Too damn hot... couldn't sleep, tossing and turning... humidity at 97% and every dog in the city howling. Every now and then a cars headlights would flash through the open blinds and startle me.
I sat up, and ran my fingers through my hair, then stretched -- full body, feeling the new sunburn tighten on my skin.
Yawning I got up out of bed, and stepped over Jasper. Picking my watch up and looking at the time, damn, I didn't want to be up this early. It was Saturday, my first weekend in three months, but it was too damn hot to sleep.
I washed my face and teeth, and heard Jasper dragging through the apartment, I heard him yawn and realized he needed to go out. I grumbled to myself, something about smart dogs as I pulled a tank top and some shorts on.
On my way out the door I stepped into some "birks" and grabbed the leash and whistled a short 'wheet.'
He came running; kinda...he was such a happy guy Jasper.... 4-year-old basset hound that my ex had left with me. He was kinda cute the way he dusted the hard wood floors with his ears, and the way he was my loyal sidekick, I had taken him to Double Rainbow for ice cream, after that bartender at Shays had broken my heart. That was 3 years ago, he just sort of stayed.
We walked for a few blocks...the night was beautiful clear...too damn hot...but the kind of night that just sucks you in.... where cold beer is better than 100-year-old congnac...and the sweet smell of honeysuckle lingers, and drips in the air.
On my way back, I noticed a car just outside the building with steamed windows, and for a second I thought I heard the sweet sound of my neighbor Carol's laugh. It was distinctable, the way it made you wish you were the one making her smile...it was like honey that you wanted to savor...then swallow slowly.
And there I was blushing in the middle of the street, in the middle of the night...thinking a wild fantasy about my neighbor.
Carol lived on the other side of the quad, so that my hall window faced hers. Often I would see her working out, and she would catch me admiring, and smile and wave at me. I would smile back, blush and be grateful for the distance between apartments, grateful that she couldn't see me.
I tossed a quick glance at the rocking car, and then ran with Jasper into the building and up the stairs. Phil was just coming out of his place and said something about my being up so early, or was it so late, and I laughed and told him that Jasper had had a date. He threw me the peace sign and got into the elevator that led to the garage.
Once inside, I quickly ripped the clothes from me and jumped into the shower. Each drop of water felt like acid upon my reddened raw skin. I got out, wrapped a towel around my waist and turned the lights on dimly. I grabbed a beer from the fridge and swallowed hard thinking of my neighbor in that car, and thinking about passion that wouldn't let her come in, heat so insistent that they couldn't wait...whew!!!
I took another swallow, went and grabbed my torch; I adjusted the tanks and opened the window for proper ventilation. I started making nickel scrolls to adorn the metal sculpture I was doing of the ideal womyn. After a while I turned on the stereo, softly come the sexy tones of Stan Getz playing Cocovado, leaving me melting, and wishing for something steamy.
I looked out my window and saw the faint, fiery horizon in the east, muted by the silver tones of early morning. I stretched again, felt my hardened nipples and sighed.... I went back to work, glancing once at Carol's apartment...looked empty.
I grabbed another beer and toasted alone, the importance of one celebrating their vacation. I sat in the window seat and kicked back as Desfinado played. I took the towel away and reached down between my legs...I had always imagined myself making slow passionate love to someone while this music played.... But most of the womyn who ever came back here didn't have a clue to Bossa Nova, hadn't ever heard of Jobim and it was usually the "kiss me, touch me, fuck me, I'm gone" routine. They never really stayed long enough for me to tell them of my passions.... my art, my writing's, the way I feel...they lacked soul...but they were fun in the beginning, at least that is what I kept telling myself.
I rubbed my clit between my fingers slowly, faintly then harder. I started remembering, the last womyn who had been here, she kept asking me to hurt her. It had taken me awhile, but then because she had annoyed me so much, I gave into her, biting and flogging, she got so hot from it, that in turn I came really hard too. She had said that I was too soft, and would have to learn more before she and I could play again. But I remember the way her clit looked...the hood was pierced with a 'star of david' stud that kept clanking on my teeth.... but when she came, she poured sweet into my mouth.
I was getting so hot thinking of this, that I felt myself gush bubbles of joy. I reached and grabbed a tapered candle from the table behind me and slowly pushed it into me as "agua de beber" came floating around the corner, smoothing the edges of daylight. I pushed that candle deep into me, then pulled slowly out, and back in as far as it would go, and then I moved it in circles and pulled out, and back in as far as it would go, and then I moved back in and pulled out, and once more deep inside. With my other hand I tweaked my nipples, brushed them, squeezed, and felt waves building inside of me. I rocked hard, and came.... the candle still embedded deep.... and then pouring hot liquid, the candle popped out. I reached down and fumbled for the beer and took a swallow. It had warmed since I had set it down, but it was wet and I was parched.
I caught my breath, and sat upright swaying to "samba pa ti." I went into the bathroom, grabbed a bottle of lotion and applied it to my arms and legs and started slowly massaging my breasts.... large round circles outlining my aureoles, bringing them up hard.... and wishing I could share this moment with someone. My whole body tingled...that orgasm had been rich the way it took hold of me, and shook me to my core. I went over and stooped to pick up the candle now laying on the floor, and upon rising saw Carol in the window staring back at me. I stood there frozen, like a deer caught in headlights...frozen but not afraid, not blushing this time. This was my world, my music, my sculpture, my dog and my orgasm. She smiled again, and ran her hand from her breast down into her shorts, and made a gesture like she was pulling me to her.
Chills ran through me...even though it was too damn hot.
by carol marie