Notes: First at all, I would like to say thanks (many thanks actually) to Andy (Author: Simply Words) who helped me to check this part for me. I still had less response on the last installment (Gezz where did I do wrong?). Anyway, thanks to Yuli and Andrew who sent me great comments, and everyone who keep reading my story. This chapter is a bit longer than usual, this is my favorite part so far. Ok as usual send your comment/flames/ideas to Tonny at aspire34@go.com
Disclaimer This story contains gay relationships between Justin Randall Timberlake and a fictional character plus others. This story in no way implies that him or any character in this story is gay. If you are under the legal age to read such material in your area please leave immediately. The author takes no responsibility for anyone's actions based upon this work of fiction.
********************************************************************* WHEN YOU SAY NOTHING AT ALL ********************************************************************* Previously on "When You Say Nothing AT All":
I was so surprised when I saw Justin was lying naked on the bed with his shirt, pant and underwear on the floor. "Come here Ton, lets make a love to me" he said exotically while I still amazed what I saw and stunned. "Come here honey," he repeated again as he got up from the bed and approached me and I just smiled at him.
CHAPTER 5: I Want To Spend My Lifetime Loving You
I still kept my fake smile to him, I knew what he was doing now, and he actually asked me to have sex with him. I stood there, not moving even an inch; now we were pretty closed. He came to me with his 'wicked' smile then he kissed my neck way up until he licked my ear. I decided to move my way close to the bed, leaving Justin on the place where we just stood. He still kept smiling, I picked up his clothes from the floor and threw it to his face but he didn't catch it so it just dropped to the floor again near his foot.
"Put your clothes on please," I said calmly as I sat on the bed
"WHAT? COME ON DON'T BE SUCH A HYPOCRITE! I KNOW YOU WANT IT TO" he yelled at me with anger on my action of ignoring him
"Put your clothes ON" I replied my request again sternly
"FUCK YOU TON! I TRY MY BEST TO MAKE MYSELF TO LOVE YOU! TODAY IS MY BIRTHDAY! I'M 18 TODAY! JUST MAKE LOVE TO ME...FOR GOD SAKE!" he said out loud. I really couldn't believe what I heard. That words came out from my Justin, I tried to hold my temper before, but now I couldn't hold it anymore.
"WHO ARE YOU? YOU'RE NOT JUSTIN THAT I'VE KNOWN. THIS IS NOT THE JUSTIN THAT I LOVE," I said sternly as I dropped my tears, "Ok, if that's what you want" then I took my shirt and pants off but I still kept my boxer. I lied my back on the bed and closed my eyes, "DO IT! YOU CAN DO ANYTHING! YOU CAN SUCK ME! FUCK ME! SCREW ME! DO ANYTHING WHAT YOU WANT! DON'T EXPECT ME TO DO ANYTHING WITH YOU, BECAUSE I'LL KEEP MY EYES CLOSE" I said it loud with tears still falling from my closed eyes. I waited for a couple minutes, I didn't hear anything from him, then I opened my eyes and looked at him, he was shaking and crying.
"What are you waiting for? Come on! You're 18 right? You know how to do it I supposed!" I said sarcastically and yet he was still crying.
"Look at you! Justin look at yourself." I said as I got up, grab a blanket to cover my body and sat on the bed.
"You make yourself so low! I know you're 18 now. You're probably ready for it, which I doubt it. I'm not ready yet. How dare you to ask me to have sex with you to maintain our relationship. We just met less than a week. You expect me to have sex with you? This is not the right time Just! Maybe it's for you but not for me" I said with trembling in my voice and tried to hold my tears. Justin just sat on the floor with his back against the wall and covered his face with both hands and yet still crying.
"Now you know how I am. I know that I've just known you for less than a week, but I love my old Justin. So this is me, if you love me, you should accept me whoever I am. Do you still love me now?" I popped out the question. I was waiting for his answer for a couple minutes. He kept his silent and sobbing.
"DO YOU?" I repeated the question again with tears falling again from my eyes. I was so afraid that he was going to doubt my love for him and say 'no'. I put my left hand on my forehead, he even couldn't look at me. After 10 minutes of silent, I tried to stand up and picked my clothes from the floor and ready to leave him.
"I do." he said softly and still looked down. I stopped my way to leave him. I didn't know what to do or what to say when he said those 2 words.
"Thank you" I replied softly
"I'm so sorry Ton, I didn't know what I've just done to myself. I'm really sorry" he said and still covered his face and crying. I knew that he was probably bigger than me and 18 years old but inside he was still teenager. Then I came to him, sat next to him on the floor with my back against the wall. Since there was no string attach on him, I covered his body with my blanket.
"That's all right. Please don't cry," I put my right hand on his shoulder, pulled him closer to me, "This is your happy day. You produced a gallon of tears already," I joked on him and I pulled his hand away from his face. I could see bloodshot in his eyes and yet he was still sobbing. I stood up and helped him to stand up too then I hugged him very tightly.
"I know that you still love me" I whispered to his ear. We both sat on the bed and he still hold me tight; he put his head on my shoulder and I really didn't know what to do, so we were just hugging for an hour or so until I realized he was sleeping on my shoulder. I slowly put him down on the bed and covered his body with the blanket. I kissed him on his cheek then I picked up his clothes from the floor and put it on the table next to his bed. I put my PJ on and slept on the other bed next to him. 'What a drama!' I though myself before I finally felt asleep.
Hard Rock Hotel 08:00am 01/02/1999
I woke up around 8, I quickly checked on Justin, on the bed next to mine. I couldn't see him on the bed, 'that's weird, Justin never gets up pretty early, where is he' I asked myself. I got up from the bed; checked the toilet and still couldn't find him. Then I found him, he stood outside in the balcony, watching the sunrise which finally showed up from the horizon. I came to him and hugged him from the back, I put my hands around his waist.
"Morning, Just!" I whispered to him
"Morning ton" he turned his face and smiled at me then turned back to watch the sunrise and the waves at Kuta beach.
"Why did you wake up so early?" I said calmly as I put my face over his shoulder to watch the sunrise.
"Just thinking" he replied shortly
"About what?" I asked him back as both of us watched the views.
"About us!"
"What about us?" I whispered on his ear
"I'm thinking...that you should leave me" I was shocked what he just said to me; I pulled out my hands from his waist and stood next to him. "you don't deserve me, you can find someone better than me and threat you right" he said and turned his face to me
"Wha...Why are you saying this?" I said still in shock
"I've been thinking; I know that I've just known you for a week or so, and look what I always did to you. I always made you worrying about me, hurts you and made you sad. And you always treat me so good, it's not fair for you Ton" he said and tried to hold his tears; turned his face to the beach.
"Please Justin, don't say it. Justin! Look at me!" I put my hand to his face and turned it to face me. "No matter how many times you hurts me or how pain it is, and I don't care. As long as you're with me, you make me the happiest person on earth. I love you" I said as I was welling up with tears.
"Oh Ton! I LOVE YOU TOO!" he hugged me back tightly and I turned my tears to tears full of joy. I settled myself back to the previous position. I hold him from his back and put my face on his shoulder as both of us watching the sun finally fully showed up. Then Justin started to sing a song
You've got a way with me Somehow you got me to believe In everything that I could be I've gotta say-you really got a way
You've got a way it seems You gave me faith to find my dreams You'll never know just what that means Can't you see...you got a way with me
(We moved our body slowly from left to right repetitively)
It's in the way you want me It's in the way you hold me The way you show me just what loves made of It's in the way we make love
(I knew the song, before he started the next line, I cut him off and sang the rest of the lyrics)
You've got a way with words You get me smiling even when it hurts There's no way to measure what your love is worth I can't believe the way you get through to me
It's in the way you want me It's in the way you hold me The way you show me just what loves made of It's in the way we make love
Oh, how I adore you Like no one before you I love you just the way you are It's just the way you are
Then I kissed his neck lightly, we both just smiled.
"Ok I'm starving, let's order some room service. What do you want?"
"Anything, you pick!" he turned his face to me happily
"Do you want to try special fried rice? It's delicious"
"Yeah sure, as long as not too spicy"
"Okay, I give a call for room service. Why don't you get a bath so we can spend the rest of the day sightseeing?"
"Okay" he replied and heading to the bathroom but he was back to me again and kissed me, "I love you". I smiled at him and kissed him back.
"Ok get a bath now! You're stink!" I joked and he laughed too
"Hey! I though you love me just the way I am" he joked on me back
"Well yeah but not with that smell!" I replied and closed my nose with my hand, "Ok quick! Before I fainted from your smell" I laughed and he giggled then I pushed him to the bathroom.
I made an order for our breakfast. As usual, it took an 'ages' for Justin in the bathroom, even the breakfast came already and he was still in the bathroom.
"JUSTIN! Aren't you finished yet?" I yelled in front of the bathroom door.
"Just a minute, ton!" he replied
"You said that 20 minutes ago" I said as I was knocking the door several times, "Quickly Just! Before you breakfast is spoiled" I giggled. Finally he opened the door.
"DONE!" he jumped at me; we wore white shirt with khakis pants. "How do I smell now?" he asked me happily
"Hmmmmm this is my baby Justin that I like" I kissed him and he pushed me away from him
"Ton I don't want to be rude but you're stink" he giggled
"Excuse me!" I laughed that he got me now
"No, No! Excuse YOU! You have to have to get a long bath with that smell on you" he laughed as he pushed me to the bathroom
"Ha ha ha Ok! I had my breakfast already, why don't you eat while waiting for me OK" I said as I closed the bathroom door. I took 15 minutes bath and brushed my teeth. Then I opened the bathroom door and Justin just stood there with grinned.
"Hmmmm you smell much better than before" he giggled
"Okay okay that's enough. Ready? How was your fried rice?" I asked him
"It was fantastico!" he said and I smiled, "Ok come on! It's nearly 11 already" he took my hands, "Where are we going today?" he asked me.
"What about visiting some villages and seeing some local arts. Then in the afternoon we can go to the beach and have some funs like Banana Boats or Para-sailing perhaps" I told him
"Really! Yi haaaaa!" Justin yelled out loud and jumping up and down, "Ok then lets go!" he said as he smacked my butt.
"HEY!!!" I yelled at him and he just laughed. We were heading downstairs to the reception and asked for a guide for our little tour in Bali.
"Wait! I'm going to buy some snacks for our ride" I told Justin to stay and he nodded. I returned in 5 minutes
"What did you buy?" he asked
"2 bottles of mineral water and a pack of Oreo" I said
"Fantastic! Now give me the Oreo," he said as he quickly grab a box of Oreo from my hands
"Thank you Justin!" I said sarcastically and he just laughed as opening the box.
We started our ride. The weather was perfect, not too hot and not too windy. We saw some Balinese cultures on some traditional villages. We stopped at the art and handicraft shop; we were browsing some paintings and statues. While Justin was busy with looking some paintings, I decided to buy something for him but I didn't want to tell him yet. It was so small so I could hide it in my pocket. Before heading back to our hotel, we stopped at McDonalds for our lunch. I was glad that Justin was enjoying his time so far. Around 2pm, we arrived at the hotel for changes our outfit for the beach. Justin changed his pants to his short and me too. I grab some spare clothes and towels for Justin and me, just in case if we get wet. Finally we were heading to the beach. We found our seats on the white sands and it was shades from the coconut tree above.
"Wait Justin! Please put sunblock first" I said as I handed him a tube of sunblock SPF15+. Since he decided want to get tanned from the sun, he took his shirt off.
"Can you put some sunblock on my back please" he asked and I nodded. I put the cream on his back, "Do you just wear that shirt on the beach?" he asked me again
"I think, I'm already tanned enough" I replied and he giggled. Then he stood up in front of me.
"So what do I look now? Am I sexy or cute?" he said as he showed some muscles then shaking his hip from left to right then back and forward several times. I just laughed on his 'stupid' action.
"Well..." I stood up and walked around him, "So you got the looks and got the moves but that don't impress me much!" I said as I stuck my palm in front of his face and rolling my head; doing what the Shania did in the video clips, then I laughed out loud.
"TONY!" he yelled and jumped at me. 'O boy he is heavy!' I though. Then I fell my back on the sands and Justin was on top of me. We just stood like that for 5 minutes or so.
"Justin! Can you get off me please? We're on the beach," I said softly
"Opps I'm sorry" he said as quickly got up and helped me up. I brushed some sands from my body and Justin did the same.
"Come on! Let's have some fun" I said as pointed the Banana Boat on the sea.
"Yesss! Ok quick!" he said as he dragged me to the Banana Boat. Most of the rides were so expensive, even they charged you in US dollars instead in Rupiah. I had to do some bargaining skills to get a discount, however Justin insisted that he wanted to ride the Banana Boat and insisted to pay for the ride. So I agreed with his offers. We rode the Banana Boat for 15 minutes and I fell twice to the water while Justin just laughed at me. After the Banana Boat ride, we changed our clothes. Then Justin decided to try the Para-sailing, actually I didn't like the idea of being lifting on the air and drag by a small boat. However, since he asked me nicely, I granted his request. He asked me to join him up on the air, but I turned down his request; the ride was quite expensive for two people, so I decided just sat on the boat and watching Justin on the air with a parachute. After the ride ended, we decided to go swimming on the 'Water Boom Park', the place was quite crowded and huge. At 5pm, we decided to go back to hotel for a quick shower and rest, watching MTV. We had our dinner at Hard Rock Café at 6:30pm, and I managed to get the HRC Menus for JC. After dinner, we left HRC and heading to the beach for some air. It was so quite since it was pretty late; the only thing that can be heard was the sound of the waves crashing against the shore. I sat on the white sands and Justin lain on the sands with his head on my laps.
"Just! Did you aware that no one recognized you at all while we are here?" I asked him with smile
"Yeah, sometimes it's relieved me being away from the fans and having fun with you" he replied
"I'm glad that you're happy" I added then we just were staring into each other eyes for quite awhile until Justin's cell phone rang. He pulled his phone from his pocket and sat up next to me.
"Hello?" Justin said, "Hi Mom! I'm good in here. I have a lot of fun with Tony" Justin replied as he smiled at me, as I heard he was talking with his mom, my hands started shaking. I couldn't hear what the conversation was all about. I was so worried. After half an hour of talking, he ended the conversation; and he put his head back on my laps and smiled at me.
"So, everything is fine?" I questioned him
"Yeah, my mom was just checking me, as usual" he replied to me.
Then we just kept quite, 'I have to tell this to Justin! Sooner is better, before it's out of hand' I though to myself. I wasn't sure how Justin would react toward this.
"Just?" I called him softly while he kept watching to the sea
"Hmmmm?" he replied
"Do you think our relationship is going to work?" I asked him with worried on my chest. Justin shocked on my question and he got up and sat in front of me and looked directly into my eyes.
"Oh no, you don't ton! Please don't doubt on our relationship. I doubted with it this morning but you could put faith back in me. If you doubt with it now, I'm not sure whether I can put back the faith in you. Please Ton!" he said sternly
"No I don't doubt on our relationship, just..." I stopped as I tried to find the right words.
"Please Ton what's wrong?" he looked concern and held my hands. I took a moment then a deep breath.
"Your mom"
"My mom? My mom is happy for us"
"Actually, that wasn't what she said to me last time"
"What do you mean?"
"Last time when I talked to your mom on the phone, she asked me to leave you" I said as I unfolded the truth
"WHAT! Why didn't you tell me?" he shouted and I could see his expression changed to anger.
"Justin! I couldn't tell you that time. You were sick, I didn't want you to get more stress from this matters, so I just lied to you. Besides your mom asked me not to tell you about this" I explained to him, as I felt ashamed of myself. I tried to hold my tears from my eyes. I still saw anger on his face, he wasn't angry at me but angry to his mom, who tried to break him up behind his back.
"I think, I'm going to have a little talk with my mom" he said as he pulled the cell phone from his pocket and started to dial some numbers, but I stopped him.
"Please Justin! Don't do it" I requested
"No Ton, I have to sort this out with my mom NOW. How could she do this to me? She was playing nice to me and hard ball to you" he said but I quickly took his cell phone from his hand.
"Justin please, I know you want to have words with your mom. But you have to tell it face to face with your mom, not on the phone. Please, I don't want to ruin our last night in Bali, I want to spend this night with you without problems. It's just you and me now. Please Justin, do it for me please." I begged him
"Ok I'll do it for you, but I'll have to talk to my mom later on" he said and I nodded, "I'm not going to leave you and you're not going to leave me. No matter what my mom thinks." he said clearly.
"Thank you" I replied to him then he kissed me on the lips and I returned his kiss. We kissed for more than 15 minutes; that was the longest kiss I've ever had. I looked at my watch; it was 10pm already. I asked him to go back to our room since we had an early flight on the next day. He agreed with me; we were heading back to the hotel. We were sleeping in the same bed than separated like last night. It was a single bed but we could handle it since we hugged tightly while we were sleeping.
Hard Rock Hotel 08:00am 02/02/1999
The phone rang, it was a wake up call for us. I picked up the phone while Justin put a pillow on his face. After I got the message, I hang up the phone.
"Justin! Wake up!" I said as I started to shake him
"Not now Ton!" he grouched
"Justin! We have to have breakfast before going to the airport"
"Why don't you take a bath first when you're done then call me again"
"Ok then" I got up and heading my way to the bathroom. I took a quick bath for 15 minutes. Then I went out from the bathroom, and yet he was still sleeping.
"Justin! Your turn!" I said as I prepare his clothes and packed our bags. "JUSTIN!" I yelled at him
"Ummmmm I don't want to go yet! I want to stay here forever," he said
"Justin, I though, we discussed this before. Come on, we're going to have breakfast outside" I tried to persuade him and yet he still closed his face with a pillow. "Justin, please don't do this to me again" I said softly with sad tones. Finally Justin opened his face.
"Sorry Ton. I'm sorry. I did it again, didn't I?" he sat up, "I just want to spend more days with you in here" he said with his puppy face.
"Me too, but not now Just! But I promised that I'll take you back here again OK" I said with smiled and he returned my smile. He obeyed my request and went to the bathroom straight away. I wasn't complaining at all when he took 45 minutes to get ready. At 09:15, we checked out but we left our stuff in the storage room since our ride to the airport was at 11:00. I promised him to have a breakfast out from the hotel for a change, then I took him 'La Lucciola Restaurant'. The restaurant actually is close to the beach. We could see some people running around at the beach doing some activities. The foods were superb and Justin seems like it too. We were back to the hotel just in time, a driver was waiting to take us to the airport. We arrived at Ngurah Rai Airport at 12:15pm, we were waiting in the long queue, there were a lot of tourist that day. The flight was delayed for 30 minutes but we wouldn't bother at all.
My Place, PERTH-WA 18:15 02/02/1999
We arrived at my place and exhausted. Justin just sat down on the couch while I checked my mails, as usual junks, bills, bills, and bills; always at the beginning of the month.
"Do you want anything Just?" I asked him while he just sat on the couch look 'stupid'.
"No thanks!" he replied
"Did you have fun yet?" I asked him to cheer him up
"The BEST!" he smiled at me, "But now I'mm really tired, I hate flight" he complained.
"Well it's better than swimming pass the ocean though" I joked and he laughed too, "Why don't you change your clothes and sleep straight away" I told him.
"Ok, would you come with me?" he asked as he stood up from the couch
"Yep in the minutes, I still want to check some mails in here" I replied as I opened some mails in my hand
"Don't be long ok," he said and I just nodded.
After 15 minutes checking my mails, I decided to go to bed with Justin. I saw him already felt asleep already, 'he must be so tired!' I exclaimed to myself. I slept next to him and hugged him, 'it's gonna be different tomorrow' I sighed and felt asleep.
My Place 09:25 02/02/1999
I awoke at 09:25, I could see Justin still asleep next to him. Since I didn't decide to do anything on our last day with him, so I let him to sleep as long as he wanted too. I took a quick shower and had cereal for breakfast. I logged on to Internet and checked my emails; I had 21 emails, 18 emails mainly from 'KR'. I checked one by one, and basically his message was the same, asked me where I had been. Then I got a chat request via ICQ, guess who? I clicked accept button.
Hi there!
Aspire! Where've you been man? I tried to contact you via email. Are you OK?
Yeah I'm fine. I received your emails, actually I just read your 18th messages.
so where've you been?
I went for holiday to Bali :p
cool! With your bf?
Not your business pal ;)
hmmm I see, so has he left yet?
Nope, 'till tomorrow morning
Ok, where does he live again
Florida
cool, I'm in Florida atm, maybe I can meet your boyfriend here
Hey! Watch Out! :#
hahaha Just joking well I dunno your bf looks like anyway : )
Yeah you right;)
We were chatting for an hour or so, we were talking about my vacations and also his works (but not much detail). I saw the clock, it was nearly midday, so I decided to stop the conversation with him and logged off. I checked Justin in my bedroom and yet he was still sleeping. I went to the kitchen and made some foods for him then brought it to the bedroom. He finally opened his eyes when I came in.
"Hi!" Justin smiled at me, "Wow! Breakfast in bed?" he giggled
"Actually, it's lunch in bed since it's 12:15" I joked and he laughed, "This is your last lunch in Perth." I said and Justin stopped laughing, and looked sadness in his face of the though leaving me so soon. "Justin, it's gonna be fine. It doesn't like we won't meet each other anymore" I assured him, "Now I want to see your smile" I asked him and he smiled back to me. After having lunch, we just sat on the bed, silent, just enjoyed ours last precious hours together.
TBC (I Hope)
As usual guys, suggestions, flames, comments, ideas please send it to TonnY aspire34@go.com Writing this story was fun at first, now it's really getting stressful, I hate to continue this story, but it's far from end. If someone just could read my minds and tell the story to others.