quickly pulls his nose away before he even reaches it. "Phew!"
"Oh hell, yes, I'll look for a hotel nearby and go freshen up. I'll see you later." He leans over and kisses me softly on my still tender lips.
Gavin leaves and I'm left alone with my own depressing thoughts.
Gavin returned later and spent almost every waking moment with me. He managed to go out and get some clothes and toiletries for me. When it was time to be discharged, I stayed with him at the hotel close to the hospital.
The doctor made me see a psychologist and although I was resistant at first, he told me that if I don't get therapy, I'll suffer the consequences for the rest of my life.
I listened, but mostly because Gavin insisted and because of my insistence that he come along.
The one good thing that I learnt from the sessions was that rape is more an act of control and violence and not necessarily about sex. I found it difficult to believe, but eventually accepted it. What was worrying me most was whether I contracted something from the assault. As far as I could tell, they hadn't used any condoms.
They tested me for sexually transmitted diseases and luckily all of them came back negative. However, I had to wait for the results of the major tests. Even though I'd been counseled about the possibility that I'd contacted the virus, I was told that until I knew for certain, whatever the result might be, there was no point in thinking about it too much. Which of course was easier said than done. I would just have to wait and see.
I also saw Ozzie and Belinda at the hospital a few times and found out that Belinda had been the one who footed the bill. This was flabbergasting to me and I promised to pay her back but she wanted to hear nothing of it.
It was surprising to hear Mason had also come around and brought me flowers, compliments of the team at the club, he'd said. Gavin said that he had been a little uncomfortable. It was nice of him in any case.
My face still had scars and cuts but the doctor said that most of them were fortunately not too deep and that it would heal over time. They managed to repair my sphincter, anus, and rectum from the lacerations but advised me to refrain from having anal sex for at least four months.
Luckily my prostate gland hadn't been seriously damaged by the attack.
Needless to say, I wasn't in the mood for sex anyway.
Gavin was nothing if not doting. It was nice to be taken care of, and he managed to help me sort out some personal tasks, like paying bills and changing the lock on my apartment door. I couldn't tell him that I was afraid to return to the apartment.
Eventually I had to, but I asked him to come with me and he offered to check out of the hotel to stay with me for a couple of days. Eventually he'll have to go back home to his normal life and the job he loved.
I'm going to miss him.
This morning, before he went out to run some errands, he said he wanted to take me out to dinner tonight and I reluctantly agreed. I've become extremely skittish and I see Anthony, Roger, and the other guy in every man that even remotely resembles them.
Gavin reminded me that I had gotten this far and that I should persevere in getting my life back. I'm just not sure that I'll ever be as bold or perhaps as stupid as I've been in the past.
He arrived back around 3:00 p.m. and we spent time relaxing on the bed, until we both got up to separately shower and get dressed. I'm so glad that he's made it easy for me not to think about sex, even though it's hard being around him... It's left me uncomfortable, because I'm not sure if I can ever let someone near me again.
We arrive at a little Italian restaurant outside the city center and we order a pizza to share. I'm relieved that he chose such an inconspicuous place. Most of the patrons and staff don't even look at us and it feels like we are just two normal guys sharing a pizza.
Granted that he's his usual gentlemanly self, but we're not showing any public displays of affection, and to the others in the restaurant, my scars must have paid testament to the fact that I'd recently been hospitalized.
"Will."
"Yes?"
"I've been thinking about us." He sets his slice of half-eaten pizza on the plate.
Here it comes. He has to go back home soon.
"Yes," I say with a pathetic croak in my voice and clear my throat.
"I missed you after you left and I threw myself deep into my work. I couldn't stop thinking of you."
Where is this going?
"The thing is, I always assumed I was straight until I met you and now I cannot look at a woman the same way as before. To be honest, I think I always just pretended to be interested in girls, because that was all I knew and I never, ever thought that I might be attracted to men, that is, until you came along."
Ok. I nod.
"I think what I'm trying to say, or ask, is that I'm definitely attracted to you and may in fact be in love with you and want you to come back with me."
There it is. What!?
I wince as I widen my eyes. "Are you serious, Gavin?"
He pulls a pepperoni off his pizza. "Yes. You know I don't joke about things like this and I would really like you to come and live with me. You don't really have a job here and I think a change will do you good. Especially if I can also keep an eye on you and make sure you're safe and taken care of. What do you say?"
I think of various reasons why I should say no, but end up with none. "Yes."
"Great!" His smile lights up the entire room.
"And don't worry about the logistics. Tonight, when we get home, we'll sit down, make lists of everything that needs to be done, sold or organized, and then take it one step at a time, ok?"
Always the manager. I smile shyly.
A thought strikes me and I become serious.
"Gavin. You know that I feel the same about you, don't you?"
"Yes?"
"And I would never want to hurt you."
"Yes?"
"I'm just not sure I can let anyone touch me like...that...again soon, maybe ever."
"We'll take it one day at a time, sweetheart. One day at a time. I love you for who you are and not because of what you can give me. You know that?"
"Yes, but love is sometimes not enough."
Gavin leans over and keeps his voice low. "I think that's the point. If we only wanted to be together because of the sex, then what would the relationship be worth? I don't want to be with you just for that. Making love with you is great, mind you. But also, because there are other things about you that inspires me to want to get up in the morning. You are perceptive, gentle, and an amazing listener. I love the fact that you think I'm the sexiest guy in the world, which I could argue with, but it feels rather good to be admired like that. I also enjoy the fact that you appreciate the goals I've set for myself and that you're willing to encourage me to reach them. Aren't you?"
"Of course," I say. "I also have to rediscover exactly what it is that makes me happy...and being in this city, with no job and with what happened recently, I'm not so sure I'll be able to do that. A change of pace might just be what I need. You might be that change."
He smiles and squeezes my hand gently. "Well, then it's settled. We'll get our list ready and maybe by next week, Thursday, we can head back to what will be your new home."
It hurts to smile but I can't help it. "So then, are we officially dating?"
"Seriously...you haven't noticed?" He smiles with a wink.
That damn wink again. My dick stirs a little.
We head home after dinner. He takes out a notebook and we jot down a list of things we want to do; who we need to inform about my move and the names of those we have to visit and say goodbye to.
Between tying things up and packing, we manage to go see Ozzie and Belinda.
Belinda is ecstatic. She's all over me with kisses, smiling from ear to ear. Ozzie is a bit more subdued.
"You sure this is the right thing for you, bud?"
"Yes, Ozzie. He treats me well." I hug Gavin who looks unusually bashful.
Ozzie offers me a defeated smile. "Ok then. But you will always have a home with us you know. Right, Belinda?"
"Of course!" She claps her hands.
I smile.
"Thank you, guys, for all that you've done. And Belinda, I'll pay you back for what you spent on the hospital bill," I remind her for the hundredth time. It was a small fortune!
"Nah. Keep it as a wedding present, dude," she winks.
I shoot a glance at Gavin and he smiles coyly.
We hug them goodbye, head home, finalize the details of our plans then pack our suitcases for the flight "home."
Home? It has a nice ring to it.